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SAHMs: Is your house a disaster at the end of the day?!? - Page 2

post #21 of 65
Come on...I'm a stay at home MOM not a stay at home HOUSEKEEPER!!! :LOL My husband and I "let it go" until we've reached "explosion" stage ("honey, the kitchen exploded...we're out of dishes...I'm going to clean now...you have baby duty.")
post #22 of 65
OH YES! I start off the day by running the dishwasher and putting laundry in and folding the load that is sitting in the dryer. I get the baby down for a nap, get the kids up and brush teeth and get dressed. Then I make breakfast. I usually have time during the day to put the clean dishes away, keep the laundry going, do a craft or two with the kids and then I make a quick lunch like quesadillas or sandwiches and we high tail it out of the house.
So of course, we come back and dump everything on the floor by the door. The kids play and run hog wild while I cook dinner. I attempt to curtail their wildest mess efforts while I'm cooking and taking care of everyone but that also means I certainly can't clean as I go while I'm in the kitchen. So then the kitchen looks ilke it puked and we have a rowdy dinner with me hopping up and down dealing with this or that. We all pitch in to clear the table when we're done and I load a few dishes into the dishwasher before it starts to feel like chaos. So I take a break and load the kids into the tub to wash them and finish eating MY dinner while they're at it.
After flax oil massage, jammies, a quick toy pick up that they help me with, we all settle down. I usually try to get the baby to sleep but if the big kids aren't settled, they end up waking her up repeatedly.

Once the baby is asleep and the kids are mellow, I might have some energy to do about 20 minutes of toy pickup, laundry folding or kitchen tidying. I usually get around to sweeping the living room floor at some point and loading the dishwasher but not running it. If they are all asleep by 10 and the baby hasn't woken up to nurse yet, I can get the house looking pretty good with just an hour or wiping and sweeping and mopping. That only happens about once or twice a week.
post #23 of 65
Yes, my house is frequently a disaster. When my dd was younger and actually held still at times besides when she was sleeping ( :LOL ) my house looked really nice. Now, it is pretty bad but I've frankly just given up which was really hard for me to do. I'm a clean freak at heart, but spending time with my dd is much more important to me. I don't really entertain anyone besides close family so it really isn't that big of a deal right now.

Anna is like this most of the day: and I end up like this: if I try to clean while she is awake and playing. I do let her have about 20 min of Sesame Street, etc in the am so I can empty the dishwasher or start laundry, and then I try to do other cleaning stuff while she is napping or my DH is home. Since we are in the middle of a huge remodel (where currently nothing is getting done : ) it makes it much harder to get things organized, so I just focus on the main living areas and making sure things aren't NASTY. I try to keep meals simple and my DH helps out if I start going a little crazy trying to keep up. I can't imagine anyone else with a dc the same age as Anna get much done either.

P.S. Yes, she is asleep right now, otherwise she'd be helping me type or unplugging the computer
post #24 of 65
i can't even remember the last time my house was spotless. i hardly have a time to shower let alone clean! i trip over toys at least 5 times a day. it's really no use putting them all back in the toybox because 10 minutes later my toddler has them strung all over the floor again.
post #25 of 65
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alkenny
I have two older children, so our situation isn't the norm and shouldn't be "expected" of you.

My house is the CLEANEST in the evening. After dinner, we all pitch in as a family to get the house tip-top. It can be cleaned up in 15 minutes flat easily, and it's nice to wind down and cuddle in bed knowing everything is done.
I agree to that! After dinner my husband cleans the dinner dishes and I take the kids downstairs and we clean the playroom. We also clean it before eating lunch or leaving to go anywhere. I got rid of ALOT of toys and that really helped with the cleanup. We have a system I am very anal about! At night is also when I vacuum the playroom a couple times a week and once a week I drag it upstairs in the evening to vacuum.

I do the dishes after breakfast and after lunch and try to clean as I go along when making dinner. The kids help me unload the dishwasher sometimes or they load their dishes into it. I vacuum the carpet under the kitchen table after almost every meal because they make a mess!

My house isn't gorgeous- we still have hotspots on bookshelves that collect mail. Sometimes the upstairs bathroom trashcan overflows and the toilet needs cleaning badly. But the places that friends see looks fine! heehee.
post #26 of 65
I, too, love to go on cleaning rampages, but suck at regular maintenance.

