Cesaren Section Support Thread October 2005 - Page 3

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by turtlewomyn

I am sorry that someone said that to you, how horrible. So far, I have been having a good recovery from my c/s (from what I can tell) but I think it would be easier to care for my daughter if I didn't have trouble climbing in and out of bed, and wasn't feeling pain at my incision site every time I rock her too much.

I've had good recoveries, I think - although my incision got infected this time, and that wasn't a lot of fun. Some of that is psychological, though. The gap where the infection was wouldn't heal until the infection was gone. So, it started to feel as though I was going to have an open incision forever...

That was my third section. In terms of the immediate recovery (ie. getting back on my feet and mobile), I do better every time. I was ready to try getting out of bed in just a few hours this time (I didn't actually get up until my catheter was out, though). But, it seems as though it takes longer to get completely over it everytime. With ds1, I was all over the place and feeling 100%...well, maybe 95% at the end of the 6 weeks. With dd, I was more-or-less the same, except that I had intermittent pain at one side for months. With ds2, I just don't seem to be springing back. I'm mobile and not having a lot of pain, but the muscles still seem to be weak, and I'm just not back to normal. He's 2.5 months old, and I'm only about 70-75%, imo.

However, I don't know how much of that is the effect of multiple abdominal surgeries, how much is because I'm 12 years older than I was with my first, and how much is because we moved soon after the section, and I have a toddler now...it's been a lot more work.

I'd still like to try for a VBA3C...but I don't think it's going to happen. I doubt I can find a care-provider, and I'm definitely not willing to UBAC. And, now I'm finding the thought of rupture is starting to freak me out. I'll be getting my tubes done after the next one (if I have another one), and I think that losing my baby and my ability to have any more children all at once would probably put me over the edge. So...maybe I'm going to have to give up on the idea of a vaginal birth. And, hopefully, I won't go to jail for assault when someone tells me that I cheated or took the easy way out...

[OnTheFence]

Message From Kim, the Cesarean Goddess

Hi Everyone,

I know I have been away for awhile now. Things, well have been hectic. We did the whole Hurricane thing again, but we were tremedously blessed that we had no damage to our home this time. We had a house full, fed lots of folks, and my husband went to the severely damaged parts in our area to volunteer and hand out clothing.

I'm nearly 16 weeks post csection. I've been very happy with my post recovery, even though I will say this recovery was different. Not bad, just different. I suppose because this was my third csection. I have a very happy baby, who is nursing great and growing up way too fast. She had a very bad bout of whooping cough (I talk about this in my blog) and we are all just getting back to normal.

In other news, I am writing up some ideas for a Cesarean Goddess site. It may take time to get going, but its something I definitely want to do.

I'm also in the two week wait and see thing because we had a condom break. Not cool! Evidently the morning after pill or Plan B contraception is out of the question when you are exclusively nursing. : We've also been talking about the possibility of another child, my husband way more than me. I think he's lost his mind though.

I am now going to try and read the whole OCt. Support thread and see what is up with you girls.

Kim

[Storm Bride]

Kim - good to see you! I'm glad everybody's through the whooping cough scare. That's one vaccine I'd get without hesitation, even if the doctors didn't push it. Scary stuff.

Reading the whole thread will take a while. I'm still bitching and whining a lot, but I"m awfully glad this thread is here.

[Ben's Mommy]

Kim - It's great to hear from you. I just barely got to meet you before your hiatus. I've read some pp of yours including your birth plan and you have given me a LOT of good ideas for my birthing future. I look forward to getting to know you better and I'm glad your family is doing well post-hurricane! By the way, I LOVE your idea of a cesarean goddess web page! Look forward to browsing thru it when you are done.
(You are more than welcome to take over the thread at the beginning of each month - I took the liberty of doing it while you were away.) Welcome Back!

[cdenuccio]

Thank you to those who've given me their ideas so far for creating a birth in a c/s! This is so out of my experience that I don't even know what to want. Did anyone have a c/s birth plan? Did anyone who knew they'd have a c/s wait til they were in labor to go in for the surgery? I'm thinking of that, both for the baby's health (labor hormones and such) and just to let her/him pick her own bday.

thanks again for the input. I really appreciate it all and welcome more!

