Mothering › Forums › Archives › Pregnancy Archives › May 2006 › if this is your second/or third, or more...
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

if this is your second/or third, or more...  

post #1 of 21
9/12/05 at 1:22pm
Thread Starter 
what are you the most nervous about?

i'm so worried about how i'm going to divide myself and be able to give enough to 2 children. ds is so emotionally needy (as i'm sure most children are) and *so*, so close to me...i'm worried about his future happiness. i'm sure it'll probably work itself out but...i also feel bad that my second child will never know the undivided love that ds knew for 33 months. our second child's life will by default never be quite so close and intimate! i'm sure ds will make sure of it too!
post #2 of 21
9/12/05 at 2:08pm
not having enough patience. For ds's first year, I had (almost) unending patience. I slept very little, and was able to put aside my needs/wants for him. I was able to mother very well, with such little sleep! It amazed me. I think there was something about his littleness and helplessness. On further reflection with DH, we agreed that it also had to do with the fact that ds has different needs now - emotional needs that can push my buttons. I have to work harder on my patience.

I worry that now I will need to do the intense physical mothering, along with mothering a toddler. Will I be able to meet the emotional needs of my toddler (which can be challenging for me), while meeting the challenging physical needs of my infant?
post #3 of 21
9/12/05 at 2:21pm
Thread Starter 
i also worry about that...ds definitely knows my buttons and always pushes them when i'm maxed out as it is. parenting a newborn is about as maxed out as one can get so that totally worries me!?
post #4 of 21
9/12/05 at 3:35pm
Mainly, I'm worried about starting all over again. I was getting to the point with the girla that they were becoming more independent, playing sooo well with each other, etc. Now I will be back to breastfeeding 24/7, getting up at night, not being able to get away much, finding a babysitter for 3 kids. Sheesh, I sound not very excited about this, but I really am. I know that most days I will feel like but I can't wait to hold this newborn, breastfeed her/him, wear him/her, etc. And I can't WAIT to see how Rachel and Emma are going to be, they will be little mother hens!!!
post #5 of 21
9/12/05 at 3:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by starlein26
what are you the most nervous about?

i also feel bad that my second child will never know the undivided love that ds knew for 33 months. our second child's life will by default never be quite so close and intimate! i'm sure ds will make sure of it too!
But, your new baby will have the love of his/her big brother too! I worried about this also, until I could see the relationships among my kids forming, and see what a true blessing that is. And you will do fine too. You will find a way to juggle and balance, and before you know it you all will have settle into a loving routine. I have three little ones, 5 and under, expecting #4 in May. I feel the kids gain so much from being in a big, loving family.
post #6 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:07pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~*max*~
But, your new baby will have the love of his/her big brother too! I worried about this also, until I could see the relationships among my kids forming, and see what a true blessing that is. And you will do fine too. You will find a way to juggle and balance, and before you know it you all will have settle into a loving routine. I have three little ones, 5 and under, expecting #4 in May. I feel the kids gain so much from being in a big, loving family.
thanks! that's incredibly sweet and reassuring!
post #7 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:08pm
Our WHOLE family is SO excited about this baby, so I think that both of my kids will not be jealous of the baby, on the contrary they will want to help. My fear is the whole pain after birth and the recovery. I am just really excited about my kids experiencing the pregnancy and the baby...
post #8 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:14pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ksmommy
My fear is the whole pain after birth and the recovery.
oh....me too. very worried. for me, the pain afterward is almost worse than labor. and the first time around, i didn't even expect it really...i mean i had read about it, but experiencing it was far different! now that i know that...i hope ds understands why mommy is stuck in bed for a few days!
post #9 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:16pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by ksmommy
Our WHOLE family is SO excited about this baby, so I think that both of my kids will not be jealous of the baby, on the contrary they will want to help. My fear is the whole pain after birth and the recovery. I am just really excited about my kids experiencing the pregnancy and the baby...