I love the term "toddler carnage" from the earlier post!

:LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL
post #27 of 65
Oh, thank goddess I'm not the only SAHM with a wreck of a house... I have a much higher mess tolerance thresh-hold than DH, so when he complains about the toys/books/toddler contraband, etc, constantly being all over the place, I remind him that it'll get worse before it gets better...

We had the biggest fight in our entire relationship over the state of mess in the house-- he didn't understand why I couldn't keep the house clean while chasing an active almost 2yo and constantly nursing the newborn... I told him that if he wanted things as clean as he expected them to be, I could take the kids and find somewhere else to live and he could stay behind to live in his spotless house and play with his fish tanks... That was a mean thing to say, but he's been much less neat-freak about things lately...
post #28 of 65
Quote:
Originally Posted by beansmommy
We had the biggest fight in our entire relationship over the state of mess in the house-- he didn't understand why I couldn't keep the house clean while chasing an active almost 2yo and constantly nursing the newborn... I told him that if he wanted things as clean as he expected them to be, I could take the kids and find somewhere else to live and he could stay behind to live in his spotless house and play with his fish tanks... That was a mean thing to say, but he's been much less neat-freak about things lately...
: Wow, I could have wrote that post, down to the fish tanks even. In fact when I read it to dh he thought I wrote it! :LOL
post #29 of 65
I do quick maintenance during the day, an laundry in the mornign, try to do some dishes after/during preparing breakfast, luch, dinner. Either that or I will rinse and stack in sink until after dinner to load. I usually fold laundry at night or a small load during the day.It's easiest to fold diapers wwhen dh is playing with kids at night. I learned quickly with my two, that I only vacumm at night unless it is a quick vaccum or sweep after a meal. I have to vacum EVERY DAY. SO, after dinner, I clean some, do nbathrooms, floors once a week. only do major cleanign right before the kids go to bed. Because it will just be out again. So I don't bother til night. Except for occasiopnal 5 minute straightening of pillows, organizing, etc.
post #30 of 65
Our house has been a disaster. Partly because I was the only one cleaning but not the only one making messes.

It is better now that dd is getting older (5 years now) and has a play area in the basement and I instituted a rule that food stays in the kitchen. The kitchen is tiny and not for playing in anymore. Still an hour after I have cleaned the mess starts creeping back. I think I'm getting smarter about cleaning. I do it more often but for a shorter time each session.
I have my dd help sometimes. She can pick up toys and take them to her room.

There is nothing out of my dd's reach now. I put stuff on the top shelf of our very tallest cabinet. She moves a chair and climbs to reach it.
post #31 of 65
No matter how hard I seem to work at it...by days end the house is a mess!
It's just not my top priority...after dinner I'd rather go with the kids to play outside a few more minutes or play a game or read some stories. I always think, once their in bed I'll clean the kitchen up but I'm always too tired. So I start the day with a mess to clean. Oh well...

I'm a stay-at-home mom, not a housewife. To me, housewife is someone into cleaning, organizing, cooking fancy meals, etc. Nothing wrong with that just totally not me.
post #32 of 65
The worst time in our house is in the evening. For one thing, I have run out of steam by that time.

My dh dropped home unexpectedly for lunch today and he was shocked. Swept floors, clean kitchen counters, washer and dryer humming, my daughters and me folding and hanging clothes together in the picked up bedroom. The family bed was not "made" since it is on the floor, but the blankets were folded and pillows arranged.

I tried to explain that it almost always looks like that on weekdays at noon, but by the time five or six more hours (and two more meals and a snack and baths and an art project or a sand and water table event) have gone by, it gets harder and harder to keep up. It takes a lot of stamina to feed, clothe, bathe, (we do afternoon baths) and entertain a two year old and a three year old for ten or twelve hours, and by the last few hours I can barely keep up.

Why not weekends, he wanted to know. Dear readers, how can I explain the answer to that question tactfully, without pointing out that he is home on the weekends? So I just changed the subject.
post #33 of 65
Yes, my house is messier in the evening, because (1) DD has been at it all day and (2) I'm too tired to clean up AGAIN. However, I get up in the morning and do a lot of picking up. So I'd say that 10am is the cleanest time of day around here, and 10pm is the messiest!
post #34 of 65
Quote:
Originally Posted by happymomma
: Wow, I could have wrote that post, down to the fish tanks even. In fact when I read it to dh he thought I wrote it! :LOL
Same here.

