All I can say is... (another "date" vent)

[3for3hb]

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?????!!!! : :

Apparently my midwives are starting to think that my dates are really off and because I was still breastfeeding Willem when I got pregnant that even though I knew my LMP maybe my ovulation period was off... so they are thinking I'm closer to 39 weeks than 42 1/2. I've been consistently measuring for the 42 week date up till 3 weeks ago when I should have measured 39 I measured 38, and the past 2 weeks I've been measuring at 39 (mind you my belly is DROPPED way low (I have to wear a rebozo scarf thingy to support my belly otherwise my back muscles can't take the strain).

And they are saying that the baby just doesn't feel like a post date baby either.

So after all that has been going on these past few weeks, apparently I have about 3 more weeks to go on feeling like 'today might be the day/night'. I know we are all getting tired of pregnancy but why me? I'll know for sure when I get my u/s done on Friday morning. Dh is frustrated with me because I'm at the end of my rope and he's secretly thinking "I told you so" because he's thought my dates were off all along.

I feel like I have more "umph" because of the acupuncture but the labor stim last night didn't do a thing... and that's supposed to be a sign that I'm still not ready.

Three weeks from now is what? THANKSGIVING??? This is exactly what happened last time. I'm so friggin out of my mind right now. I'm willing to wait but I feel very screwed over (to say it nicely).

I just want to have this baby before I totally lose it
I feel so pressured... that I've been led along to think one thing and now that it's not really panning out the way they thought it would... I can't even fully express how I feel I'm so confused and frustrated.

Honestly, nothing against my midwives, they are great and supportive but I just don't understand why pregnancy takes me to the edge and nudges me off the cliff into a pit of insanity.

Can you imagine thinking you were a few days short of 43 weeks and now being told that you're probably not even full term yet (as in 40 weeks).

That's my vent... I'm sure you'll hear more of it later. :

[SoulJourney]

So sorry mama!!! I can relate to your frustration, really! I'm being seen by 50 different (ok...maybe not 50, but YKWIM) midwives and my *due date* is anywhere from November 15th to December 3rd!!!!! NO one can decide, my cycle has NEVER been regular, so I have NO ability in helping out with dates and it only makes me frustrated. SO...I'm anywhere from 36.5 weeks to 39.5 weeks...WHO KNOWS!!! I was measuring for a Nov. 15th DD consistently for weeks, then the measurement they got yesterday was 36!!!!! I know that everyone measures differently, and fundal height is not an accurate assesment, but D*MN!

Sorry...not trying to hijack your thread...just wanting to commiserate!!!

[flapjack]

Can I swear?? If not, take it for read that I'm doing it for you.
You CAN do this. You ARE doing this. Baby is coming, soon, and will be out in 21 days tops (otherwise we're going to the December DDC together.) All of those horrible niggles and contractions are lining your baby up into a really nice, comfortable position to be born, and to glide through your pelvis with the minimum of stress and inconvenience to you or to him. Think falling out accidentally. Think sneeze birthing. Babies on toilets, not realising that you're fully dilated. It's going to be a story you dine out on for years This is going to happen, and it's going to be fairly soon, and when you do then 6 years down the line you won't remember any of this or how bad it was (trust me, I went through this with Alex: everyone else remembers, but I didn't...)
I'm not spending as much time as usual on the boards, because I'm finding it very hard to be happy for other people when I'm spending so much time in labour-land, but if you need me, my pregnant partner in prodromal purgatory, you know I'm always on the other end of an email or PM...
Besides, if you ARE only 39 weeks, then maybe our babies can be born on the same day- which would be fitting, though highly uncool. Just a thought.

[3for3hb]

Thanks Helen, I'm printing out your post and posting it to my mirror in the bathroom and to my fridge....

[Godiva]

willemsmama! I know all about due date hell! I could have been due the 11th (which is the date that makes the most sense to me as I can't remeber having sex after his bday) or as late as the 25th. So I don't know how overdue I am. I've been preparing for this baby since 2 weeks before the 11th and every day since then has been, "well this could be it". You are so close though, even if it does end up that your due dates are wrong. You won't nessicarily have to go another 3 weeks, mabye you will go near your actual due date. Just a warning on the u/s to predict dates, they are off by +/- 10 days if done early in the first trimester and it increases from there, so by now the u/s could be off by +/- 3 weeks! Keep that in mind when they tell you your dates. You should be proud of yourself though. What if you had gotten induced at 42 weeks? You might have a premature baby right now. You are being such a good mom to let that baby grow as long as it needs to. Your baby knows how long it needs, not a midwife, not some Dr, not a machiene, and not you. You are doing more good for your baby then you could ever imagine by trusting it to come out when it says it's time.

[3for3hb]

Yeah bailey228, I know all about the u/s date inaccuracy. Trust me, I've read all the medical literature I could get my hands on. As a holistic chiropractor i don't go for all that modern medical technology has to offer, however, I truly feel that at this point if I don't get the u/s done and something goes wrong that I won't be able to forgive myself. It's so unlike the non-pregnant Monique to freak out about stuff like this... I'm sooooo trusting of my body. Don't remember what I said in my OP but the peace of mind I'll get from the u/s is not about the dates but rather about placental integrity and amniotic fluid levels... basically I NEED to know that the baby is safe. I was up at 2 am this morning and cried for about 2 1/2 hours straight, just freaking out thinking that maybe something is wrong with the baby. But there is a little voice telling me it's most likely going to be okay.

Poor dh, he came home and spent his whole lunch break playing with Willem and then cleaning. It's basically spotless downstairs right now . I think he was really trying to cheer me up/ create good laboring energy. I don't have the heart to tell him that my dates are probably off. Although I think that he thinks it and so it doesnt' matter. He even told his family & extended family that Thanksgiving plans are sort of null and void at the moment because it really depends on when the baby comes. (I can just imagine they are all starting to freak out because I'm still pregnant... for their sake I HOPE I deliver on Thanksgiving hee hee hee ).

