Standing on Chairs

[grumo]

Do you have any rules regarding standing on chairs?

We have been discouraging dd from standing on chairs, even though we have her stand on a chair to wash her hands and to help us cook.

I asked a friend how she handles standing on chairs, and she just lets her son do it. He's fallen a couple of times, but he has become an expert balancer. She stays close, but she doesn't hover around him making sure her doesn't fall.

Honestly, not having a rule against standong on the chairs never crossed my mind before! It amazes me when I realized how deeply engrained some assumptions are!

What do other people think? Do your kids stand on chairs?

And then, one of the next logical steps for me is do you let your kid on the table? DD always wants to crawl onto the table to get whatever it is she stood on the chair in the first place for. I'm less worried about safety when it comes to the table, frankly, I don't want her on the table.

Do you let your kid on the table?

Thanks

[sozobe]

I've found that toddler logic doesn't do so well with "sometimes this is OK, sometimes it's not." So since dd stands on chairs sometimes (to help with cooking etc.,) it's OK to stand on chairs -- but she knows she has to be careful.

She's just not allowed on the table, though. It's higher, there's a light fixture overhead she could bonk her head on, etc.

[oceanbaby]

I let ds stand on a chair next to me in the kitchen, and am careful to always have a hand near him. He's never fallen, but I'm still not ready to let him stand there without me nearby. It really hasn't been an issue anywhere else in the house. As far as crawling on the table goes, our dining room table is usually too covered with crap for him to crawl on.: But if it isn't, and he wants to crawl on it, I let him while I hold onto him. He knows that this isn't something we do anywhere else though.

[angelfromalasaka]

both my kids stand on chairs. the only rule i have is that we dont sit, stan on the dining room table, they have a little table that is allowed.they also stand climb ect on the couch bed ect. We teach them its ok here, ask at someones house.
angel mom to grace 3.5 and drew 2

[Aster]

Yup!

DS stands on chairs and 'helps' in the kitchen. He's at a climbing stage and will try to get up onto and balance on anything he can. It's so cute and he's always so proud of himself. He hasnt tried to get onto the table yet, but it's strong and wooden and i wouldnt see a problem with it unless we were having a meal at the time :LOL.

He's getting a set of playstands for noel and i cant wait to see him climb all over them.

He's our little mountain goat!!ildild

Seriously though, i once had a very wise friend who said that kids will fall when their parent says hey be careful dont fall. Until the parent introduces the possibility of failure, the child only has success in their mind. Thought gives birth to action and self-fulfilling prophecies happen all the time. I think it's important to empower children and encourage them to explore. It's amazing what an innate sense of balance little people have

[reesa]

DD is also at the climbing stage and tries to scale anything - bookcases, chairs, tables. We let her on the chairs, she is very steady and I find she only gets wobbly if I'm obviously hovering. She fell off last night, picked herself back up and tried again, so she obviously wasn't that deterred!

We also let her on the table as long as she doesn't stand or climb up when people are eating. She knows the deal and most of the time sticks to it.

[Dodo]

This is a very timely discussion for me. My dd learned to climb chairs one week ago. I think my stance will be: chairs are ok, tables are not. How does that sound?

She already had one very dramatic fall involving two chairs, another toddler, the refrigerator and her head.

I totally agree with the assertion that telling a child to be careful can cause them to fall. I try to bite my tongue, but man is it ever hard.

I'm relieved to hear that all kids go through a climbing stage. I had never heard of it and thought that my daughter might be some kind of hyperactive mutant.

[Sahara]

Ha Ha, I was thinking when I read this title, 'Huh?' I always let him stand on the chairs. And the table and countertops are off limits. Except the coffetable. We battled that for 2 months. And one day we realized, what the heck do we care if he stands on the coffee table? So we sat down in front of the coffee table and said "From now on it's ok if you want to stand on the coffee table!" and plopped him up on it. It's been two weeks, and he hasn't been on the coffee table in almost a week!

