What to expect when you're expecting...and expecting...and expecting...

[flyingspaghettimama]

Um, so now it's been a week past my due date. And I am going nearly mad with the waiting. Let's say I've never been a particularly patient person in normal life (and don't tell me the Universe is trying to teach me a lesson here - if so, it is going soooo unappreciated around this house.)...I thought I'd go early, so ha ha on me that here I am, jumping at the slightest contraction after weeks of contractions...

I have quit counting intensity and duration and minutes in between. It seems so very pointless. Is it possible to become completely cynical about the Miracle of One's Body? Plus, I am probably not going to induce even if I go one more week. I've tried various "natural induction techniques" with no labor profit but with a net financial loss...massage, potions, etc...

What do you other 40+ week mamas do? I made some birth announcements...I am trying to get out for walks...um, any other ideas? A nice happy medium between pointless worrying and blithe cynicism would be dandy.

And, something to combat the Magical Thinking...i.e. maybe if I post this on here, the baby will come TONIGHT! Yeah, that's it! Maybe if I wear this favorite shirt, then the baby will come! Oh wait, is that OCD?

[DreamsInDigital]

Oh you poor dear. I'm still 8 days from my EDD and about as impatient as you are! I can only imagine how I will be when I go past my EDD, which I'm notorious for. Both my boys were 11 days and 10 days past so I can only expect the same. I hope your baby comes soon!

[Gunter]

FSM- Just wanted to send you hugs. How do I know anything about what you are going through? I don't! But I like you and your very funny posts. Uhm...you will just be super ready when the babe does come.

Bet you have been over your checklist of things to do a million times, eh? Got lots of food on hand and bottles of water for the bedside? Did you freeze foods or muffins or bread? Ready to breastfeed? Dipes and cleaning stuff for them all ready? I don't know what else...I am thinking of all the things that we have pulled together quickly...Afterease or whatever herbs/meds you will take if needed after the birth? Soothing candles and lotions for the birth...lavender stuff was so awesome for me. Now I smell it and think of her wonderful birth.

Your babe will be here so soon and so healthy after staying in so long!

[Godiva]

yup, waiting sucks doesn't it? I've been waiting since the end of september! (lol yeah I thought she may come early as well! ) Stop trying to push the boulder! Nothing will get a baby out before it's ready. You've gone so far, another week is nothing compared to how long you've waited so far. Sit back and relax, and take some solace in the fact that it's not up to you. Your baby will decide when it's time. Try to accept this lack of control and trust that your baby will come when it is the best time for him/her to come. Get your SO to give you a massage, or rub your feet. Enjoy this last time you have when it's just you and baby.

[mainstreetmama]

I bet Martha Stewart never tried this...

Why not use the time to make comfrey ice packs? Just soak natural sanitary pads in comfrey tea and then freeze. Great for the first several hours after birth!

Actually, I just wanted to say that I feel for you. I always hated being late, and just tried to console myself that the baby would come when he/she was perfectly ripe.

Of course, my homebirth midwife always pushed hard on beer/pizza & orgasm as being the best ways to bring it on.

good luck,

-MainStreetMama

[samsmamma]

You could...

get a pedicure (though if you're like me, toes are hard to find these days)
cook stuff for after the birth - if you can reach the stove!
fold baby clothes. Again?

Just trying to think of something semi-humorous! I feel for you, and I hope baby comes soon! I became convinced last night that Karl is going to stay in forever and I'm going to be a miracle of modern science. And I'm 8 days till my due date. Or maybe 11. Ugh.

Hang in there! They really don't stay in forever! (Or so I'm told!)

[Frigga]

I'm not over due with this pregnancy, yet, but both my boys had to be induced . I was 2 weeks over with them, they were over 10 lbs, and I was miserable! I only hope that little Anya will come any day now. I don't know what it's like to miraculously go into labor, and I'm afraid I may miss it because pit labor is so much more intense. I know how you feel and honestly, there's nothing that will soothe it. I never could read because I couldn't concentrate on the book, same with crafts. Just thinking about babies made me upset and I had mad fits of jelousy over those who went early or naturally. I hope you're able to go soon and you get to meet your son! Healthy labor vibes your way!

[PicnicBear]

isn't it funny when people ask when you are due and you can say "x days ago"?


things to do:
write angry letters (see my "in defense of pregnant women" post)
dress up doggie in cute outfits
sleep as much as possible to pass time

kind of a random list, I know, but that's what I've been up to

[MrsMoe]

I totally understand everything you just said.

[LeAnnie]

I know it's really discouraging to be 'late'. I was post-date by 12 days with my daughter and wanted to hide in the bedroom because of all the focus on 'When?" "Has it happened yet" etc. This time, as we all are, I'm eager to go early, but it's up to baby and his Creator. They have a plan worked out which I'm not in on!
Just remember, though it is hard for mom and everyone else to wait, the baby is developing neurologically and putting on that cute little baby fat that will make him/her calm and snuggly.
Prayers for patience and contentment for all those who wait...

