Leaving a cosleeping, nursing 14mo for 4 days? - Page 2

[kaybee]

It sounds to me like you really want to go and you want some reassurance that this could be ok. If taking your son isn’t an option (and it’s true, it would be a completely different trip with him than without him – it could be great, but it’ll be different), then you would have to go 4 days (and 3 nights?) without nursing. That is a long time, but it could be just fine, really. Lots of very attached, nursing moms have to leave their kids for a couple days here and there for work, and they still go on to have great nursing relationships.

I had to leave my son for the first time when he was 16 or 17 months old for a business trip. He was nursing to sleep every night, so I was very concerned. He also nursed every morning, but not much during the day. I was gone for 3 days and 2 nights. Frankly, he was fine. He had a great time with his daddy (and daddy really got to appreciate how much work it is when he leaves for work for weeks!). Our nursing relationship was just as good after I got back as it was when I left.

If you really want to go, you can make it happen. You’ll probably need to pump just to keep from getting engorged. Your kids can have some extra special time with dh who can take care of them in his own special way.

In the end, it’s up to you, and you should definitely go with what feels comfortable to you, but I don't think it's mission impossible.

Good luck with a tough choice!

Karen

[oceanbaby]

Thanks for the continued thoughts on this. A pp poster was right, that I'm not feeling very good about it. And I don't see myself making this trip. I'm sad about it, but I just don't think I could enjoy myself. I think the first time I'm away from ds2 I need to be a little closer by just in case.

However, I am thinking about nightweaning. I have been thinking about this for awhile, and struggling with guilt over it as I didn't nightwean ds1 until he was 2yo. But he was a much different child.

I really hate that this is the kind of thing I think about when thinking about having a third. Here I am, counting down the months until I get a little bit of my freedom back, and then I wonder if we should start all over again.

[Black Orchid]

I think it varies for every child and only you can know whether you can go or not... I come from a slightly different perspective, as I left my DD at that same age for 3 nights for the first time. I work and it was a business trip that I could not get out of.

She is at home with my DH (who is a SAHD) and they have a very good attachment and while at the time she was still nursing all night and I expected it to be a nightmare for the two of them... it ended up being just fine. She cuddled with my DH at night in our bed and when she woke up to nurse, her was able to quickly soothe her with back rubs and singing and water from a sippy cup to help her thirst. Maybe it was a lucky break, but I don't think it was... she was and still is a very attached but high-needs child and nurses 3-5 times a day.

My supply was not affected at all. I pumped twice a day (I didn't get anything if I pumped more than that) and even though I desperately missed her and was sooooo glad to be home, it was a good feeling to know that my DH could meet her needs as well as I could. I was still nursing her on demand at that point, as I work from home and she visits my office whenever she needs me.

Anyway, just sharing my perspective, which is definately different than others on this thread. Not saying what is right or wrong for you (or anyone else)... just thought you might like to hear what happened for us.