Teach me about Pushing? - Page 2

[sciencemama]

One thing i didn't realize with my first-- some pushing contractions will be stronger and more productive and others in between will be less obviously effective.

It irritated me to no end to have the nurses make comments like "Oh you did really well on that one" or "That time you didn't quite push in the right place." It was totally involuntary- my uterus was doing all the work and I had nothing to do with it!

Of course, at the time I couldn't verbalize this-- but next time I will have dh silence anyone who tries to say such ridiculous things.

[Belleweather]

Thank you, everyone! That sort of advice was just what I wanted to hear, and was all the sort of advice that I was expecting our 'pushing' class to cover since the birthing center that I'm at has a very comfortable and natural approach. It's been the only part of childbirth class that didn't totally exceed my expectation, so I think it sort of threw me for a loop.

Anyway, what you've told me is a lot closer to what I sort of intuitively expected -- that kind of like any other autonomic body function, my body will probably take over and do what it needs to be doing, which is very, very reassuring!

[Kirsten]

Please don't let anyone count at you! It is ridiculous and disrespectful of the whole birth process. Trust your body. I know that is hard (especially the first time you give birth) but it is so much better.

With dd1 we had a midwife in the hospital. When I was ten cm, I was told to push and did the two breaths in and count on the third, nurse counting. Did this for two and a half hours, feeling ineffective and getting more and more worried. Not really feeling the urge to push but not knowing what it really felt like anyway! FINALLY had her and didn't know any different.

With dd2 we had a different midwife in a freestanding birth center. No checks til I said "I feel a little pushy" so she asked if I wanted her to check me. I did and was 10 and started pushing as my body told me to. It is a physical feeling that you get, and you work with your body. But after a certain point, you couldn't stop if you tried. Think of a sneeze maybe? 14 minutes of pushing and she was born. MUCH better than my first birth - because I was working with my body. NO counting and it was heavenly. My midwife told me I knew what to do; trust my body. SO much more effective! I liken it to someone telling you to go have a bowel movement because they think it is a good time for you to. Could you? No matter how much you pushed? But when your body tells you to, it is easy. Same thing.

With dd3 we had a homebirth with midwives from the birth center attending. No counting then either of course. Really fabulous to trust your body and work with your body and be surrounded by people who feel the same way. Incredible. What every woman should have. Think I pushed twice - maybe three times - and she was posterior!

My advice would be no vaginal checks til YOU feel like you might want to push. I allowed it then to be sure I was a ten, but not sure my body would tell me to push if I shouldn't so maybe that is just a messed up society thing. Also, no counting. I really didn't hold my breath at all when pushing with dd2 and dd3 either. My body did most of the work when I let go and got out of the way. I just pushed along but it was more like riding a wave than having any control over it.

[jeanine123]

I think one of the best ways is to listen to your body whenever possible. If it's telling you to push and you're complete then go ahead and push. If it tells you to wait for a bit, even if you're having a contraction then wait for a bit, it's probably stretching or something. Even if that means pushing every other contraction. For me personally I pushed when I thought I was ready and I did push for about 3 times per contraction. But that was because they were telling me son was in distress and needed to come out now, which he did thank goodness or else it would have been c-sect. I plan to follow my body's signals more this time around though. Also, keep your mouth open and your jaw loose, loose lips up top lead to loose lips down below. And try to pay attention to what it feels like when you try to go to the bathroom when you're constipated or things are moving slowly down there. That's a pretty accurate gauge as to how and what kind of pushing you need to do to get baby out. A great book to read is "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" by Ina May Gaskin. Tons of great birth stories and info, including tips on pushing. Best of luck to you!!!!

[ZeldasMom]

Originally Posted by Belleweather

Well, last week was the how to push class

I am anti- this kind of a thing. I think it's disempowering and not helpful. I think birth prep/support folks would do better to encourage women to listen to their bodies and support them in doing what feels right to them.

Don't worry about birthing the "right" way. Your body will tell you what to do.

[famousmockngbrd]

Originally Posted by alegna

No other mammal has to be taught how to birth- why should we? Don't think about pushing. Your body will let you know what to do.

Did you take a lesson in pooping?

:LOL

Originally Posted by kavamamakava

Don't push the river, let it flow.

Lots of great posts. I found Ina May's Guide to Childbirth really helpful too.