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What reaction/s did you get?

post #1 of 77
Thread Starter 
from your dr or nurses when you told them you weren't going to circ?

My dr is First Nations (Native American in US talk) and so her reaction was like 'of course you're not going to', because it just isn't done in First Nations culture.

And the nurse said "Oh Good." Rofl although my reaction to the question was "omg no way no how no no no." So that may have influenced her a bit.
post #2 of 77
The ped practically clicked his heels in glee. :LOL He's obviously bothered by it, but I hope someday he grows the intestinal fortitude to come out and BE anti-circ, not just that neutral "parent's choice" speech he gave beforehand.
post #3 of 77
Strange look, followed by asking 5 more times over the end of the appt and the next two. Followed by telling me "it's not like you can let HIM decide." OH...ISN'T IT?
post #4 of 77
puzzlement by the admissions chick (to my answer of, "good god, no" & looking at her like she was a crazy lady) & "thank god" from a postpartum nurse. susan
post #5 of 77
With my first guy, our family doc (I LOVE HER) didn't even offer it either at the hospital of afterward. At the first office visit she saw we left him intact and she informed us that the vast majority of her patients were leaving their sons intact.

The nurses in the hospital were a different story though. They offered up circumcision repetedly like they were offering up afternoon tea with each of my sons.

With Gavin(my second) the ped who offered it up at the hospital said "good". I felt like asking, if it was so good we said no why did you offer at all?

So mixed responses for us.....docs good, nurses not so much.

Take care,
post #6 of 77
When the nurse asked me and I said "No' She said, surprised, "Ever?" I said "That's right." She gave a little "Hmmm!"
Neer heard a word about it from any doctor.
post #7 of 77
Our ped was great, he actually discourage it Our midwife was amazing too, but of course she knew we were pretty crunchy.
post #8 of 77
I got two very different reactions from the hospital when I had my DD 7½ years ago and when I had DS's 3 & 3.

When I had DD I knew I was having a girl but they INSISTED that I had to sign the consent form or decline it. I was in LABOR and in pain but the nurse kept after me. I told her repeatedly I didn't need to sign it since we were having a girl, and she kept harping on me. Finally in anger and frustration (and pain!) I screamed at her that I wouldn't sign it and that they certainly wouldn't get consent from ME to cut my son. DH asked if he could sign it (mostly out of curiosity) and the nurse told him he couldn't because until we walked out of the hospital he had no rights to the baby. She THEN went on to lecture ME about how circumcision is the best thing and how I was doing an injustice to my child but NOT cutting him..... and then turned around and told my DH that as soon as we left the hospital he could drop me off at home and take the baby to a urologist and have him cut right then and there and he wouldn't "need HER permission to do it." OMG I cannot even tell you how angry I was. AFTER I had the baby and went home I wrote a letter of complaint to the hospital (naming the nurse) and to my insurance company. I got a letter of apology from the hospital... yeah, big whoop.

When I had DS2 DH and I agreed that we wouldn't circ. It wasn't even an issue. When I went in and they asked me about the consent form I told them that WE were not giving consent. DS2 was cared for by a neonatologist in the hospital as he was 4 weeks early (but was fine and roomed in with me the whole time). At one point she said something like "Well, after he's circ'd I'll..." and I stopped her dead in her tracks and said "He's NOT getting circ'd!!!!" I swear she got choked up and came over to the bed and HUGGED me and told me "You've made a wonderful decision!" That same time in the hospital when my OB came to visit she also made a comment about "when he's circ'd" and I told HER that he was not getting cut she also smiled at me and said happily "Oh that's so great!" MANY nurses asked us repeatedly "When he is getting circ'd again?" and I repeatedly told them "NEVER... and if he is you all will have a law suit on your hands the likes of which will pay for my GREAT-Grandchildren to attend college!" That shut people up pretty quick.

When I had DS3 he was in the NICU and I'd have to say that 99% of the nurses in there are adamently against circ. So when I told them that Ben wasn't going to be circ'd they were thrilled I actually talked the people with the baby next to Ben into NOT circ'ing their little boy!! I was so happy Unfortuantely I wasn't able to convince the people with the baby on the other side of Ben Oh well, can't win them all. However the nurses did tell me that since they often have parents in there for so long "with their ear" that many many more boys leave the NICU intact than that leave the regular nursery intact. I thought that was VERY interesting!!!

