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Later Starters Support thread - Page 9

post #161 of 281
Wallacesmum, applesauce still has the fibre in the apple in it, so it actually stops them up even more (BRAT - banana, rice, apple, toast). Apple juice loosens them up. Are you able to get some flax into his diet? That did wonders for our daughter. If he's fond of bread, flax bread might be good. Hope he's doing better now!
post #162 of 281
Oh, I meant to also thank you folks for this thread. I've only posted a couple of times, but I read often. Erin is now 18 months old and is just starting to finally get over a negative potty experience (daddy was offering too often and for too long while I was away one evening instead of going with the flow, pardon the pun). She peed on the toilet last week and again first thing this morning. She's been happily sitting on the toilet again for the past few months (yay for no more tears), but was still holding everything and going right after a potty sit.

I can't emphasize enough how utterly important it is for them to have only positive associations with the potty. Just a couple sessions of making them sit until they're frustrated does NOT work (thanks daddy, grrrrr) and in our case caused MONTHS of unwillingness to even consider the potty again.

We praised her loads when she peed last week and this morning. She got to have a piece of toilet paper (omg, soooo exciting for her) AND flush the toilet. I'm hoping she's starting to turn the corner now. Cross your fingers for us please!
post #163 of 281

Almost 19 months

Okay this is the first I heard of this --- where would I start??? We have apotty and DD we are just stating a potty "routine" (if there is such a thing) I am home with her most of the time but will start sub teaching soon now that school is back in session. I usually let DD go bottomless for an hour or so each morning then into undies and a plastic cover - so now she fights getting dressed.
post #164 of 281

We're new!!!

DS is 14 mos and we started going diaper free yesterday. Until about 2hours ago, I wasn't able to catch anything but ds went potty in the toilet after his nap and we caught a poo after lunch. Tomorrow, we are getting a BBLP and I plan on having that near us most, if not all, of the time. I was starting to think that I was not going to hang of this but the 2 catches were encouraging.

How often should I put him on the potty in the beginning? I don't want to overwhelm him. He's a sensitive guy.
post #165 of 281
My guy is 6 months old and we started ECing this past week. For the first three days - no catches. I tried putting him on the potty after naps and after nursing.. but nothin. On day three I realized he was going before I put him on the potty, but had to check the insert in the pocket diaper to realize that. Day four - caught a poopie! First catch. So proud of him!!! Day five- missed poopie, as he was playing and I was in the other room.. but, caught it later. He started grunting right in the middle of feeding (solids) and had to unbuckle him from the high chair and strip him down fast.. But we got there on time and he did another poop in the potty. Yay!! Yesterday was day 6 and we caught two pee-pees! The first was timing - right after a nap, and the next was timing plus cueing. He looked up at me just as he started as if to ask, "Is this ok, mom?" and I told him he was a good boy and I praised him up and down. Daddy came out from the other room to praise him, too. Hopefully this helped make the connection and it will continue tomorrow. He didn't do a poopie today at all.

I have a potty chair you put on top of the toilet and it clicks on. I bought a potty like the BBlp, but it's clear.. BUT.. it does not fit him. It is too small from back to front and it squashes his parts too much. So I am hoping they (ECstore.com) will accept a return on it as it is unused totally.

Here is a set of links about ECing if anyone would like them. I just posted them to another buddy group I'm in.


And there is a yahoogroup for this - http://groups.yahoo.com/group/eliminationcommunication/

Someone wanted to know how much to do it.. Well, I am trying for one catch a day.. the big poopie especially.. but I'd like to catch more. I am not trying for every time. I don't want to get too stressed about it.. Trust me, three days of no catches with 9 tries a day was getting stressful. Now that there have been some catches it is better, but still I don't want to do it every time. It means having to be super diligent about when he's getting up from naps. And usually in the morning he wakes up before I do, so that chance is typically gone. Anyhow, I am happy with the progress.
post #166 of 281

New to EC

My 11-month old son and I have just started the EC journey this past weekend. He seems to be taking to it pretty well. I've caught two poops and a few pees. I missed one poop lastnight but I think he went while eating in his high chair. It would have been difficult and messy to whisk him on to his potty at that time! We're still using regular disposables but mostly because I haven't had a chance to run out and get some pull-ups. He's not walking yet and I had planned to start potty training him as soon as he was but he had a solid poop last week and I felt like it was time for him to learn to use the potty. I lucked upon some websites discussing EC and now here we are, two poops later!

So far my method has been putting him on the potty as soon as we wake up in the morning and then right after nursing and nap times. Putting him on the potty after nap time is hard though because sometimes he's still kind of groggy and needs time to wake up but if I wait too long he pees in his diaper. I think he'll get used to the idea of the potty however.

