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First dental visit and what to expect  

post #1 of 96
11/20/01 at 12:08am
Thread Starter 
My son Nathan is going to the dentist for his first check up in a few weeks. PLEASE anybody???? This child HATES doctors of any kind. He screams "no no no no no!!!!" and hides under anything he can- kicks and screams bloody murder. And that's just for getting weighed and measured! The pediatric dentist office we have the appointment with- the same guy I saw as a kid!- told me if he wouldn't sit there they'd talk to him nicely, then nurses would hold his arms and legs, and if all that didn't work they'd strap him to a papoose board! Talk about traumatizing the kid for life!!! He STILL hasn't gotten over his 2-year-old check at the dr.! I'm thinking it will just be a bust of an appointment. But they won't let parents go IN! They say it just makes them more scared and they won't know who to listen to. Well maybe, but then how will I know when to say "enough is enough" and get my kid before he's traumatized???
post #2 of 96
11/20/01 at 12:35am
I tell you what, we just took our 5 yr. old to our general dentist to discover that he has 7 cavities (and yes, we have brushed his teeth since he started getting them) and were given the option of taking him to a ped dentist but when I heard that I couldn't go back with him I decided against it. DS just went to have 2 of the cavities filled this afternoon with our dentist and did beautifully. I figured he'd freak when he saw the needle headed toward his mouth but he was perfect. Are you taking your son because you suspect problems or because he was referred? If you don't think he has any problems I'd put it off until he's a little older or at least find a dentist that will let you go back with him. I also gave my DS the added incentive of telling him he could pick out a toy at the Dollar Tree if he was brave and calm. That really motivated him. Just a thought.
post #3 of 96
11/20/01 at 10:20am
Can you get a new dentist? We go right back with our ds and he comes with us for our appointments. Maybe if he sees you get a check up, he'll relax a little.

Just an idea.
post #4 of 96
11/22/01 at 4:00pm

DO NOT GO!

Do not subject your son to this treatment, unless you feelcomfortable with him being treated this way ( I sure wouldn't!). Surely there is a pediatric dentist out there who would respect your wishes on this issue.

This could traumatize your son to the extent that he'll never let you take him in again.

s
post #5 of 96
11/22/01 at 4:01pm

p.s.

Any dentist that doesn't let parents come in isn't worth it at all. I mean, at least if strangers are holding your poor baby down and you're there, you can hold his hand and try to explain what's going on. There's no excuse for them trying to block you out.

s.
post #6 of 96
11/22/01 at 6:01pm
i agree. Our dentist has no problem with me and siblings being in the room. My 3ys old ds went to the dentist for the first time and needed to hold my hand and I talked to him without getting in the way of the dentist--actually hygenist. No problems.
post #7 of 96
11/26/01 at 5:46pm

When should he go to the dentist for the first time?

I was just wondering when children are suppose to go to the dentist for their first check up? I have a 2.5 year old and he hasn't gone yet.
post #8 of 96
12/6/01 at 1:21am
Thread Starter 

Well tomorrow is the big day....

Nathan goes in for his very first dental visit. They don't let the parents in the room with the kids- I think that's probably for t he best as Nathan will act up more if we are there and there wouldn't be anything I could do anyway. He either gets his teeth cleaned or he doesn't. There isn't much middle ground on compromise . This dentist was my dentist as a kid and specializes in ped. patients only.

I'll update you tomorrow! The appointment is 8:45 a.m.
post #9 of 96
12/6/01 at 10:49pm
Thread Starter 