Anyway, flapjack, I just wanted to say that I know what you mean about it being hard to be happy for someone else when we're in this prodromal purgatory. Especially when they go early or on their friggin date.
But I just can't seem to pull myself away from checking in here. I still feel a bit supported.

BTW, anyone who is having date issues is WELCOME to hijack this thread (peacefulmommy )... we all need to support each other even if it's just ranting and raving. It's good to get it out and have someone acknowledge you and what you are going through!!!

[Chi-Chi Mama]

just wanted to give you mamas some

hang in there! and don't forget to let us know when you have those babies!!

[samsmamma]

Hugs to you! It does seem a little weird to me that they would have thought one date and now think somethng completely different. And of course, having just had my u/s today I have to say that if you do have one and see that the baby is ok and the placenta and fluid look good and everything that that can be very comforting and may help you feel less crazed in the coming weeks, and that isn't a bad thing.

Let us know what you decide. I'm thinking of you!

[spiritmomma]

Flapjack: great advice. that post read alot like a prayer of positive energy and even though it wasn't addressed personally to me, I needed to hear it too, so thanks!

Peaceful Momma and Samsmamma: Hang in there ladies! There has never EVER been a pregnant woman who stayed pregnant forever! I am feeling the readiness too.

My MW told me probably this week, then when I went in on Monday she said, Hmm... Probably another few weeks. It's not like it's her fault that the baby isn't ready yet, but still. I am losing my gorgeous pregnant lady glow to a bitter, unkempt pregnant lady aura!

[kangaroo_mom]

Oh WOW! I just found this board! I've been lurking on mothering.com for a while, but never saw the due date lists! In anycase, I'm so glad to find a crunchy due date list. I've been hanging out on ivillage trying to be civil with all the inductions and c-sections, lol.

In anycase, I can SO relate to all this due date crapola! LOL Here's my story. I had 1 post-partum cycle in January, sometime after the 16th (my oldest DD's b-day). Three weeks later I had 3-5 days of brown spotting. At the time I thought it was just a light period since I was still nursing my 1 year old (who turned 1 in Feb.) I had been using an online charting program to chart my cycles, but then decided I didn't want to pay for it, and we weren't planning on any more kiddos for quite sometime, so I deleted the program without transferring my dates to paper. Then we wiped our hardrive due to virus issues and so there went my back-up files. When March came and I didn't get a cycle, I panicked and took a pregnancy test, which of course tested positive. I freaked out and assumed that since we were using condoms the whole month of Feb. as well as charting that I *had* to have gotten pregnant in January and that the light spotting in Feb. had been implantation bleeding. So I told my midwife that my last cycle was the last couple weeks of Jan. which put my due at around Oct. 20.

Fast forward to Oct. I kept measuring behind and measuring behind. I usually measure about a week behind with my kids, but I just was so small and my "due date" was approaching. So I decided to go in for an ultrasound to check on the placenta and amniotic fluid as well as dates and to hopefully put my mind at ease. It took forever to find a doctor who would do the ultrasound, since in my area midwives, although are legal, they are still looked down upon by doctors. So I finally find a family practicioner that I go see asking him about what I believe is slight heart arrythmia and then mention "by the way, I need a medical ultrasound to check for dates". So I get the ultrasound. The tech says I'm only measuring about 32 weeks. WTH? But he'll have to wait for official results from the radiologist. I was told this when I was thinking I was about 36 weeks. So, I wait for the results. I get a call back saying that I have to come back in for another ultrasound because they did not get a good view of the spine and the radiologist won't give an official report until they do. Unfortunately we only have 1 car, so I had to wait until that Friday to get in and get it done. I finally get a call back the following Wednesday (now about 1 week from my original EDD) and am told that I have FIVE WEEKS TO GO!!!! ARRRRGHHHHH!!!! So that light spotting in Feb. really was a light period and that means we got pregnant while charting and using contraceptives!!!

Okay, so I get set to wait it out until Thanksgiving. I get all excited thinking of the new Harry Potter movie coming out and silly things like that (hey, anything to help pass the time and take my mind off the horrible excrutiating pubic bone pain I've been having). Well, 2 weeks ago I go in for my midwife appointment and I'm suddenly measuring 39 weeks. So she tells me to go home, clean house, and get ready for baby any day. She sets my next appt. for the 10th (tomorrow) and says, "doubt you'll make it till then". Well, guess what, I'm STILL HERE!!! We've had a couple of false alarms, but nothing. I wonder what she'll tell me this time.

So anyway, I Feel Your Pain fellow prodomal due date sisters!

I'm glad I found you all and look forward to us all getting our babies out in a happy, peaceful (quick!) manner. After all this we all deserve to have fairly easy quick birthings! LOL

Take care,

Jenn ~
busy mama to 2 sweet princesses (ages 3.5 and 21 months) and EDD #3 supposedly any day now!

[MrsMoe]

Awww

[nataliekat]

I don't get why pregnancy has to take us to the edge. Why approx 40 weeks? Why not 35 weeks? When babe was really active and we didn't worry about how they were doing in there and we were still kind of comfortable, etc. Why wait until we're absolutely DONE?

In my case, I'm thinking maybe it's helping to overcome my nerves about birth. Like, okay I don't CARE how much it's going to hurt, I'll take anything over this. KWIM?

[bec]

This is exactly how I felt when I realized that the pregnancy calendar I was using to keep track was a week off! And that was only a week! I'm sorry. You will have your baby very soon.



Bec