Our house looks like a toybox & electronic store exploded.
post #35 of 65
Toddler carnage!!!! :LOL

My home is a disaster every darn night. I can do a load or two of laundry and keep up with the dishes during the day. I try to stay up after the littles are in bed but some nights I'm just drained. The house is yucky but I just don't feel like dealing with it tonight.
post #36 of 65

Welcome to my world!

Ooooh yes, I'm with you on this. And DD is only 4 months old. We just moved a month ago so my house is a continuous disaster. I'm lucky if I get regular stuff done (dishes, laundry) so unpacking is way low on my list of things to do. There are boxes and piles of stuff everywhere.

Pre-mommyhood I was a serious neat freak. Guess I'm learning to let that go.
post #37 of 65
It's a toddler thing. My older dd is actually becoming very helpful in cleaning up after herself-- because if she doesn't my toddler will ruin her stuff. :LOL

I keep all the toys with parts in locked cabinets and I pull them out one or two at a time. Basically I rotate toys. It keeps them new and exciting to the toddler and cuts down on the mess I have to clean up at the end of the day. The kids' room is a disaster but that's okay because it's not spread all over the house.

The kids are discouraged from entering the master bedroom. One less room to clean up. The schoolroom/office has a baby gate on it, and that's where I keep the art supplies for dd1 to use as she wishes. Dd2 is not allowed in there at all. I bring stuff out to her if she wants it.

Here's some funny pics I dug up from last summer. Thought you could probably relate! BTW all but the vaseline one happened on the same day!

Toddler gets into the vaseline

Toddler gets into the diaper cabinet (I normally have it locked but I forgot that one time)

Toddler gets into the kitchen towel drawer and the ziplock bag drawer underneath it (this happens a few times a day since that's not locked)

Thie girls' room

Toddler gets into the sock drawer
post #38 of 65
I always joke that you can tell how much time we spent at home by the way the house looks at the end of the day. A nice day-the house looks OK but a rainy day can be bad. Paint on the floor, crumbs everywhere, dishes stacked up, toys everywhere. My 4 year old dd is pretty good about cleaning up-she is super neat like her daddy. My two year old is a tornado. The kitchen is usually the worst because we do a lot of art projects. I try not to let it bother me too much. I'll attempt to pick up a bit and load the dishwasher throughout the day when the kids are playing independently which is rare. I do it because too much clutter make my dd and I a bit crazy. I don't see it as my job. Heck if the house always looked spotless, what would it say about what I did with my kids all day. The best is when I have a play group over on rainy days-so much fun but WOW-what a mess.

I know what you mean about the pile of stuff to keep away from your toddler. Our pile seems to end up on top of the refrigerator. It is amazing what he can get into. Anyone else's toddler a fan of toilet paper? Or the plethora of things that have ended up in the toilet!?

Luckily my dh is great about helping with the clean up after bedtime. I cook and do the dishes but that is because I want to while he takes over kid duty. Then we both pick up a bit after bedtime. I highly reccommend getting a dog if you don't have one-instant food clean up.

My MIL was the type whose house was always spotless, her lipstick perfect, dress ironed, and hot dinner on the table. Typical 50s housewife. I can't imagine how she did it.
post #39 of 65
Quote:
Originally Posted by beansmommy
he didn't understand why I couldn't keep the house clean while chasing an active almost 2yo and constantly nursing the newborn... I told him that if he wanted things as clean as he expected them to be, I could take the kids and find somewhere else to live and he could stay behind to live in his spotless house and play with his fish tanks...


Good for you .. geez, what's up with that?
post #40 of 65
Oh, BREATHE! It's not just you. My house is a semi-mess at the end of the day, too. I can usually manage to keep the kitchen okay, but the toys are usally strewn about in such a way that I frequently step on them. We also have a lot of shoes in this house and we tuck them under this bench in our entryway. Well, yesterday, both kids had a ball trying on daddy's and mommy's shoes and they were everywhere by the time daddy got home.

I often feel like a failure with the household management end of things. But my issue is laundry. I can't seem to manage laundry no matter what I do.
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