It Went Well

Nathan had his first dental appointment this morning. It went fairly well they said. The nurse had to carry him out of the waiting room, though. But once he was in there I guess the worst he did was spit the water on things instead of in the bowl. He didn't get xrays, though. And Nataleigh had her teeth looked at- he says he thinks she's grinding her teeth or that she chews on toys because they are chipped. She was not happy being examined with some big old man with surgical gloves on! Oh well. This is the same guy I had as a kid! He specializes in pediatric dentistry. After that ordeal I told Nathan I had a surprise for him. But we stopped at the mall first to change diapers, etc. and Nathan actually said he wanted to go see Santa- all on his own thinking. So we did. And we got a pic of me and the 3 kids and Santa. I am too lazy to scan it right now and had I planned ahead, I could've gotten a disk with our pic on it but I didn't have that much cash at the time. Some how I'll scan it, though. Its pretty cute. Nataleigh's mad, but oh well. Anyway, then we went to Chuck E. Cheese's to make up for the tooth trauma and spent 2 1/2 hours there. I tell you I was worn out! They had a blast, though. Then we went back to my mom's to give Noah a nebulizer treatment. The kids wouldn't nap, though. But they are in bed at the moment so I guess it was worth it! Oh and my sister had her surgeries- breast reduction and tummy tuck. I guess it all went just fine. One of these years I'm going to get a breast reduction. I have a love-hate relationship with my breasts- they feed Noah, but they are too dang HUGE! I feel like its me with some weights on me, instead of that they're part of me.
post #10 of 96
12/11/01 at 12:03am
I know what you mean about the boobs! LOL!

I hope Noah is okay. I didn't know he was on a nebulizer; poor little guy, he's still so tiny!

Is the tummy tuck awful? I think about it sometimes, after the twins. I don't want to spend the rest of my life tucking my stomach into my waistband...

Between the dentist, Santa, and Chuck E., it sounds like y'all had a heck of a day! It makes me tired just thinking of hauling them all in and out of the car seats!

Glad it went well!
post #11 of 96
12/11/01 at 1:11am
Smilemamma, I wish more then anything that you were in Nashville. If you remember me, I'm the one who posted the pic's of my dd's teeth. They are not any better, but I still haven't taken her to the dentist. I'm scared to take her to the dentist. She flips if any stranger comes near her. She is 16months old now. I don't have a dentist, so when I find one, I'm afraid if I bring her in they will be upset with me. I also don't want them to know that she isn't vax'd and hasn't been to a doctor since she was 2 weeks old. Will they even ask those questions? If they do, can I lie? I wish I could trust a dentist to tell me honestly what my options are with her teeth, based on fact and not how much money they can get or what is "normally" done. I don't know what to do. Being a parent is so hard, I just don't know what to do. I want to do the right thing for Amanda, I just don't know what the right thing is....
post #12 of 96
12/11/01 at 1:49am
Hi Amanda'smom! I sure do remember you and Amanda! You are amazing on the computer, girlfriend! When I went to your post and actually saw *teeth*! Wow!

First, breathe! In .... out .... in .... out ... good. No one said this was an easy job; that's what makes it so rewarding. You are doing the most important thing in the whole world, and best of all, you are doing it *mindfully*. You are evaluating, testing, researching, everything, not just blindly going with the flow (Just Wondering once said only dead fish go with the flow... )What a lucky baby!

C'mon, mommas, anyone have an awesome dentist in Nashville? Someone posted something on a dentist who seemed pretty good in Missouri... I know they're out there! Try asking at your local La Leche League, or at your natural foods store. Maybe even AP International has a database. Mothering has a database of healthcare providers, too, just call them, maybe they know of someone nearby.

Anyway, it won't come to that because you'll find someone you trust, someone who will be a partner with you in helping Amanda stay healthy. Good luck, honey. And you DO know what to do, you can hear it in that small, soft voice in your heart. Just listen to it, and use the information you get from whoever you see to make your decision, and it won't be wrong.

{{{{{hugs}}}}}
post #13 of 96
12/12/01 at 9:30pm
great question.

my dentist did not want to see my baby until he is 4 or 5 YEARS.

I think that is awful.

I am going to switch dentists and find one that is kid friendly.

im planning to take him around two years of age.

im glad this was asked and answered.

i am really crazy about nice teeth.
post #14 of 96
12/14/01 at 12:08pm
My dd is 2.5 and has been to the dentist twice, mainly because the sitter fell through when I went for 6 month cleanings. DD sat in her stroller next to me (in the chair), and they gave her a stuffed dog with human looking teeth to play with. After the hygenist and dentist finished with me, dd got to sit and ride in the chair, they showed her how to brush using the dog, looked in her mouth quickly and gave her a toothbrush and a toy. They called it a "happy" visit, and I was not charged for it. The first time she was 1.5, the second time she was 2. Her first official visit will be after her third birthday.

