Christian men should be washing their wives' feet and handfeeding them bread and wine at the end of the day...
Why is it all on the women? B/c it is the patriarchy coloring this whole thing. The dh can do whatever he wants, drink, carouse, have affairs or otherwise neglect his wife's sexual needs, make ridiculous business decisions plunging the family into bankruptcy, and wifey just has to suck it up?
Even my hyper fundie parents IL hold that if there is abuse (emotional as well as physical, or extreme irresponsibility of the dh), the wife is off the hook. And they support their dd, my SIL, in her move towards financial independence and divorce.
Here is a Christian woman's role according to the fathers of your church, and evangelical Christianity:http://atheism.about.com/b/a/152227.htm
"St" Clement of Alexandria (150?-215?): "Every woman should be filled with shame by the thought that she is a woman."
Tertullian (160?-220?): "Woman is a temple built over a sewer, the gateway to the devil. Woman, you are the devil's doorway. You led astray one whom the devil would not dare attack directly. It was your fault that the Son of God had to die; you should always go in mourning and rags."
"St" Ambrose (339-97): "Adam was deceived by Eve, not Eve by Adam... it is right that he whom that woman induced to sin should assume the role of guide lest he fall again through feminine instability."
"St" Augustine (354-430): "Woman was merely man's helpmate, a function which pertains to her alone. She is not the image of God but as far as man is concerned, he is by himself the image of God."
Pope Gregory I (540-604): "Woman is slow in understanding and her unstable and naive mind renders her by way of natural weakness to the necessity of a strong hand in her husband. Her 'use' is two fold; [carnal] sex and motherhood."
"St" Thomas Aquinas (1225-74): "[Woman] was made only to assist with procreation."
John Knox (1513-72): "Woman was made for only one reason, to serve and obey man."
John Wesley (1703-91): "Wife: Be content to be insignificant. What loss would it be to God or man had you never been born."
Southern Baptist Convention (2000): "A wife should submit herself to the leadership of her husband. Leadership in the church should always be male."
Local church in Holland (2004): "More and more we see women being placed in the position of Elder or Pastor in churches. Is this a good thing? Well, if your goal is to undermine the authority of the Word of God, it's a good thing."
The position of women in Christianity is much better today than it was even just a few decades ago, never mind a few centuries ago, but it's interesting to note the degree to which many traditionalists continue to fight against treating women as if they were fully equal. They insist that women have a "different" role in life than men, conveniently ignoring the fact that this "different" role inevitably becomes a "lesser" role as soon as the cameras leave the press conference.