[HoneyTree]

Here's what I've been doing, with varying degrees of satisfaction:

Knitting
Washing the floors
Keeping the bathroom free of errant hairs
Baking to freeze
Planting a winter garden
Keeping sympathetic family and friends abreast of EACH new uncomfortable symptom or possible sign that labor is coming (emphasis on sympathetic -- preferrably those who have given birth and who can relate, or convincingly pretend to)
Taking the smaller dog on long walks, morning and evening
Taking naps
Making CDs of music I might like during the birth
Making thank-you cards for shower presents
Making lists (grocery, birth kit, things I don't want to forget or lose track of post-partum, things I wish I had the energy to do but don't [In case a hard-working fairy visits my house at night and wants to know what I need done still], etc.)

And no advice on the magical thinking -- I saw a beautiful black cat at my back window on my due date, and was SURE that meant I would be having my baby that day. No. I found my very first hemorroid yesterday, and was sure that to balance that out the universe would send me my baby. No. I made big plans for things to do today, and thought that surely I would get my baby today to thwart all those plans. No.

And I can't help but thinking these little beans are just messing with us, to see just how wacky our thought waves will get before we give up entirely. Crafty little suckers.

[MamaFern]

ive been keeping busy too lots of the same.. cleaning out closests and organising stuff.. vaccuuming ( trying to get all dog hai out of my bedroom.. so impossible..! even though she never comes in there.. ak) im right now weaving in loose end on knitting projects i finnished but didnt "finnish" going to go eat food at hindu temple and hope the walk and spicy food amkes me go into labour it seems we all hope something is going to help.

[flyingspaghettimama]

Thanks for the tips everyone, some of them I hadn't thought of. I get caught up in a cycle of "well, better not start X project, or make Y plans, the baby might come tonight!" Which of course, does not happen. Maybe (magical thinking) if I plan a WHOLE DAY of intense things, the baby will come. Right? (magical thinking) No time like the present to get started on reading "War and Peace," I say. (magical thinking)

BeTheEarth, I often wonder if the universe just has a twisted sense of humor - i.e. the black cat you saw actually portends hemorroids? Sure, why not?

Plagio, it is funny when people ask. I usually tell them I had the baby last Sunday but can't find him anywhere. Lately, though, I have enjoyed the brand-new line of questioning revolving around when exactly I'm going to get induced (er, hopefully never!) at the hospital (no thanks, please don't let it come to that!). Mr. Pitocin is an evil, evil dude, and I hope to stay far away. I will do just about anything (castor oil, noooo) except that route.

I really appreciate all the other ideas - and while I've gone through my checklist one, two, three hundred times, I do realize there's always something that could be done (CDs are still not done). I admire the freezer capacity of some of y'all - mine is stuffed already with various pumpkin-based baked goods.

mainstreetmama, nooope, I don't think Martha has comfrey sanitary napkins on her website, although I think I'll make some myself. I would love to see Martha get crafty with the natural birthing movement. What else could she offer? Crocheted placenta cozies? Embroidered nipple shields? Lavender-scented dead sea salts for the birth tub? Oh, Martha, you know you have it in you - if you'd just try.

[DreamsInDigital]

I wish I could say I was being productive with my waiting time. I've just been sitting on my butt doing nothing.

[zjande]

Besides obsessing over the baby's things & unpacking & repacking my hospital bags every 37 hours (you know, JUST IN CASE I forgot something the last 18 times I checked), I've been absorbing books. Lying in bed reading & reading & reading. And eating ice. Also I've been watching a lot more movies than I normally ever do. And I'm getting caught up on my photo album. I'm always about a year behind in getting pictures in there up to date. I've also started the baby's keepsake book. I started it off with the story of our baby shower & added pics, keepsakes, etc from the shower. Besides all that, I keep busy cleaning, like always.

And besides all THAT, I count down the days, minutes, hours to my edd, & analyze all the potential ways my labor could start & where my family will all be at that moment & how fast or slow my labor will go & how many times I will fall in love again with DP throughout the process.

[3for3hb]

I've been watching lots of movies, cleaning when the mood strikes me (not often anymore esp since dh has taken up A LOT of my slack in that area), reading to ds, checking in on MDC, keeping up with my freecycle lists, talking to my post-surgery-recovering mom who should now be looking into sueing her doc because of negligent complications, checking the TP for ds stuff, coming up with mental lists of things I want to do but really can't on my own (carry bins of clothes to the basement and set up my sewing machine in the office).

Really not much of anything specific except for passing time, I'm too tired to do much else. I've been twiddling my thumbs for a long time now and am really looking forward to Tuesday night.... I'm so tired of expecting something to happen though. I've given up on actually paying attention to my various contractions and sensations unless they are really intense.