We have been talking with this (Montessori) preschool since ds was two, the admissions woman knew his food allergies, I met with her twice and we had several phone conversations discussing food allergies. She told me there were no eggs allowed for easter or any other time, (except in the elementary when they hatch chicks in a incubator in the spring) she said it was a peanut free school, and when I asked to meet with the teacher she said I had to wait until parent orientation night to set up an appointment. I waited. I purchased the FAAN preschoolder binder, I revised his allergy action plan from last year and got the allergist signature, I had the occupational therapist type a list of sensory activities ( carrying a stack of books, swinging from monkey bars, simple stuff) I typed a list of safe fruits and vegetables, and finally met with the teacher and head of school last week. They seemed intrested and like they cared, there is a boy with a milk allergy in the classroom ds was supposed to be in, I was impressed because they did not seem to see me as a pain and they seemed to genuinely care about ds (unlike the last preschool, where they fed him allergic foods 4 times in one year and seemed to think I was overprotective)They use soy milk instead of regular milk when making muffins in the classroon ect ect
I walk into the classroom for another tour before meeting with the school and the teacher shows me the egg-peeling activity,
MY JAW DROPS
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: 
Meal preperation is a typical montessori activity. The admissions person, who left in June, just after my last conversation with her, specificaly told me there were no eggs for easter or any other time (I know because I called to ask if they had real eggs during easter after ds had to miss the easter activities at his old preschool because of real eggs)
I then met with the teacher and the head of school, went over the allergy action plan. They asked specifically what foods may cause what reactions, I explained that peanut and egg may cause airborne reactions, (he got hives once at a baseball game...i made sure he did not touch a thing and he sat on my lap on a blanket)
They called they day before his phase-in and said they would need to take time to postpone his phase-in to work out taking the "egg-peeling activity ect)
They called today and said they wished thay had known in the spring, that they feel they could not make the changes necessary to keep ds safe, that maybe next year. (The admissions woman I talked with and met in the spring several times and twice over the summer said that there were no eggs, that the school was peanut-free and that the children did not share food as policy, ect ect) So she must not have told the director about the allergies.
ADA does cover allergies, but I don't know if I want to send him somewhere if the admin and teacher resent us for making them take egg out of the classroom, horror of horrors, no egg peeling.
I asked the school to 1. see his file, I want to know if they really didn't have any FA info in his file and if not, why, since I've been talking with admissions about it for over a year. ( they have a new admin person now, been there for only one month)
2. inform them about 504 and the ADA(again, I tried to pre-empt this with a FAAN preschool binder about allergies and specifically 504)
3. Get in writing what accomodations they feel they would not be able to make to "keep ds safe"
I've already looked at the other montessori schools within a 45 min drive this one was the best one for ds, I thought. I'll have to look again.
Ds is heartbroken, I wasnt' going to tell him but he kept asking why he wasn't meeting with his new teacher and new class... who he met in the spring, remembered and really liked.
I should have done what I wanted to two years ago and gotten my montessori certification and started my own school. But now it would take 2 years for the certification and starting a school takes money, I believe in the montessori method, especailly for a kid with SID it's really almost essential for my ds. There are montessori at home books and I set a home environment to my best ability and we do montessori types of activities sometimes because that is what he gravitates towards and what he likes to do, but he also needs the socalization and to be with other kids.
The things that gets me is that I talked with the admission person every time there was a bunch aof "new" allergies and let her know that he had an airborne reaction to peanuts... she said it woudl be fine because the school was peanut free. She kep saying that I had to wait to meet with the guide and the director untill parent orientation night... that at orientation I coudl set up a meeting... and aftet the meeting they said that they didnt' have enought time and we should have told them in the spring. I have actually been meeting with and talking with the admissions person for over a year. So she either was clueless or lied, said there were no eggs in the classroom and I find out there are eggs two days before he is supposed to start. I had a legnthy conversation with the head of school and mentioned 504 and ADA she said she had already talked to thier lawyer She intimated that our requests were doable: 1. no eggs in the classroom 2. children wash hands AFTER snack and ds wipes down the table before he eats 3. I provide rice flour/palm kernal shortening for baking activities. But said they would have stil declined if they had known earlier in the year.
Maybe it was the seizures and sensory integration and asthsma that really cincched it. For the first time I really felt like it was an "ability" I never felt that way before, not realy to this extent. I was hammered with... "these people look at him as a kid with "abilities"... he is missing out because they don't want to be responsible for taking care of him" I never really looked at it that way before. I was always just thankfull that he can run and play and is not in a wheelchair and he is talking ect ect. Then when I was explaining what happened my dad actually backed up the school, saying "well ds is a lot of work" !@#%&*!
(he's never watched him alone.. we don't trust them ect ect) I realized that people see us as this family who is always having a new allergy or new problem... not just for who we are.
:
The director said that when she observed two children,(who may have come directly from the snack table) helping a new child who was crying she was worried about cross contamination and about food getting ds. She did have a point there because I was a little worried about small exposures making him more reactive.
