Cesaren Section Support Thread October 2005 - Page 2

[Storm Bride]

Karen: Welcome! You're in the same boat as me that way. The jury's still out on baby number four. DH is very reluctant to go through another pregnancy with me, and I can't blame him. My emotional state with my last was pretty ugly. I just don't seem to be able to wrap myself around my sections.

I'd originally intended to get a midwife and try for HBA3C with my next...but now I'm having second thoughts. For the first time, I'm realy starting to think about the possibility of UR. I know it goes up with each section, and I'm not exactly young. My next would definitely be my last, and I just couldn't bear to lose it due to my birthing choice. (I'm not saying that I'd be okay with losing any baby, of course...I don't know if I'm expressing this well...just can't quite imagine deciding to go ahead with my last baby and then losing it because I was so hellbent on experiencing a natural birth...I don't really think that would happen, but...what if??) Maybe I really need to get my mindset into "at least I have my babies"...

[turtlewomyn]

Just looking in to see what the future brings. I am 5 days post C/S (due to fetal macrosomia possibly caused by undiagnosed gestational diabetes, it was scheduled and a difficult decision to make) and doing pretty well. DD and I are getting the hang of nursing. On Thursday in frustration I asked DH to get me a bottle of formula (we have a million and one samples that he hid in case of an emergency) He told me no! He is so great, he knows I wouldn't forgive myself, and hey, things are much better now! (I put in a call to the DOH because they had someone visit in the hospital and said they provide free lac. consultants that come to your house. I left a message and they never called me back! Thank goodness we got through it on our own).
I cry from time to time about my lost natural birth, but for the most part I am just busy enjoying my new daughter!

[chantald]

Hi Karen! Welcome. I will most likely also be planning a c/s birth when we decide it is time for our next child. I just can't put myself through another birth that doesn't end in a vaginal birth again..

Hi Kristen! Congratulations on the birth of your daughter!! Be easy on yourself! Give yourself time to heal and to grieve. Don't hold it in.. find someone who will understand and listen. Allow yourself to forgive yourself. Many s for you!

Chantal

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by Peppermint

Does anyone else have major tenderness at ovulation? It started after my second c-section, when I ovulate, my lower abdomen is soooo tender, it's not like the egg passing through the tube, it is much lower down, thoughts? I mentioned it to my Dr. prior to my last pregnancy, and he offered to put me on the pill : .

Your ovaries and tubes are actually much farther down than you might think. I always felt it when I ovulated (it's called "mittleschmertz" or "middle pain"), from the very first time. Only my mother believed me, because she had always felt it, too. The pain was *very* low, about even with my hip socket, usually unilateral and somewhere between my hip and belly button. It's hard to describe the position, but I could point to it. Lots of women feel it when they ovulate, but the majority don't.

I can think of lots of plausible explanations as to why you might be more sensitive to the pain of ovulation after a c-section. I don't think that it's anything to worry about, unless the pain is debilitating. For me, it was usually some achiness surrounding a sharp pain; the achiness could last up to eight hours, the sharp pain was usually 45 minutes or less. I haven't felt ovulation since my son's birth, though; I think that my body was just less sensitive to the hormones and the pain after the hellish ordeal that brought my son into the world. :LOL

[Ben's Mommy]

Originally Posted by Peppermint

Does anyone else have major tenderness at ovulation? It started after my second c-section, when I ovulate, my lower abdomen is soooo tender, it's not like the egg passing through the tube, it is much lower down, thoughts?

I think it would be nice to have a signal for when you ovulate! Not that the pain or tenderness would be fun. But it would be great for either birth control or if you are trying to get pregnant!

[Peppermint]

I do find it useful now that I am avoiding pregnancy, but when I was TTC #3, it was really painful to have sex during that time. My main concern is wondering if it signals a problem that I should know about.

[Monkeyfeet]

Hi everyone!
New here with a question if you all don't mind!

I had dd by c-section a year ago. Ever since then if I bend over for too long, it hurts to straighten myself back up. I have to do it VERY slowly.

Normal? I would appreciate any ideas!

Thanks so much!

[mommy2girlies]

welcome monkeyfeet, karen, and kristin!! kristin congrats on your new little one!

monkeyfeet~do you think it might be from the epidural or spinal they gave you? i know that that happens for me, but i have a yucky back anyway..herniated disk, displaced sciatic nerve.... : or maybe its from bending over to pick up your baby bundle..my doc says you're supposed to bend w/ your knees like when you pick up a box..HELLO! when im swooping up my little one, i never think of doing that way...oh well...

we've been toying w/ the idea of having a third, but i really want another vaginal birth! i've had one of each now and carson's c-section delivery was from the cord being wrapped around her neck twice and causing decel's w/ every cntxn, so im a good candidate for a vbac...but in MS they don't really do those...and they don't have birthing centers or midwives near me. there's a midwife about 2 hrs north of me and a center that will do a more natural birth 2hrs east of me...i spent all day yesterday on the computer trying to find legislation information that would tell me that vbacs are either frowned upon but you could find a dr. to do one, or if they're just flat out illegal...its kinda frustrating!

kelly

[dlm194]

Kelly (Monkeyfeet) ~ I had a c-s a year ago and in Aug, my back suddenly started hurting really bad. I went to the chiro (who has always helped me before) and nothing! I went to my regular doc and I got meds but they didn't help so I stopped taking them. I finally started in physical therapy a couple weeks ago and that's been helping. Apparently, my muscles were very weak, leading to the pain. I really wonder if it was related to the epidural though.

