Me and my shadow....

[hipumpkins]

My DD who is 3 (well just about ) follows me everywhere. We live in an apartment which is one floor and not especially large. If we are in her room and I am folding laundry and bring somehitng to my room she says, "I'm coming" She is under my feet constantly.
At the end of the day, I am sick of it but I handle it fine. I don't shoo her away or anything. I am just wondering if this is a typical behavior for her age or if I should try to find out why she seems so fearful of me leaving?

I amnot working right now and she really is with me a lot. She is never sent away from me and I don't leave her at a babysitters or anything like that. Anytime she isn't with me it is her choice...like when she is with DH whom she adores.

[4evermom]

My ds, now 4, was always the same way. It is really just in the past year that he will be in a room alone, but he needs either the radio or TV on because he doesn't want to be surprised by a sudden noise (he always had a strong startle reflex). I thought that if I lived in smaller quarters with an open floor plan, that it would be helpful. It is like being tripped up by a cat some days. I can't believe that I don't step on his fingers constantly. I'm glad he is better about not wanting to be carried everywhere. That was aggravating when trying to do laundry!

The question with your dd is whether it is new behavior. Children seem to go through a fearful or anxious stage around age 3. I guess it is just becoming aware of how large the world is and that parents can't control everything.

[G&B'sMama]

My DD started being my and DH’s shadow around the same age too. She will go off and play by herself now, but she still tends to stand too close to people and for me- right in my blind spot. It’s especially hard to see her when I am carrying the babe because she stands behind my left side and I am holding a squirming toddler there- who is dominating my proreferal vision. Plus she can be so quiet you don’t know she is there until you step on her. Once when she was spending the night at my parents house my dad was up early. She likes to wake up early and spend time with him, so she got out of bed and walked right into the kitchen where he was getting coffee. When she said hello to him it surprised him so much he dropped his coffee cup :LOL: Now that she is older I am trying to help her understand people’s personal space and to announce herself before she scares the coffee out of anyone else.

[hipumpkins]

It is like being tripped up by a cat some days

That is exactly how I feel.

before she scares the coffee out of someone

:LOL

AS for it being new...it sort of gradually turned into this shadow thing. She used to play in her for a bit by herself but now if she is playing in the lving room she constantly checks to see where I am.

[Dandelion Grrl]

I have a little three year old shadow too

[mamabohl]

Hey! I've got one of those.... :LOL kinda makes me sometimes, but I know I'll remember it fondly when he's a teenager and keeps shut up in his room all day.

[Mere]

Yep, I've got a 3 year old shadow too. It seems to have gotten better lately, but she has been stepped on and tripped over many, many times.

[mamalita]

Just wanted to chime in that the situation is the same with us. DS (3.3yrs) barely lets me out of his sight even when I'm going to get food for him or uh, use the facilities . He's always been this way. Occasionally, I'll get worried that somehow - despite all my attempts at helping him feel secure - I created a very insecure child. He also likes for me to carry him when we're out and about (and he's over 35 lbs!) But then, like the previous poster, I remember that one day I'll get "kicked to the curb" and mom will be so uncool he'll run from my smooches and hugs.

Glad to know it isn't uncommon . . .

[Vito's Mommy]

Ds has an art table that he loves to play at and we made his playroom bright and inviting. He plays well on his own (most of the time) when we "have at home time." Do you belong to any playgroups or Kindermusic, etc..? This really helped ds become independent while I am running my WAHM Biz or getting my laundry done and all. HTH

[hipumpkins]

Do you belong to any playgroups or Kindermusic, etc..?

It was hard to find a program for her age that wasn't mommy and me and with a baby it would be too difficult to play. However we recently joined the Y and she is in a dance class that she LOVES!!! Doesn't pay a lick of attention to me when the teacher is dancing with the class.