It probably is better for him, physically, to be at home where we don't often use foods that he is allergic to, and when DH eats wheat or milk ect we are very carefull to wipe everything down and sweep the floor ect, and dont' eat it with him at the same table ect ect. BUT it is sad that allergies is causing him to miss important educational and social opportunities though.
I walk into the classroom for another tour before meeting with the school and the teacher shows me the egg-peeling activity,
MY JAW DROPS
: : Meal preperation is a typical montessori activity. The admissions person, who left in June, just after my last conversation with her, specificaly told me there were no eggs for easter or any other time (I know because I called to ask if they had real eggs during easter after ds had to miss the easter activities at his old preschool because of real eggs)
I then met with the teacher and the head of school, went over the allergy action plan. They asked specifically what foods may cause what reactions, I explained that peanut and egg may cause airborne reactions, (he got hives once at a baseball game...i made sure he did not touch a thing and he sat on my lap on a blanket)
They called they day before his phase-in and said they would need to take time to postpone his phase-in to work out taking the "egg-peeling activity ect)
They called today and said they wished thay had known in the spring, that they feel they could not make the changes necessary to keep ds safe, that maybe next year. (The admissions woman I talked with and met in the spring several times and twice over the summer said that there were no eggs, that the school was peanut-free and that the children did not share food as policy, ect ect) So she must not have told the director about the allergies.
ADA does cover allergies, but I don't know if I want to send him somewhere if the admin and teacher resent us for making them take egg out of the classroom, horror of horrors, no egg peeling.
I asked the school to 1. see his file, I want to know if they really didn't have any FA info in his file and if not, why, since I've been talking with admissions about it for over a year. ( they have a new admin person now, been there for only one month)
2. inform them about 504 and the ADA(again, I tried to pre-empt this with a FAAN preschool binder about allergies and specifically 504)
3. Get in writing what accomodations they feel they would not be able to make to "keep ds safe"
I've already looked at the other montessori schools within a 45 min drive this one was the best one for ds, I thought. I'll have to look again.
Ds is heartbroken, I wasnt' going to tell him but he kept asking why he wasn't meeting with his new teacher and new class... who he met in the spring, remembered and really liked.
I should have done what I wanted to two years ago and gotten my montessori certification and started my own school. But now it would take 2 years for the certification and starting a school takes money, I believe in the montessori method, especailly for a kid with SID it's really almost essential for my ds. There are montessori at home books and I set a home environment to my best ability and we do montessori types of activities sometimes because that is what he gravitates towards and what he likes to do, but he also needs the socalization and to be with other kids.
The things that gets me is that I talked with the admission person every time there was a bunch aof "new" allergies and let her know that he had an airborne reaction to peanuts... she said it woudl be fine because the school was peanut free. She kep saying that I had to wait to meet with the guide and the director untill parent orientation night... that at orientation I coudl set up a meeting... and aftet the meeting they said that they didnt' have enought time and we should have told them in the spring. I have actually been meeting with and talking with the admissions person for over a year. So she either was clueless or lied, said there were no eggs in the classroom and I find out there are eggs two days before he is supposed to start. I had a legnthy conversation with the head of school and mentioned 504 and ADA she said she had already talked to thier lawyer She intimated that our requests were doable: 1. no eggs in the classroom 2. children wash hands AFTER snack and ds wipes down the table before he eats 3. I provide rice flour/palm kernal shortening for baking activities. But said they would have stil declined if they had known earlier in the year.
Maybe it was the seizures and sensory integration and asthsma that really cincched it. For the first time I really felt like it was an "ability" I never felt that way before, not realy to this extent. I was hammered with... "these people look at him as a kid with "abilities"... he is missing out because they don't want to be responsible for taking care of him" I never really looked at it that way before. I was always just thankfull that he can run and play and is not in a wheelchair and he is talking ect ect. Then when I was explaining what happened my dad actually backed up the school, saying "well ds is a lot of work" !@#%&*!
(he's never watched him alone.. we don't trust them ect ect) I realized that people see us as this family who is always having a new allergy or new problem... not just for who we are.
:The director said that when she observed two children,(who may have come directly from the snack table) helping a new child who was crying she was worried about cross contamination and about food getting ds. She did have a point there because I was a little worried about small exposures making him more reactive.
It probably is better for him, physically, to be at home where we don't often use foods that he is allergic to, and when DH eats wheat or milk ect we are very carefull to wipe everything down and sweep the floor ect, and dont' eat it with him at the same table ect ect. BUT it is sad that allergies is causing him to miss important educational and social opportunities though.
that sucks. hopefully some wise mamas will be along soon.
FWIW, my ds attended 2 Montessori school sand neither did activities involving eggs like you descibed. I think thats bizarre they think that activity is so important. I'm very lucky that my kids have outgrown their allergies, but like Chanley, severe food allergies are a major reason my sister has decided to homeschool hers.