[cdenuccio]

how do you make a "birth" out of a cesarean?

Hi!

I am 22 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child. My first 2 were amazing homebirths and I'd do that again in a sec, except for 4th degree tears following both (including hospital transfers and a 3 day stay after baby 2 b/c of blood pressure issues, but anyway...)

So I'm exploring my birth options for this baby's birth, consulting my midwives, a few OBs, you all... Still no firm decision but as I explore the idea of having a c/s, I'm deeply concerned with having/creating a birth experience that is beautiful and memorable, one I can happily tell to this wee one inside me.

What can I do to help create that experience? Is it even possible? What experiences did you Mamas have? Did anyone do anything ahead of time --or at the time-- that really enhanced the surgery into a BIRTH? Thanks for your help and ideas. My 2 toddlers are currently wreaking havoc so I'll check back and write more when I can.

Cara

[Heavenly]

Hi I have had c-sections with both of my children and I am currently 5 months pregnant with #3. A brief rundown of my story - I was going with midwifes and planning a homebirth with my DS. I got pre-eclampsia and HELLP at 34 weeks and he was born by emergeny c-section. We both almost died and I honestly have no emotional upset about that c-section, it was SO obviously necessary. With my DD I was planning a home VBAC with the same midwives. I laboured at home for 25 hours but my water broke with tons of meconium in it so we headed to the hospital. Once I was there I got an epidural because she was posterior and I had been having back labour for 25 hours, I just couldn't take it any more. Once I got the epidural her heart rate dropped alot but it WAS starting to recover. The OB on call was against midwives and home VBACs so he immediately started bullying me into a c-section. He said if I didn't have a c-section right away my baby would die and I was scared so I listened. I know now her c-section wasn't necessary, the records say she was born vigourous. Her 1 minute apgar was only 6 so maybe she was a bit in distress but I still feel it wasn't necesssary. I had severe PPD after her birth because of having set myself up so much for a VBAC and ending up with a c-section. I heal very easily from my c-sections it seems. I was up and shopping within a week of their births and by 4 weeks I felt pretty much back to normal.

Right now I have been planning a VBAC with midwives at an Ottawa hospital (that is my only option) but there is a part of me that is still seriously considering scheduling a c-section. After 2 c-sections I know my chances of another one are probably 30%. The idea of going through all that labour and setting my hopes so high on a VBAC only to end up with a c-section again is devastating to me. I know the PPD after Olivia was because I had spent hours and hours planning the perfect VBAC and when it didn't happen I just totally lost it. Yes I want a vaginal birth but I think I might be romantacizing it in my mind. I see the births where people seem to barely feel pain and deliver with no tearing and I want that. But that isn't the average woman's birth. And what if I tear really badly? I will still have severe pain to recover from and it will be a place that I really don't want to feel pain! I know that is totally lame but at least a c-section is a known to me. I know physically I recover well from them and if I planned one hopefully I would feel better about it emotionally too. And I do have to admit the risk of rupture scares me too. I would never forgive myself if I lost my baby just for the sake of a vaginal birth. I just keep thinking that I can't plan a c-section because then I will never experience vaginal birth. But what if I do everything just to end up with a c-section anyways? I wish I could know what my chances of succeeding really are but nothing can be predicted before it actually happens. For other people who have decided to plan c-sections for subsequent children how did you let go of the goal of a vaginal birth? And do you think I will regret it if I plan a c-section? I feel the baby moving in me and I feel like a "normal" pregnant person - one who will be waiting for that first contraction and going into labour and then delivering my baby. This baby is actually head down as opposed to my other two and I wonder if that's a sign I should go with a vaginal birth. If I plan a c-section I feel like I will never get to join that "club." You know the one I'm talking about - people treat you as if because you had c-sections you had it the easy way. I actually had someone ask me today why I wanted a vaginal birth and then she said, "After 3 vaginal births the only way I will have another child is if they let me schedule a c-section." People seem to think that a c-section is so easy compared to vaginal birth. I've never actually had a vaginal birth but I really don't see how that could be true. Okay I've rambled long enough, any input into my situation is appreciated.