That's exactly how I feel too, and our kids will all be the same ages!!! :LOL
post #10 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by starlein26
oh....me too. very worried. for me, the pain afterward is almost worse than labor. and the first time around, i didn't even expect it really...i mean i had read about it, but experiencing it was far different! now that i know that...i hope ds understands why mommy is stuck in bed for a few days!

I remember with Rachel the afterbirth pains were HORRENDOUS, and everyone always said how awful it is with each birth, but with Emma I did not have ANY afterbirth pains at all! Weird.. :LOL
post #11 of 21
9/12/05 at 4:50pm
and not to scare everyone, but the more kids you have the worse the recovery.... :
post #12 of 21
9/12/05 at 5:06pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ksmommy
and not to scare everyone, but the more kids you have the worse the recovery.... :
thanks! :
post #13 of 21
9/13/05 at 12:23am
I am worried most about my youngest DD. She is very dependent on me, very anxious, and very attached to nursing. I know she has many months to do a lot of growing. By next spring she most likely will be very different, but I can't help but feel that having to share me with another baby will be hard for her. Poor thing. But I also think that she needs this just as much. .....

ND
post #14 of 21
9/13/05 at 10:27am
The only thing I'm worried about is my family's reaction.

The rest is cake and I can't WAIT!!!! I've always wanted a bigger family.
post #15 of 21
9/13/05 at 10:47am
The only thing I am worried about is my older 2 (who will be ages 3 and 1 when baby is born.. I mean just 3 and 1 lol.. birthdays are 4-12 and 5-2 respectively) wont give me the time to nurse the baby during the day. Evenings we can work it out since my hubby will be home to help but during the day scares me LOL.. I mean, once we get nursing down pat, okay, but those first few weeks when the baby is learning to nurse just FREAKS me out LOL
post #16 of 21
9/13/05 at 11:30am
not sleeping. nursing 24/7. leaky boobs. God I HATED that. LOL.
post #17 of 21
9/13/05 at 12:11pm
I am more worried about being able to give birth with out an epidural I have
had to have them with the last two but it was bc I had to have patosin (IDK spelling)
with my first even though I started labor on my own and with my second they
had to enduce me so with that med it made my contractions alot harder. I am
hoping to go in labor on my own but I am worried that I will have to be enduced
again.
post #18 of 21
9/13/05 at 12:12pm
BTW this is my 3rd child and if you count my step son this is our 4th.
post #19 of 21
9/13/05 at 3:30pm
WHen am i going to sleep???! when am i going to get anything done around the house? those are my biggest concerns. dd was such a terrible sleeper that first year, esp. the first 6 months. naps were whenever she felt like falling asleep, but i rarely could get her to lay down by herself for more than 45 min. at a time. so i would end up holding her so she would sleep longer. now she is pretty good at taking consistent 1 1/2 to 2 hour naps. what if it changes by the time this new baby is born? (and it most likely will) what if the new baby is the same way with sleep? dh works so late most nights that he won't be of much help, i fear. anyway, i just don't see that i will get any sleep or have a clean house for at least 18 months after this baby is born...that is long time to go without clean underware

otherwise i am way more excited about #2 than i thought i would be
post #20 of 21
9/13/05 at 6:08pm
Quote:
Originally posted by strawberryprincess
I just don't see that i will get any sleep or have a clean house for at least 18 months after this baby is born...that is long time to go without clean underwear
You could always buy a few extra packs for everyone .

I've been a big chicken about going for #2 for just about all the same reasons as you all have! DD was a nightmare at night-time, crying for hours on end. If I could have had a guarantee that the new baby will be one of those mellow, easy going angels... I would have gotten pregnant MONTHS ago!

But, I look forward to watching them grow up together !
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: May 2006
This thread is locked  
Mothering › Forums › Archives › Pregnancy Archives › May 2006 › if this is your second/or third, or more...