Yeah, or throw a big towel onto the floor and let her pour... it's just water, really.
When my daughter was little (and I was most active on the TCS list when she was 3-5; I haven't been on it now for years) her wants were simpler. It was more about offering alternatives that were more acceptable to me, and than she would chose one that she liked better than what she was doing that I didn't like. I also did a lot of creative problem solving... I think there was a 6 month period when I didn't change her diapers when she was lying down, because she hated that. I got good at changing her while she was standing, and for poopy diapers I'd stand her in the bathtub and swish her off while she played with the water.
Communication with a young child is generally not about words as much, but about actions...
|Isn't it dp's responsibility to help your child develop self-control, a very important skill that takes lots and lots of practice to master.
I don't think controlling a child is the most effective way to help her learn self-control... I mean, feeding a child isn't the best way to help them learn self-feeding, right?
TCS children learn what is modeled. They see their parents working to find non-coercive, mutually-agreeable solutions, and they pick up these values. The youngest TCS kids are often amazing problem-solvers, because they're so used to this as a way to resolve issues.
TCS children have control over their own actions, unlike most children, and therefore they always have self-control. Because they're controlling their own actions, they can see directly the effects these actions have on others and the world.