[Dodo]

Okay, so dd just spent the entire morning on the coffee table. My new rule is: no standing on the dining room table. Sometimes I feel like the most permissive mom around. I find very few battles worth the effort. Guess I'm non-confrontational.

[feebeeglee]

not on the table, please

I spent a MONTH at least saying "Don't climb on the coffee table get off the coffee table we don't climb on the coffee table CIVILIZED PEOPLE DON'T CLIMB ON THE COFFEE TABLE!" before my mom was visiting and calmly told both girls, "Only hands on the coffee table. No feet." They have maybe done it twice since then and that was in late October.

Dang, she's good.

Phoebe, APd daughter of very wise and kind Annette
and AP mom to Faith (2), Abaigeal(1), and Bede (EDD 3/15/03)

[PumpkinSeeds]

I allow my ds to climb on chairs, except when we are eating. Then he must sit down. Tables are off limits too. Oh and sitting is required when in the bathtub.


ITA:

Originally posted by Dodo
I find very few battles worth the effort.

[grumo]

Am I crazy? i let dd stand in the bathtub. It isn't a slippery bottom and she hasn't really slipped or anything.

[PumpkinSeeds]

THe reason I worry about the bathtub is that faucet and the sliding doors. If he slipped and fell on the faucet or fell and hit his head on the railing for the sliding door, I don't think I could handle it. It would really really hurt and I don't want him to end up fearing the bathtub since he loves the water so much.

So in a word, yes, I think you're crazy for letting your babe stand in the tub.

[Sahara]

grumo, if you're crazy, I'm right there with you. DS takes his entire bath standing. We pour water over him with a little bucket to rinse him off!

[Dot.mom]

DD stands on chairs to help in the kitchen, but when she starts climbing all over the furniture for the thrill, I know it;s time to head to the park.

[Embee]

This thread has made me realize that perhaps I'm not so "consistent" as I thought I was! I allow DS to stand on chairs to play at the sink and help me in the kitchen. However, I'm always telling him to sit down on his chair ("or you could fall or get hurt...") when he stands on it during dinner! WOOOPS!

I guess I'm always worried at dinner time because he's not just standing on his chair, but his booster seat which is tied down but still not so stable as a plain chair. He loves to get me with this one though--stands up and does a little dance to "taunt" me! It's so darn cute, I have a hard time not laughing. Kid's got some pretty wiggly hips!

Anyway, I guess it's just my "dinner time standards" that differ? Sometimes I think I should just let go on this one--he's a toddler, wiggly and naturally not willing to sit still for very long. Any thoughts on this????

[Moooommy]

While toddlers aren't great at noting difference in situation, we've found it useful to designate one chair (a lower, more stable chair) that he can push around and use to get up to see what's going on on the counter. The "blue" chairs (dining chairs) or any others, for that matter, are not for standing on. DS2 is doing very well with that, but we also are using the key strategy of telling what he may do:

NO "No standing!"

YES "We use the white chair for standing" or "We sit at the table" Physical redirection/guidance is appropriate at this age, gently (re)seating them, etc.

Yes, they are trying at this age, aren't they? Wouldn't trade it for the world!

[mamalisa]

My ds has to sit on the counter to help cook. If I am online he sits next to me on a chair or on the table. I don't let him stand on chairs, I guess mostly because then he can get stuff that is up away from him on purpose. If he does climb up on a chair all I have to tell him is he could hurt his head, poor kid hates when he hurts his head, so he gets down right away.

[Embee]

*update*

I pulled off the booster seat and am now allowing DS to stand on the kitchen chairs whenever he likes... even at mealtime... I find this keeps him at the table longer and perhaps even more food gets in. Without the booster seat on the chair, it's much safer for him to stand and also get up and down (like, a thousand times!!) during meals!

Problem (and inconsistency) solved! Too easy...

[sozobe]

Yay! May all parenting issues be resolved so smoothly...