I'm so glad to have found this board and be able to read about other mom's journeys. Wish us luck!
post #167 of 281

Some ideas

I've been lurking and trying this for a while. My boy at 13 months definitely decided he didn't want to go in his diaper anymore at night. He'd wake up dry and cry because he didn't want to pee. Took me a while to figure this one out, I'll tell you, because he would nurse right back to sleep -- and pee.

Anyway we've had great success and I used a technique I haven't heard mentioned, which is the first few times I tried putting him on the potty, I took all his clothes off and set it in the bathtub and turned the (cold) water on. He loved playing in the water with some of his bath toys so he was happy and didn't get bored, and I think the noise and the water on his hands and feet helped him go. He went right away and when he is "stuck" I still do this and it almost always seems to work. So maybe it will work for others too. I have a waterbug so maybe if your kid is the same it will be a good thing for you. Good luck everybody!
post #168 of 281
beansmama, you would probably want to start pottying at waking up times, in the morning and after naps. Then again 15 minutes after waking up in the morning. They pee a lot more in the morning than the afternoon. Also, about 20 minutes after eating is a good time. Good luck!
post #169 of 281
Bean's mama, sorry I missed your question. My boy is about the same age and also tends to be sensitive. I always just ask. It didn't take but a week or two before he understood the question and knew how to give me an answer, either by not paying any attention (this is a "no") or by crawling to the bathroom or starting to take off his diaper or later making the "toilet" sign back at me. When he'd sit on the potty I'd let him play with the water or read a book and when he was ready to get off again I'd just let him go. This works for us. Good luck!
post #170 of 281

Problems with EC...15 month old

I have browsed
numerous 'Diaper-Free' links looking for answers to my questions but
haven't found them. I have read Ingrid Bauer's book.

I started EC with my son (our only) around 6 months old. He did great.
We always caught the pees/poops after naps and gradually began to
catch about 75% of them during the day. I didn't try EC during
sleptimes...wanted to feel confident in catching them during the day
first. At first, I held him over the potty/sink, and he did fine.
Around 10 months, he would not be held, but began to use the Bjorn
potty. Sometime between 12 months and now (15 months), he began to
stiffen/arch more and more when placed on the potty. We began to catch
fewer pees and poops, and now, he won't sit on it at all. I haven't
caught one pee/poop in a week, and he walks around naked most days...
He just pees on the floor. He'll often run to a place that's out of
sight though.

We never did signaling/signing, but he would respond to our sss/grunt
with like sounds (sometimes) when he was going. I can read his signals
and know when he is about to go, but I can't get him to then go to the
potty. The only 'sign' I've gotten is when he throws his Bjorn potty.
Sometimes that means he needs to go! But now, I can't even get him to
sit on it then.

He is also at a defiant stage; often testing his limits. He likes to
run out into the street, scratch at my face, and throw things in the
dog's bowl just after I've told him 'No' about these things. He laughs
and thinks its funny.

Should we leave the potty alone completely? We use disposables, but I
am playing with the baby G diapers and using cloth sometimes at home.
I didn't plan on cloth, so all I have are the pre-folds that I put in
baby G pants.

I fear we may have given him a negative potty experience somewhere
along the line. We are always asking if he needs to go potty. Perhaps
we should stop? Today I had him in his baby pool diaperless, and all
of a sudden a huge poop squirted out. I screamed becuase I was just
totally shocked, and he started crying! Oh, I wish I could undo that
now. I held him gently and got us out of the pool, trying to be gentle
and loving, hoping to undo scaring him.

I don't want to give up completely, but what would you recommend?
post #171 of 281
My 19 month old is also diaper-free, and he is on such a pee strike that I just give up. Seriously, that is my best advice right now. I have a huge stack of old towels, and I casually mention it but never make an issue out of it. I figure that he just needs to go through this phase of control and recognition. He will get it eventually.
post #172 of 281
No fun is it, Wallacesmom? How long has Wallace been striking? When did you start with EC? Have you been able to notice any connection with teething/stress?

Jackson seems to be displaying SO many difficult traits right now. So defiant about everything. DH & I aren't totally set on our method of discipline, but we need to get there! He laughs at everything I do to dissuade him from something...

Like you, I suppose our sons are asserting their independance. Cleaning up the pee/poop is getting so old that I'm about to give up and put him back in diapers full time

Good luck to us both!
post #173 of 281
kimberlybpatt - we started at 9 months, and things went beautifully. He was getting it, never missed when we were out, could handle travel, etc., by 11 months. He has been consistently pooping in the potty (or with my help) since then, so I am grateful for that. I can't link this strike to anything other than developmental stuff, although I have come to terms with the fact that, as elegant as the bblp is from a design standpoint, it sucks for boys. I am going to have to get some of the other potties, which I don't like. He likes the bb training potty toilet topper best, but only for pooping or in the am and at night.