[ChattyCat]

Hi, everyone! My name is Cat. I had ds via csec in Feb 04. I'm pregnant with our next babe. His csec was totally necessary. I pushed in every imaginable position while in excruciating pain for over 6 hours, and we know he wasn't malpositioned. He was stuck at +1 position, and when they pulled him out, he had a cone head that looked just like the inside of my pelvis! We had a very supportive birth team, and a vaginal birth just wasn't meant to be.

I've decided that with this babe, I'm going to schedule a 39 week csec. We've moved and the people here are not so supportive of VBACs, and honestly I'm not sure if I would want one anyway. I can't imagine having to recover from another csec after a traumatic labor, especially with a toddler running around the house.

How do I make this the best experience I can? Last time I was so focused on a natural, vaginal birth. Even though my main goal was healthy mom/healthy baby, and I got that, it took me a long time to process my grief over not having a vaginal birth. This time, I'd like to be okay with the birth. And, just know that it is the best experience it can be. Is there a way to make a surgical birth about the birth?

[Ben's Mommy]

Originally Posted by cdenuccio

What can I do to help create that experience? Is it even possible? What experiences did you Mamas have? Did anyone do anything ahead of time --or at the time-- that really enhanced the surgery into a BIRTH?
Cara

I had an unplanned c-sec, but have also been looking into scheduled positive c-sec experience for my next birth. I haven't tested these ideas, but here is what I've read that other women have obtained for their c-sec's. I've heard of women who were able to either have the screen lowered or a mirror positioned to see the actual birth. Having their dp with them at all times (even while the epi or spinal is placed). Some women were able to have their dp take pictures of the actual birth. Others have done anything from a spa day before to bringing their own pillow to the OR to be more comfortable. Some were able to recover in their own room with the baby. I'm trying to negotiate a few of these things with my OB, but it all depends on the hospital and your OB, so I would try and have them in your birth plan somewhere. Hope this helps.

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by Heavenly

I would never forgive myself if I lost my baby just for the sake of a vaginal birth. I just keep thinking that I can't plan a c-section because then I will never experience vaginal birth. But what if I do everything just to end up with a c-section anyways?

I feel the baby moving in me and I feel like a "normal" pregnant person - one who will be waiting for that first contraction and going into labour and then delivering my baby. This baby is actually head down as opposed to my other two and I wonder if that's a sign I should go with a vaginal birth. If I plan a c-section I feel like I will never get to join that "club." You know the one I'm talking about - people treat you as if because you had c-sections you had it the easy way.

Oh, my - this sounds so very much like me. I want to experience a vaginal birth so badly it almost makes me insane.

My VBA2C attempt didn't work out. I ended up going in for a scheduled section, and it's really messed me up in some ways. But, by pushing for a VBA2C, I did put off my section by three weeks and went into labour before the surgery. DS2 seemed much better off at birth than his sister did. He didn't have her breathing difficulties and my colostrum and milk both came in more quickly. If I do have a fourth, and don't try for a VBA3C (a possibility - it's going to take a war to pull one off), I'll definitely wait until labour again. I'd never have another scheduled section unless there was a real, valid, medical reason for one...not just medical convenience.

And, yes - I hate the whole "easy way out" attitude. Being told you cheated (someone said this to me a month or so ago) when you've just gone through hell to get out of it...not fun.

[Ben's Mommy]

Originally Posted by Heavenly

And I do have to admit the risk of rupture scares me too. I would never forgive myself if I lost my baby just for the sake of a vaginal birth. I just keep thinking that I can't plan a c-section because then I will never experience vaginal birth. But what if I do everything just to end up with a c-section anyways? I wish I could know what my chances of succeeding really are but nothing can be predicted before it actually happens. For other people who have decided to plan c-sections for subsequent children how did you let go of the goal of a vaginal birth? And do you think I will regret it if I plan a c-section?

Heavenly - you just summed up what I think is going thru all the minds of women with c-secs. We ALL want to experience vaginal births, and know what it is like to have an easy delivery....unfortunately we can't predict the future, and our future deliveries. And as far as c-sec being easier than vaginal births - you will most likely only hear that from women who have NOT had c-secs. A c-sec takes way more time to recover from than normal V-births. As far as wether or not to schedule a repeat c-sec or try for a VBAC, that is entirely a personal decision that is up to you. You have to come to that decision on your own terms, weighing out all the risks. For me, a scheduled repeat c-sec is the only way I am comfortable birthing. I can not leave the hospital again without a baby. The possibility of rupture is just too much for me, even if it is a small percent. So now, I'm just researching all the information possible on how to have a "good" c-sec experience. I hope with reading thru all the posts, and researching your options, that you are able to come to a decision that you are comfortable with. I wish the best of luck to you and your pending decisions.

