Having a hard time with weaning young toddler threads - Page 5

[Girl Named Sandoz]

Originally Posted by HappyHSer

This is true for many kids.

But not all, and that's why I no longer embrace CLW as an ideal. I've come to believe it's an artificial construct that emerged in response to a separation minded, accelerated independence loving, bottle feeding culture.

I understand your perspective. IMO it depends on your viewpoint and your expectations. Weaning is a natural process. Some children will engage in it earlier than others. All children however will at some point wean on their own accord (this may be 3 or 4 or it may be age 7 or 8 -- and not every parent is comfortable with this la(t)ter end of the range).

[HappyHSer]

I understand your perspective. IMO it depends on your viewpoint and your expectations. Weaning is a natural process. Some children will engage in it earlier than others. All children however will at some point wean on their own accord (this may be 3 or 4 or it may be age 7 or 8 -- and not every parent is comfortable with this la(t)ter end of the range).

No, my perspective is based on my experience. I don't embrace CLW as an ideal or natural process - *and* each of my kids weaned later than 5.

It wasn't their age that made me change my mind about CLW as a concept. It was the actual breastfeeding relationship with one of my kids. He challenged several of the ideas embraced by CLW.

That said, it's CLW as a concept that I disagree with. I do honor and embrace what I believe to be a natural and organic nursing relationship. If I were to have another child, I'd expect to be happily nursing another 5-6 years.

[Subhuti]

breastfeeding forum is a little confusing

Just a reflection on what some have said from a newbie to the breastfeeding forum.

I understand CLW'ers wanting to keep out people who cannot / choose not to CLW. But it is confusing for those that need to get support for "Gentle Early Weaning." It is not clear where we can post if we don't know the culture of the boards.

Many of us are indeed proponents of CLW and would assume it is OK to post here when we are forced/chose to wean early.

I have to wean, against my wishes, for medical reasons. It is going to be easily the hardest thing I have done as a parent. I dread it. I need practical advice, and more than that, emotional support. Where do we go with this? Perhaps we can have a subforum? It is not advocating "early weaning" just acknowledging it happens and people need to discuss it. If we had a subforum, you all wouldn't be getting people like me posting in CLW on early weaning, I think.

Anyway, looking forward to any suggestions for good threads or places for help on MDC for help with Gentle early weaning.

Liz

[Annikate]

Originally Posted by CatskillMtnMama
Just a reflection on what some have said from a newbie to the breastfeeding forum. I understand CLW'ers wanting to keep out people who cannot / choose not to CLW. But it is confusing for those that need to get support for "Gentle Early Weaning." It is not clear where we can post if we don't know the culture of the boards.

Many of us are indeed proponents of CLW and would assume it is OK to post here when we are forced/chose to wean early.

I have to wean, against my wishes, for medical reasons. It is going to be easily the hardest thing I have done as a parent. I dread it. I need practical advice, and more than that, emotional support. Where do we go with this? Perhaps we can have a subforum? It is not advocating "early weaning" just acknowledging it happens and people need to discuss it. If we had a subforum, you all wouldn't be getting people like me posting in CLW on early weaning, I think.

Anyway, looking forward to any suggestions for good threads or places for help on MDC for help with Gentle early weaning.

Liz

Totally agree! I am going through this right now w/ my 25 mo. old. I would love to have a subforum. Why don't you post this under Questions & Suggestions & I'll chime in too?

[mom2threenurslings]

Originally Posted by CatskillMtnMama

Just a reflection on what some have said from a newbie to the breastfeeding forum.

I understand CLW'ers wanting to keep out people who cannot / choose not to CLW. But it is confusing for those that need to get support for "Gentle Early Weaning." It is not clear where we can post if we don't know the culture of the boards.

Many of us are indeed proponents of CLW and would assume it is OK to post here when we are forced/chose to wean early.

I have to wean, against my wishes, for medical reasons. It is going to be easily the hardest thing I have done as a parent. I dread it. I need practical advice, and more than that, emotional support. Where do we go with this? Perhaps we can have a subforum? It is not advocating "early weaning" just acknowledging it happens and people need to discuss it. If we had a subforum, you all wouldn't be getting people like me posting in CLW on early weaning, I think.

Anyway, looking forward to any suggestions for good threads or places for help on MDC for help with Gentle early weaning.

Liz

I'd say Breastfeeding or Breastfeeding Beyond Infancy would be an appropriate place to post about gentle early weaning.

You mention that you need to wean due to medical reasons - and I notice you're pregnant and due in August 2006 and was wondering if pregnancy is the medical reason. The reason I'm curious is that many mamas don't know that it's safe (in most cases) to nurse through pregnancy and are told by unknowledgeable doctors that they need to wean. Congrats on your pregnancy!!!

