Four year old won't eat..ideas??

[Caroline248]

My four year old refuses to eat any reasonable amounts of decent food. I usually wouldn't care, but she is falling off the charts (I know, not that big of a deal) and hasn't grown in over a year. Her hair won't grow, her nails hardly grow...obviously there is a problem. Our family dr is saying now maybe we should try some pediasure or nutritional drink. I just want her to eat.

We have tried just about everything. We let her pick our meals, let her shop for the food, take her to a farm where she can help pick veggies and fruit. She has helped cook the food. We let her decide when she is done and leave the table. NOthing works. We started forcing her to have at least a couple of bites becasue she has been waking up at night with hunger pains. We explained the pains were from not eating, but that doesn't seem to make a difference. We allow her to snack on healthy food, but she has maybe one yogurt a day.

I know it is normal to go through a phase like this, but this has been going on for over a year. That is not healthy. She has health issues (not related to eating or stomache etc).

Any ideas??

~C~

[hipumpkins]

I don't have any answers but didn't want to read and leave your post, "viewed " but no reply.
This sounds like a tough situation. I can't imagine how they will get her to drink pedia sure when she wont eat anyway. Will she drink? CAn you make a helathy shake for her?
Good luck to you and her!!

[Caroline248]

Thanks for your reply...

I don't know if she will drink the pediasure or any of the shakes I have recipes for. If they smell "funny" she won't touch them. I am going to try maybe a frozen yogurt shake?? That may be a good idea..

~C~

[meco]

we started giving my son Children's DHA by Nordic Naturals, and his appetite has increased remarkably. I was going through the same thing w/my 2.5 year old. Have you tried anything like that?

Fruit smoothies are also a big hit.

Have you let her go shopping to pick things out?

I wish I had more advice. :

[Vermillion]

I also agree with the smoothie/shake recommendation. There are endless possibilities to those! Here is one that my DS loves-

Milk (whatever kind you drink. Dairy, soy, etc.)
Nut butter (Almond, peanut, cashew, etc)
Banana
A little Ovaltine for chocolate flavor and extra vitamins, or you could use cocoa.
Blend to whatever consistency you like.

This is very tasty and has plenty of calories. Good calories and fat from the nut butter especially…

Also, if your DD ends up liking the fruit smoothies, avocados mix in very nicely with no taste. You can disguise the green color with berries. They will add some extra calories and healthy fats.

Good luck! HTH!

[oliversmum2000]

Do you know if she may have ever have had a negative experience with food that you havnt known about with a relative or somebody who has looked after her?

Could someone have said something ridiculous about weight or gaining weight to her or in her presence?

Maybe you could try to find out if there is an underlying issue which is getting in the way of her eating.

I have heard of child play therapists i have no idea if they are any good or not but maybe you could try to find out if there is an underlying reason.

Good luck

[quakerlady]

pediasure

Okay, my oldest daughter had similar issues but at a much younger age (BTW, have you eliminated a urinary tract infection?)
and we did pediasure for about 2 years. The first several months she didn't want it- but I gave it to her in the car when she was bored and she drank a little. Over time she eventually started to like it (some flavors, anyhow) and eventually built up to three cans a day. It was really good for us for about a year- we were still getting her over her eating issues and there were frequently weeks where I knew she wasn't eating really anything at all, but at least she was doing the pediasure and so I could relax. For us, that was the key to getting her to eat b/c it was basically an autonomy issue- she wouldn't eat so she didn't gain, so her (ex) pediatrician pressured me to "get that child to eat", soI chased her around with food and kept a food journal and other absurdities, all which taught her that it was a really good way to push my buttons. To get her to eat i had to STOP "getting" her to eat.
(But first she had a complete workup at the local children's hospital gastroenterology/nutrition clinic to make sure there was no underlying physical reason- food allergies, food absorption issues, infections, etc.)
You might also want to make sure there is zinc in her multivitamin, and consider food sensitivities like dairy...
After she was back on the charts it was hard for me to let go of the security of the pediasure and she really still wanted it, too, but we weaned her off it gradually over the course of a year.

[teachma]

My ds, now 5 years old, has gone through lengthy stretches of time without eating significant amounts of food. While he does not have an problem with his physical heath, he does suffer from anxiety which, when it flares, is essentially disabling, and I have linked that to the periods of no eating. Strangely, what has helped us the most is having him eat in different locations, like in the car in his carseat when we're going somewhere, or in the backyard on top of the playset. He also loves to eat food my mom has at her house, and grandma's special attention can go a long way toward geting him to eat. Luckily, she lives very nearby, so we can "use" her this way if need be. I will drop him off for a few hours, she'll sit at the table and play a board game with him or read some books, and put out a variety of foods (nuts, veggies, cheese, etc.) in small dishes. While they play or read, she will munch, and then he starts eating. Of course, if I try her approach, it doesn't work. It has to be Gram!

Like anything, having an empty tummy develops into a habit...the child just gets used to the way it feels and, after a while, doesn't really notice hunger cues at all. I have found that once we "break the cycle" by getting a few good meals in a row into ds, he begins to eat more normally again. Lots of luck; I know how frustrating this can be!

[Caroline248]

Thank you all so much..there are some great ideas! I do try to get her to eat while she does something else, and that seems to help. She will eat while she watches TV, so when Dora and Diego come on, I load her up! My husband tried a smoothie today, and she hated the fruit one. Then he made her more of a chocolatey one and she loved it. I will try to slip some fruit into a chocolate smoothie tomorrow, maybe that will go over!

There is nothing physically wrong with her, she is under pretty good dr care for epilepsy. Noone has watched her really except people that I trust 100%, so I doubt there was a trigger episode...she has never LIKED to eat. She did spend her first few months in the NICU and was fed through tubes etc...maybe that started it?? Who knows..

Thanks again, I will definatly use your advice!

~C~

[teachma]

Originally Posted by Caroline248

...she has never LIKED to eat.

~C~

This is my ds, too, actually. When he was three, he cried, "Mom, I just hate to eat. It takes too long!"