~ Patti
mom of 5
post #9 of 77
I got a lot of "good for you" and "a lot of people are choosing not to these days, there really isn't any reason to do anyway" not once did any healthcare worker ever say anythink (even 6 years ago) negative about my choice.
post #10 of 77
Nobody ever said anything about not circ'ing DS. I had it in my birth plan that we weren't circ'ing, and nobody (nurses, doctors) ever brought it up.
post #11 of 77
The ped at the hospital said there aren't many benifits anyway , so is the dad circed (I said yes), oh well you can always do it later.
The ped was not American, I believe he was from India, probably not circed himself but he did seem disappointed we weren't going to let him cut our baby. I don't see why he had to ask me at all it was already in my chart that I had declined the wonderful : offer of mutilating my newborn son.
post #12 of 77
Originally Posted by Mewsin
My dr is First Nations (Native American in US talk) and so her reaction was like 'of course you're not going to', because it just isn't done in First Nations culture.
I'm glad to hear that where you live, Native Americans do not circumcise. I live in upper Michigan near a Potawatomi reservation (with HUGE gaming casino complex, I might add) and most of them circumcise as far as I know.

Our local hospital where most people in our community go, including moms from the reservation, has around a 95% circumcision rate. I have cared for several native American babies in my employment and they were all circumcised, including a 4.5# preemie.
post #13 of 77
My midwife and doctor both know me enough to know that I wasn't going to let that happen to my DS. Both asked in a very neutral tone, just to be certain they weren't second guessing me I'm sure. No one has ever tried to convince me otherwise.
post #14 of 77
Originally Posted by Sheacoby
The ped was not American, I believe he was from India, probably not circed himself but he did seem disappointed we weren't going to let him cut our baby. I don't see why he had to ask me at all it was already in my chart that I had declined the wonderful : offer of mutilating my newborn son.
$300.00 maybe?

post #15 of 77
Before we knew that dd#2 was a girl, the nurse at our former ped's office brought it up. I told her that I would not be circing a boy and she freaked out. I got a long diatribe about how her dh had not been circed and it had scarred him for life b/c he was so humiliated when other boys saw him in the locker room that he "had to" have it done as an adult. That was not the only reason, but it was one of the reasons that we eventually changed peds (that nurse was always giving me grief about my parenting choices -- bf, cosleeping, diet...).
post #16 of 77
I played dumb when the question of circ came up just to see what they were telling parents who were "on the fence". The ped who was subbing for our fam doctor that day was recently voted by his peers as being the top ped in our area of the state. Anyway, when he asked if we were going to circ I said, "Well, I don't know. As far as I know there's no real benefit. Is that true?" He said he had four boys and two were circed and two weren't. Oddly to me, the younger two were circ'ed and the older two weren't. (They all have the same mother and father fwiw.) The docotr said there are studies on both sides that show an advantage, but that it's so negligible that it really should just be up to the parents' preference. Then he went on to say that one advantage of circ'ing was that the bathroom stays a lot cleaner when your child is learning to use the toilet. Not as much "dribbling".

How sad that that would be offered as a reason to do surgery
post #17 of 77
No reaction really. They acted like not circ was the norm.
post #18 of 77
my boys were born 9 weeks early. Circ was only mentioned once. I was told by one of the neonatologists that if we wanted it done it would be done shortly before discharge. We explained that we would not be having it done. He made a note on the chart and it was never mentioned again.

my ped has never really talked about it one way or the other, except for once a year or so ago when he asked what we were doing in the way of care. I told him that I had instructed the boys to retract themselves in the bath or shower as far as they were comfortable and let the water run on it for a moment or two. He smiled, said, "perfect" and that was the end of the discussion.
post #19 of 77
I had a hospital birth and when I was checking in the nurse saw the "no circ" on my admission forms and ripped up the consent sheet. She said she was glad that we weren't doing it and wished she had known more about it before her son was born.

The day I was checking out the midwife buzzed me on the intercom and asked if I wanted him circ'd, I shouted back "hell no!!!" loud enough for everybody at the nurses station to hear.
post #20 of 77
If doctors or nurses solicited you to have your son circed, you can speak up and hopefully change their behavior! They are soliciting for (cosmetic) surgery, which is unethical and is misconduct. You can send letters of complaint about this to

The CEO of the hospital (even if it didn't happen in the hospital, find out where the offending doctor has privileges and send it to those hospitals)

The hospital's risk manager

The head of the department (OB, peds, emergency, etc.)

The state medical board

The Joint Commission on Accreditation of Healthcare Organizations (link )

Complaint Form

Speak up!
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