i am so sad

[bcky2]

we just moved into our new house and my dh wants my 3 year old ds to start sleeping in his own room. we have co-slept for about 2 years now and it is killing me he has slept in his own bed for 2 nights now and comming into ours around 4:30ish in the morning. the first night i didnt sleep untill he came into our bed at 4:30 and the 2nd night i slept a little but woke up to find myself standing at our bedroom door calling down the hallway to my ds that mommy is here, come down to mommys room, i am right here. after that i couldnt go back to sleep untill he came into our room around 4:30. so i am now getting no sleep at all and feel terrible that he is in his room alone. nobody that i know irl supports the fact that we co-sleep so there is no help there is it normal to feel so sad and alone at night now that he is in his own room? i would love to hear from others that have made the transition and how they felt and dealt with it. thanks

[Minky]

I know that I have posted this before but I have made this work by snuggling and nursing DD to sleep in her own room and then later going to bed with DH. DD goes to bed 2 hours before we do now, so it hsa worked pretty well and kept DH happy, too.

[aidansmom05]

Hi Becky,

I feel for you, I don't have any experience b/c I only have 1 ds 5 months, but My DH wants Aidan to start sleeping in his room already, I am firmly against this, especially since I found out (which I thought was the case) that ds has enlarged adenoids, We go to a specialist on Nov 11. I think he has kind of realized that I have won this battle for now. I do not think that he will let us get to age three. How far is DS's room from yours? Maybe you could start out in his room with him, cuddle him. Do you have a baby monitor on in your room? Maybe that will help assure you that he is okay? Let us know please how everything is going!

[bcky2]

well last night dh fell asleep on the couch so i put ds in bed with me and slept like a rock all night im sure that tonight he will have to be back in his room. his room is actually right across the hall from ours. when he does sleep in his room i do lay with him untill he goes to sleep. he is just a very emotional boy and i guess i just hate the thought of him waking up at night and being scared that i am not there as we have slept together for so long, im sure that i will get over it at some point

[swissmiss]

Becky, (that's my name too!) I can relate on several levels. After 3 years of co-sleeping, I wake up even before my ds stirs, as I'm so programmed to night-waking/nursing. Sometimes I fear that I wake him by even twitching, but somehow we have managed to get through these years. Dh sleeps in the guest room for many reasons, but he and the rest of the world would like DS to have his own room/bed and when we've asked him, he has no interest. But the other night, after 2 nights of too many nursing sessions, I was tired and DH took DS to sleep in his bed. I was sure I'd be unable to fall asleep w/out ds, but after a while, I dozed off...Only to hear the little feet come padding down the hall to my bed. So that was our attempt at having ds fall asleep somewhere else. I've shown him the fun sheet-sets at the store with cartoon characters and he just says no! sleep with mommy!
The other thing it reminded me of was when a (non-mommy) friend said on the phone "Nursing a kid for this long is more for the mother than the kid." It made me think for a minute, but I decided that what we are doing clearly benefits both of us, even if others are too far removed to see it.
BUT, if your ds is NOT waking up screaming (which is what I came here to post about--stay tuned) in the night, then the time is right and he will be fine. Although just between you, me, and everyone reading this, I think it's weird that we emphasize how kids should learn to sleep alone, then when people get married, they suddenly have to share a bed--until death do us part?--and like it!! Sheesh.