Working and worried

[Arien]

For the past two years I have had a part-time job at a university. It's been really really great for me because number one, I got to spend four full days a week with my son for the past two years and number two, I was still able to work on my career, and number three it's at a university and so I have good benefits and rights.

I did a good job at my job and so the employers want me full time. I start full-time next week. And I'm dreading it. Working part time was perfect, my partner had to work a lot more to be able to barely make ends meet financially, but I could spend most of the time with our child and away from the home only three days a week.

I fear as though once I start fulltime I'll never be able to go back to part-time work. I feel as though my university job is too good to leave because of the dental, vision etc coverage...but what I really want to do is be home with my son!!!!!!!!

I can't figure out how to make any money from home, I know I won't be happy being away full-time from my son and I basically don't know what to do.

My partner works at a job that has no predictablity, and doesn't make enough money to sustain us three if I don't work. My son is also in nursery school in the mornings for socialization with other kids...I just don't know what I could possibly to do to be at home.

[aprilushka]

Will they not let you continue part time? Can you negotiate for that?

Alternatively, does your university have any kind of flex day system where you can work an extra hour each day you are at work then get a day off? I get this every other week. I may someday negotiate to get less pay and get every Fri off (one woman who is very senior was able to get every Wednesday off) when I'm better established and DH has a more steady income. Or maybe try negotiating for it if they don't have that kind of program. A lot of institutional type of places do have flex programs, so if you haven't asked, I definitely would, if you feel you can't negotiate for part time.

[Arien]

The fact that my job was part-time for two years was what I was able to negotiate. I did a good job at my job, and so they wanted me fulltime. Maybe I shouldn't have done such a good job.....??
I'll look into that flex thing you mentioned, I'm just depressed now about the prospect of being roped into this job that I'm not motivated to do anymore, but have to do it for the money, miss my son constantly, and wish this wasn't the way life turned out.

[fire_lady]

for you mama. Hope things will be better.

[aprilushka]

Is it possible you can find similar part time work elsewhere? If all you need is the same amount of money you've been making from your part time job there may be some other part time job out there so you can continue the schedule you have been on.
I also would like to stay at home at least during these early years, but it makes a lot more sense in our family for my DH to do it. I'm rather jealous of him sometimes, but I know the reverse situation would be far more stressful for everyone in the end. Having two Fridays off a month makes it a lot easier, though.

[Qestia]

I work for a university too and love the atmosphere and benefits. I actually work full time but work at home 2 days a week. Would your employer be interested in that? Alternatively if they want a full-time person in this job could you "job share" with someone--maybe there's another mom out there who would like to do your job 2 days a week. One thing I was also considering if my employer decides they need me in the office 5 days a week is to stagger my hours and work say, 7-2 (working thru lunch) instead of 9-5 so that my son isn't in daycare 40 hours a week.

[Arien]

Originally Posted by aprilushka

Is it possible you can find similar part time work elsewhere? If all you need is the same amount of money you've been making from your part time job there may be some other part time job out there so you can continue the schedule you have been on.
I also would like to stay at home at least during these early years, but it makes a lot more sense in our family for my DH to do it. I'm rather jealous of him sometimes, but I know the reverse situation would be far more stressful for everyone in the end. Having two Fridays off a month makes it a lot easier, though.

Thing is I feel trapped at the university and not able to leave because I get dental, vision health benefits (my partner's job has none of those), it's very difficult to find a similat job in field somewhere else because the field I work in usually jobs don't have benefits. I'm a lucky one that way. I wouldn't mind part-time work, as it's been that way for the past 2 years, but the prospect of full time (whish starts next week) is so horrible to me I can't fathom it. I almost feel like having another baby, taking the year off of paid maternity benefits and quitting when I had to go back......Qestia great idea re: staggering your hours....

Thanks everyone for replying to this thread