When my DD was born I remember knowing exactly when it was time to push. However, though I had been good at making sure everyone left me alone (I preferred quiet meditation), at the point when I hit 10 cm's, the midwife and nuse (at hospital birthing center) started to instruct me on the pushing. They were pretty descent in that they let me decide when (as contractions came) but then asked me to push harder and to hold it longer.
Although the birth went fairly smoothly and quickly, I ended up with a fourth degree tear. Now my DD was 8 lbs. 8 oz. and everyone attributes the tear to her size (and especially her big her ... the girl does have a big head
). However, I have been nagged by the feeling that part of the tearing had to do with the force of the pushing and that if I'd been allowed to push as I pleased, things may not have torn as much.
Where I doubt myself is this, everyone keeps telling me that she was such a big baby (who hadn't dropped at all before labor and I wasn't dilated or effaced at all when I got there) that had I not pushed so hard, i would've gotten stuck with a c-section.
I am now pg again and planning my next birth (as much as one can plan these things). I'm torn between wanting to make sure that no one intervenes in the pushing this time and just listening to what I'm told. I would hate to not push hard and then have a c-section - but I'd also like to know if I push more calmly, could I avoid such a big tear?
I know it's a silly concern because it's probably not under my control. However, so many of you have had births without any intervention and i wonder what your experiences are with pushing and tearing, etc. And what would you recommend for me to find a way to resolve this issue in my head before I find myself in labor again (have a bit of time to go - due 3/06).
Sorry I rambled on ... thanks.
-Lisa
Although the birth went fairly smoothly and quickly, I ended up with a fourth degree tear. Now my DD was 8 lbs. 8 oz. and everyone attributes the tear to her size (and especially her big her ... the girl does have a big head
). However, I have been nagged by the feeling that part of the tearing had to do with the force of the pushing and that if I'd been allowed to push as I pleased, things may not have torn as much.Where I doubt myself is this, everyone keeps telling me that she was such a big baby (who hadn't dropped at all before labor and I wasn't dilated or effaced at all when I got there) that had I not pushed so hard, i would've gotten stuck with a c-section.
I am now pg again and planning my next birth (as much as one can plan these things). I'm torn between wanting to make sure that no one intervenes in the pushing this time and just listening to what I'm told. I would hate to not push hard and then have a c-section - but I'd also like to know if I push more calmly, could I avoid such a big tear?
I know it's a silly concern because it's probably not under my control. However, so many of you have had births without any intervention and i wonder what your experiences are with pushing and tearing, etc. And what would you recommend for me to find a way to resolve this issue in my head before I find myself in labor again (have a bit of time to go - due 3/06).
Sorry I rambled on ... thanks.
-Lisa











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