Cara

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by cdenuccio

Did anyone who knew they'd have a c/s wait til they were in labor to go in for the surgery? I'm thinking of that, both for the baby's health (labor hormones and such) and just to let her/him pick her own bday.

I sort of did that. I had a scheduled c/s, but I'd been fighting it for months. I did put it off by three weeks, before I got backed into a corner. Anyway...I went into labour the night before, so ds2 was born when he was supposed to be! I'd never do it any other way again.

[Ben's Mommy]

Originally Posted by cdenuccio

Thank you to those who've given me their ideas so far for creating a birth in a c/s! This is so out of my experience that I don't even know what to want. Did anyone have a c/s birth plan? Did anyone who knew they'd have a c/s wait til they were in labor to go in for the surgery? I'm thinking of that, both for the baby's health (labor hormones and such) and just to let her/him pick her own bday.

thanks again for the input. I really appreciate it all and welcome more!

Cara

I do know there are women here who waited to go into labor first before their c-sec's. Hopefully they'll speak up about their experiences. As far as a birth plan goes, I do not have one yet, but got MANY good ideas from OnTheFence's birh plan. Here is the link...I hope (I'm not very computer savy!) http://www.mothering.com/discussions...ght=birth+plan Hope this helps in your research!

[SKK]

Hi,

I haven't posted here for awhile.

Last night I had a dream that I gave birth - vaginally and naturally and quickly - to baby number 3 (I haven't even yet fully decided whether there will be a baby number 3, although if I hadn't already had two c-sections, it would be a no-brainer). It was a wonderful dream. After the birth, I felt so good - like I was just ready to get up and go! I was so thrilled and proud, like this thing I thought was never going to happen finally did! The baby was another boy!

It made me so wistful and sad for the loss of my much hoped-for and tried-for natural births.

[OnTheFence]

Originally Posted by Ben's Mommy

Kim - It's great to hear from you. I just barely got to meet you before your hiatus. I've read some pp of yours including your birth plan and you have given me a LOT of good ideas for my birthing future. I look forward to getting to know you better and I'm glad your family is doing well post-hurricane! By the way, I LOVE your idea of a cesarean goddess web page! Look forward to browsing thru it when you are done.
(You are more than welcome to take over the thread at the beginning of each month - I took the liberty of doing it while you were away.) Welcome Back!

Thanks for the sweet words and I am so glad someone took up creating the support thread while I was gone. I think this thread is very important to the mothering community. Whether one agrees with me or anyone who has chosen a csection or ended up having one for a variety of reasons, this thread is needed to spread the word that there are choices available to every mother and every kind of birth.

[OnTheFence]

Originally Posted by cdenuccio

Thank you to those who've given me their ideas so far for creating a birth in a c/s! This is so out of my experience that I don't even know what to want. Did anyone have a c/s birth plan? Did anyone who knew they'd have a c/s wait til they were in labor to go in for the surgery? I'm thinking of that, both for the baby's health (labor hormones and such) and just to let her/him pick her own bday.

thanks again for the input. I really appreciate it all and welcome more!

Cara

On past threads there are Cesarean Birth Plans. Also, if you go to my blog and click on the Cesarean Goddess Section my Birthplan is located there.

I did not go into labor first, but actually scheduled my csection (and the one before it). I would defintiely plan, schedule another one if I find myself pregnant again. I personally feel its safer for mother and baby if you know your dates. There is research to support both sides, so its really a personal decision.

Kim

[chantald]

Morning
Kim, good to hear from you. for the 2ww. Strange that they contradict an emergency IUD :
When will you know?

Cara: I went into labor before my second section. My second c/s was not planned.. I ws hoping for a vbac. I am not sure if I would go into labor if I had another baby. I haven't talked about this with a Dr to know what they would "allow". I have read that it is better for baby to go into labor. But just like anything else, I think it depends on the individual, the reason for the c/s etc. I am sure that in some cases it would not be wise to go into labor..



Chantal

[J-Max]

Cara - I have had 3 c/s and have the birthplan from my last if you would like it. It is a word Doc. and I can email to you. I had a good doc and knew what I wanted. DD had trouble breathing, so I did not get to see or hold her for about 12 hours, howeverm the nurses and my fp doc brought me pictures and did not feed her anything.