I don't make a discipline issue out of it at all. By toddler time, the no's can really pile up! I go with the Sears "biggie/smallie" approach, and if it's not safety it's a smallie and doesn't merit a "no." At this point, I can ask him not to do something and explain why, even if it isn't a safety issue, but that is very recent. Consensual living philosophy has been very successful in my family, and we have almost no power struggles.

So, I don't think it is necessarily something external causing the strike. I can't imagine what it must be like to be hearing his body for the first time, developing language for the first time, all these firsts. I really think just switching up the potty opportunities and laying back about it is going to be my approach.
post #174 of 281
kimberlybpatt- maybe it's not such a bad idea to go back to diapers for a little bit. If for no other reason than to just take the stress off the experience for both of you (or just you as it may be!). My ds is completely diaper free now but we still have our misses. He's just turned 2 and we started really late, I think 15 or 16 months. Our approach was very casual, diapers when out, some naked time when I had the energy at home. Then one day I thought he might be ready to just go with it and we gave up the diapers. That said, occasionaly he still asks for one so we do it.

I remember the 14/15/16 mos old time to be a real challenge for us. It was when we had to really figure out what our approach to things was going to be. I guess we also adopted something like the biggie/smallie approach that wallacesmum was talking about. At any rate, it might be worth it for your sanity to take a big step back from the situation. If you're uncomfortable going back to diapers completely, you could maybe offer the potty only in the am or just before bed/bath? Something low-key but at a consistent time every day? Or even just take a week or two completely off then slowly add back potty times or the occasional naked day?

I guess my encouragement would be not to think that if you choose to take a break you can't get back to where you are. But to think of it as a sanity break and just see where things go from there. best of luck! And remeber, this too WILL pass! It just seems like it won't
post #175 of 281
Were starting EC also, my daughter turns 8 months old tomorrow :-]
post #176 of 281
Here's what's going on right now. We are back to a few catches, sort of like in the early days of EC. Morning, poop anytime, maybe after nap, bedtime and night. The rest of the time I did go back to diapers (he consented or I wouldn't have done it) because of the peeing on the floor in stores problem. Now he is back to usually telling me that he has to go or is going, but won't let me take him to the potty most of the time. I realized that my husband has been gone 4-5 days/week for the whole of this strike, so I think it is related.

There is definitely control stuff going on, because he often doesn't want me to take his wet diaper off. I realized that he wanted to stand on the potty, like daddy, so we do that for all pees. I am getting some new potties to put around the house.
post #177 of 281
I tried EC and had good luck with it. Then, I went back to school, and I stopped. I REALLY regret stopping. I have decided to stop school. I thought it was too late with this one, but since reading through this thread, I think I'm going to start again, starting Friday, after finals.
post #178 of 281
My little boy is now 2 (25mths) and he is doing really well. We did start late and didn't have much luck with it but I think having him in undies at least part time since he was 18mths has helped him understand the sensation of being wet. He goes on the potty on his own. He wears nappies at night and is quite often dry in the morning. Very proud of my little one.
I think I will start EC earlier with next baby.
post #179 of 281
I'm glad I read (ok skimmed) the whole thread and not just the first several pages. Those first pages are full of people who said they were starting "late" at 6 months or 7 months or somewhere close to that age. But then I found more people who were starting even later than that, like us at 12-13 months old.

But we haven't really started yet. I offered several times a few weeks ago but it wasn't when she needed to go, then we went out of town and abandoned all ideas of it, and now we're back IN town and want to start up again, at least part time. I may have to wait until mid-March though b/c of some other "stuff" that's going on. Then I may have something come up then and will have to postpone it further... and further... and furrrrttttthhhhheeeerrrrr.... until it's really potty learning and not EC.
post #180 of 281

REALLY late starters

We started breifly with my son at 7 months, and then quit for a while and just now started back and it is like we had never stopped! We quit while I was working with my older child to get her to use the potty. I figured it was a fluke back then until I started him back up recently. It seems like somehow he remembered how to go on the toilet. He is almost 15 months now and I wonder how he would be doing if we had kept it up! We might have been finished! He goes in the potty about 5 times a day, but I figure that's a good start. Its a lot better off than all the other kids I know who are 3 years old and won't touch a potty! I think that no matter what age you start, any positive potty experience will help!
We haven't known anyone else to try this quite this early. A few tried to potty train but also used disposable diapers but no one tried it without diapers or with cloth diapers. No one we know has tried it before 1 year. It is just not done where we live. I guess it is not considered "traditional" even though it was practiced by our great grandparents! My husband thinks I'm crazy and I've been shy about telling anyone else what we are trying and that we are using cloths instead of disposables as a backup (most of my freinds consider cloths to be insanitary and that is the main reason they use disposables) I still haven't convinced my husband of how easy it is!
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