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by Ben's Mommy

And as far as c-sec being easier than vaginal births - you will most likely only hear that from women who have NOT had c-secs. A c-sec takes way more time to recover from than normal V-births.

I'm still here. A section can be easier, and have a shorter, easier recovery; I experienced it myself. I'd never call it cheating to have a c-section, but it's not always the most difficult route (physically) when it comes to childbirth.

[Ben's Mommy]

Originally Posted by eilonwy

I'm still here. A section can be easier, and have a shorter, easier recovery; I experienced it myself. I'd never call it cheating to have a c-section, but it's not always the most difficult route (physically) when it comes to childbirth.

Sorry. I do realize that there are V-births that are WAY hard to recover from and c-sec births that are realatively easy to recover from, but on the most part, from what I've heard, it's the other way around.
Now why can't birth just be easy in general for the mom and baby!? It would make it a lot easier to care for a newborn if you are all well and peppy!

[turtlewomyn]

Originally Posted by cdenuccio

What can I do to help create that experience? Is it even possible? What experiences did you Mamas have? Did anyone do anything ahead of time --or at the time-- that really enhanced the surgery into a BIRTH? Thanks for your help and ideas. My 2 toddlers are currently wreaking havoc so I'll check back and write more when I can.

I had a scheduled c-section just last week. I had a nice birth plan written out for a natural hypnobirth. When we made the decision to schedule the c-section based on the doctors recommendations I was really upset about losing my birth, but we gave the baby one weekend to come out on her own (she was a big baby, possibly due to missed gestational diabetes and was showing no signs of coming on her own, even past my due date). I also spent that weekend thinking about how to make the birth better.

- DH took photos of her birth, they are gory, and I don't know that I would share them with anyone, but they are good to have. I had no desire to be able to see the birth myself, seeing my body open like that at the time would have been terrible.
- At our hospital, the baby is checked over after the csection, then brought around for mom to see, I kissed her, and told her I loved her and then DH brought her back to our room. I was back in that room within an hour of her birth. My MIL and SFIL were there, but I had told DH that I wanted to hold the baby before anyone (non-medical staff) other than him had a chance to hold her, so they waited to hold her. I had her nursing within an hour after birth (which isn't easy when you cannot feel your lower half of your body!). DH took lots of pictures of everything that I missed (weighing, etc.)

Good luck with your decisions. I don't have a natural birth to compare it to, but it didn't feel as terrible as I thought it would, so I think we did a good job of making it into a "birth"

[turtlewomyn]

Originally Posted by Storm Bride

And, yes - I hate the whole "easy way out" attitude. Being told you cheated (someone said this to me a month or so ago) when you've just gone through hell to get out of it...not fun.

I am sorry that someone said that to you, how horrible. So far, I have been having a good recovery from my c/s (from what I can tell) but I think it would be easier to care for my daughter if I didn't have trouble climbing in and out of bed, and wasn't feeling pain at my incision site every time I rock her too much.
I have been compared to Britney Spears twice now since the decision to have a scheduled csection, including by my father who thought he was being funny and told me I needed to get a sense of humor (this was via phone, and DH who was with me overhearing all this kept telling my dad to shut up under his breath). People are so insensitive!

[mommy2girlies]

Originally Posted by turtlewomyn

I had a scheduled c-section just last week. I had a nice birth plan written out for a natural hypnobirth. When we made the decision to schedule the c-section based on the doctors recommendations I was really upset about losing my birth, but we gave the baby one weekend to come out on her own (she was a big baby, possibly due to missed gestational diabetes and was showing no signs of coming on her own, even past my due date). I also spent that weekend thinking about how to make the birth better.

- DH took photos of her birth, they are gory, and I don't know that I would share them with anyone, but they are good to have. I had no desire to be able to see the birth myself, seeing my body open like that at the time would have been terrible.
- At our hospital, the baby is checked over after the csection, then brought around for mom to see, I kissed her, and told her I loved her and then DH brought her back to our room. I was back in that room within an hour of her birth. My MIL and SFIL were there, but I had told DH that I wanted to hold the baby before anyone (non-medical staff) other than him had a chance to hold her, so they waited to hold her. I had her nursing within an hour after birth (which isn't easy when you cannot feel your lower half of your body!). DH took lots of pictures of everything that I missed (weighing, etc.)

Good luck with your decisions. I don't have a natural birth to compare it to, but it didn't feel as terrible as I thought it would, so I think we did a good job of making it into a "birth"

this is exactly how my c-section went...it wasn't planned or scheduled but it happened that way anyway and i guess as sections go it wasn't horrible, but i did miss seeing my oldest meet her new little sister. i have tons of pictures of it, but its not the same. im pushing for a vbac for #3. im not pregnant yet, but we're planning on it. since i've had both a vaginal birth and a c-sec. im a good candidate for a vbac, but my state isn't the most forward thinking (MS)...we'll see what happens..