[SereneBabe]

Originally Posted by HappyHSer

That said, it's CLW as a concept that I disagree with. I do honor and embrace what I believe to be a natural and organic nursing relationship. If I were to have another child, I'd expect to be happily nursing another 5-6 years.

What do you understand "CLW as a concept" to mean?

Thanks!

--Heather

[HappyHSer]

What do you understand "CLW as a concept" to mean?

Thanks!

I believe that the idea and concept of CLW arose out of the need in the alternative community to mother intuitively in a separation minded culture. We/they needed a vocabulary and vernacular to help us process ideas that are counter to the way most people here look at breastfeeding. I think the concept of CLW is one that believes all children will ask to nurse when they need it and end breastfeeding at the precisely right time for that child.

[Girl Named Sandoz]

Originally Posted by HappyHSer

I believe that the idea and concept of CLW arose out of the need in the alternative community to mother intuitively in a separation minded culture. We/they needed a vocabulary and vernacular to help us process ideas that are counter to the way most people here look at breastfeeding. I think the concept of CLW is one that believes all children will ask to nurse when they need it and end breastfeeding at the precisely right time for that child.

Can you expand on the reasons why you do not agree with the concept of CLW as you described it?

[loveingmom22]

i think children get vibes from mom that tell them she has had enough. My children went on nursing strikes at different times. But as they got older 2-3-4 I found myself offering to nurse more. I think they would get busy and forget to ask.Mine always had places and times that were special for them to nurse. All children are different. Also, as they get older they get distracted so easy. Popping on and off..drove me nuts. I thought once I stop offering they will stop...DAH!! nope. I think after 4 it becomes a routine for them.

[HappyHSer]

Can you expand on the reasons why you do not agree with the concept of CLW as you described it?

Yes, but since this is the CLW forum and not a debate forum, would it be more appropriate for me to share that in private or another forum?

I'm not trying to be evasive, but to resepct the board.

[Subhuti]

Hi All-
as to your question
Yes, I am pregnant, and I have a history of prelabor contractions starting in the 20th week. I would have definately breastfed through pregnancy, but it is too risky. As it was, I had to spend nearly 3 months in bed because of cervical issues. So, it's Mama-led weaning for us. Boo-hoo.
But we're doing it gradually and with the help of my DH.
Liz

[Girl Named Sandoz]

Originally Posted by HappyHSer

Yes, but since this is the CLW forum and not a debate forum, would it be more appropriate for me to share that in private or another forum?

I'm not trying to be evasive, but to resepct the board.

Sure, you can PM me if you wish. Thanks!

[mom2threenurslings]

Originally Posted by CatskillMtnMama

Hi All-
as to your question
Yes, I am pregnant, and I have a history of prelabor contractions starting in the 20th week. I would have definately breastfed through pregnancy, but it is too risky. As it was, I had to spend nearly 3 months in bed because of cervical issues. So, it's Mama-led weaning for us. Boo-hoo.
But we're doing it gradually and with the help of my DH.
Liz

to you! Wishing you and your baby a gentle weaning and wishing you a healthy, happy pregnancy! It sounds like you're doing what needs to be done in a very gentle way.

[Subhuti]

Thank you Amanda! You and your children are very lucky you've gotten so far in nursing!! Every nurse now is so nostalgic for me. I know Lulu doesn't know that this is her last season of nursing. My dh keeps telling me to concentrate on what we have been able to have (15 months of nursing) and do continue to have ( a wonderful close attached relationship ).

Liz

[mom2threenurslings]

Liz - You have such a wise and wonderful dh! You dd has gotten so much out of your nursing relationship and it has set a wonderful foundation for her physical and emotional health and your beautiful attached relationship with her.

[SereneBabe]

Originally Posted by HappyHSer

Yes, but since this is the CLW forum and not a debate forum, would it be more appropriate for me to share that in private or another forum?

I'm not trying to be evasive, but to resepct the board.

Ah ha! I see... I've been trying to get the very same answer to the very same question and haven't been getting it. I guess it didn't occur to me that it might be inappropriate for the forum?

HappyHSer wrote: "I think the concept of CLW is one that believes all children will ask to nurse when they need it and end breastfeeding at the precisely right time for that child." And that resonates with me, so I guess, using that definition of it, I'm definitely a CLW person. BUT, isn't it a useful and interesting discussion for many people to talk about the meanings of it and why or why not we find certain definitions valid in our own lives? Or, should I go to another forum to have that discussion?

I guess what I'm saying is I hope this discussion doesn't have to take place only in private? It's *exactly* what I've been struggling with in this forum, trying to figure out just what makes CLW different than other breastfeeding styles.

Here's to hoping you'll respond in public. ;-)

--Heather