Kim - thanks for checking in, I was wondering how you were

I am torn on what to do for the next baby, too. We want at least 1 more, and maybe more. My doc says he is fine with me having a few more (by c/s) I think I will really push for a vba3c. I have heard that there is a midwife about 2 hours south of me that has done some vba2cs, so I am thinking of contacting her. I want to wait about 3 years and lose at least 50 lbs before I get preg (I am down about 10 lbs!!!)

[eilonwy]

I'm planning to VBAC #3, but I'd like to have a c-section birth plan as a back up just in case. I'd much rather be prepared for any eventuality; I was so totally unprepared for my section! Like most women, I naively believed that I couldn't possibly become one of those statistics. At any rate: I guess it's time to start thinking about this stuff now, while I'm still early enough to make changes and while my doc has plenty of time to go over everything and get it all firmly embedded in his mind. :LOL

[PaytonsMom]

My co-workers wife just gave birth vaginally to a 9lb 6oz baby girl who was 23 inches long. I am now 13 months past my section, and still I found myself in the bathroom crying becasue of the wave of failure that flew over me. When will I be able to be HAPPY for those who can have a baby without medical intervention telling them that they are a failure?

[soccerchic21]

Originally Posted by PaytonsMom

My co-workers wife just gave birth vaginally to a 9lb 6oz baby girl who was 23 inches long. I am now 13 months past my section, and still I found myself in the bathroom crying becasue of the wave of failure that flew over me. When will I be able to be HAPPY for those who can have a baby without medical intervention telling them that they are a failure?

I always feel the same way! I am 3 months out and I was at my brother's house this weekend and he was talking about some interview he heard on the radio with a gal who's big baby broke a local hospital record. That baby was something like 13 pounds.

Anyway my childless brother commented about "when they are a certain size you have to have a c-section don't you"

arrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhggggggggg

Of course I am the expert with a 10lb 6 oz boy.

[chantald]

s for you mommas... many many s

Chantal

[Storm Bride]

After a few years, I found it didn't bother me quite as much. But, I still get upset when somebody who I don't think did anything "right" has a vaginal birth. It doesn't bother me so much when somebody looked after herself and educated herself, etc. But, I have to admit that I still get upset when one of the "gimme the epi" or "c-sections are cheating" crowd ends up with a vaginal birth. I'm not proud to admit to it...but it does upset me and make me mad.

[ChattyCat]

Originally Posted by Storm Bride

After a few years, I found it didn't bother me quite as much. But, I still get upset when somebody who I don't think did anything "right" has a vaginal birth. It doesn't bother me so much when somebody looked after herself and educated herself, etc. But, I have to admit that I still get upset when one of the "gimme the epi" or "c-sections are cheating" crowd ends up with a vaginal birth. I'm not proud to admit to it...but it does upset me and make me mad.

That upsets me too. And, I also feel the need to justify and defend my csec. I do believe that way to many csecs are done in this country. So, to crunchy friends I explain why going into the woods and birthing by myself wouldn't have helped in my situtation. And, to my mainstream friends, I explain why it really was necessary and why most aren't. AUGH!!!!!!! At some point in my life, I really hope I can move past csecs and vaginal births having such a central role in my life.

Also, I am petrified of having a csec in about 6.5 months. It really keeps me up at night sometimes, and I stress constantly. Does anyone else feel like this?

[PaytonsMom]

I too want more kids and look forward to being pg again, but am afraid of having to have another cection to have them.

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by momma2emerson

Also, I am petrified of having a csec in about 6.5 months. It really keeps me up at night sometimes, and I stress constantly. Does anyone else feel like this?

Yes. For the first three or four months of my pregnancy with ds2, I had constant nightmares and insomnia. (I'm prone to insomnia, but I never get nightmares!) My doctor had already told me I was going to have to have a third section, and I thought I could cope. But, when it came down to actually being pregnant...I couldn't. My OB agreed, reluctantly, that we could go for my VBA2C, and the nightmares and insomnia disappeared.

Of course, I did end up with a third section. Now, I'm trying to decide what to do about a fourth baby. I really, really, really want one more child. But, I don't want another section. And, I'm worried about the effect all of this has on me as a mother to my existing children. I know dd went through absolute hell this summer because I couldn't pick her up for weeks, and I'd scream when she threw herself at me and hit my incision. She just didn't get what was going on, and she's very, very spirited, anyway. She had a horrible time...