: I think this is the first time I've started a post that's ended up in a debate! :LOL
In looking back, and reading the responses to both my op and the follow up post, I can see the logic of using a different phrase than "Didn't listen" The disappointment factor, I will not discuss, because like Raven, I believe they should know when they have disappointed me, but I also want to know when they feel disappointed with something I've done. She did *hear* me, but she didn't *listen. She didn't obey, if you prefer that choice of word. We use phrases like "Where are our listening ears today?" and make a big game out of looking in our mouths, under our feet, in our tummy, to find our ears when we're not listening...After we find our listening ears, we put them on our head, really tightly, then repeat the request. They do it to me, if I'm distracted (reading posts on MDC, for example
) And I don't respond quickly, they'll say "Mommy, are you wearing your listening ears?" "No, honey, I wasn't....let's see if I can find them...oh here they are, I forgot them under my left foot.....okay, they are on now, I'm sorry, could you please repeat yourself?" It's our way of making sure that we're being heard in a lighthearted manner. I suppose I could have asked her if she was wearing her listening ears, but I was just to angry and frustrated with the defiance( again, in case anyone misunderstands...I know she wasn't being truly defiant, she was being three, but still) at that point. I was feeling
I do appreciate all the support. And part of my op was in response to the post that's going on over at TAO about the lady in TJ. I posted there that if someone here saw me at the store, most days, they'd come here and complain about how Non-AP, Non-GD I am. Not that I lose it completely, but my patience wears thin, I dont' use a gentle tone all the time, and sometimes, I'm downright harsh. I was pleased that I was able to hold my own temper in check, respect her, and then was completely amazed and awed by how she responded to my being gentle with her. If I'd scolded, "I *told* you to stay with me!" in a harsher tone, it wouldn't have meant anything to her, but because I just allowed her to see my disappointment, she thought about it and we both grew.
I just wanted to share that joy with others. Since my very good IRL friend moved away in January, I don't have much interaction with GD people. And since dh left in early July, I don't have much support either. MDC is where I come when I need to reground myself. I'm surrounded by spankers, cioers, yellers, etc.....and while they only make my convictions stronger, sometimes it can get quite lonely, you know? So,