I had a horrible experience with my dentist as a child. He pulled all my baby teeth for reasons I can't quite understand other than for the money. Most dental experience I had throughout childhood and adolesecense was painful. I was terrified of dentists, and neglected my teeth for years, partly out of fear and partly because I couldn't afford to go. About 5 years ago I got dental insurance thru my job and found a great dentist thru word of mouth (of other dentist phobes). It took about two years to clear up the problems I had amassed through improper hygiene and neglect, including early stages of gum disease (which I've managed to reverse). I don't want my dd to have the same fear and miseducation of hygiene, so I'm probably a little zealous about the dentist issue. My dentist is gentle, thorough, and easy to talk to. She enables her patients (most of whom had bad dentist experiences as children) to take care of their teeth themselves, making her job easier. I actually enjoy getting my teeth cleaned! She's also great with children. When you've seen the worst, it's easier to identify the best...
post #15 of 96
1/8/02 at 10:08am
this is soo me too!!!!!! not the pulling part but the terrorized

and as a kid i couldnt stand toothpaste - the mint burned my mouth and back then we only had crest or colgate

in my early 20's i didnt have dental insurance and didnt dare try the cheap places because i had been terrorized enough

and now its not going to be cheap or pretty and i'm pretty scared about teh whole thing but i need to have it done

and why is it that the professionals (as a generality) think that bad dental care makes you a bad/lazy/whatever person? i think folks can have some pretty understandable reasons for what they've done

dont know much about smilemomma but you seem to have more compassion than any dentist i've ever met -- i'm ready to book my flight to see you : )



Quote:
Originally posted by Parthenia
[B
I had a horrible experience with my dentist as a child. He pulled all my baby teeth for reasons I can't quite understand other than for the money. Most dental experience I had throughout childhood and adolesecense was painful. I was terrified of dentists, and neglected my teeth for years, partly out of fear and partly because I couldn't afford to go. About 5 years ago I got dental insurance thru my job and found a great dentist thru word of mouth (of other dentist phobes). It took about two years to clear up the problems I had amassed through improper hygiene and neglect, including early stages of gum disease (which I've managed to reverse). I don't want my dd to have the same fear and miseducation of hygiene, so I'm probably a little zealous about the dentist issue. My dentist is gentle, thorough, and easy to talk to. She enables her patients (most of whom had bad dentist experiences as children) to take care of their teeth themselves, making her job easier. I actually enjoy getting my teeth cleaned! She's also great with children. When you've seen the worst, it's easier to identify the best... [/B]
post #16 of 96
1/16/02 at 4:16am

1st trip to ped dentist, can i VENT??

today i took dd to her first visit with a ped dentist. she is 15 mos. and has 14 teeth, so i thought i'd be really on top of things and make an appointment and get myself educated about how to care for her little teeth. i also wanted to see if they could do anythign about the stains on her 4 top front teeth that she got as a result of a iron supplement we gave her for anemia (from about 8-10 months old).

first of all, i walk in the office and there is not a single toy in the waiting room. this is a PEDIATRIC dentist, folks. there weren't even any kids magazines. just a tv set (way up high, and turned down really low so you couldn't even hear it) tuned to the cartoon network. secondly, the receptionist was a nasty nasty woman. she acted like it was a big hassle for her to answer a single question or copy my insurance card.

but it gets way worse (or i wouldn't be here venting!) i wrote on the info card that dd is nursing 6-7x/day. becausei thought that was important info for a dentist to know. well, the dental assistant who takes up in to the office immediately looks at the iron stains ans says, "that could be decay. you should stop breastfeeding immediately." i told her in no uncertain terms that that was out of the question. she said that the "acid in the milk" is causing her teeth to decay (she hadn't even looked at her teeth closely, just glanced at the stains). and ACID in my milk?? sheesh. maybe she should educate herself before she makes such broad statements, eh? so than she's hostile to me for the rest of the appointment, i nearly walked out. ooh, and this part is good, she says, "what does her pediatrician say?" (about nursing) and i reply, "she's fully supportive of (dd) nursing for as long as she wants, and so are the american academy of pediatrics, by the way!"

then some other woman came in (maybe she was another dentist in the practice? i'm not sure because she didn't bother to introduce herself). but she looked at dd's xrays and her teeth and said they looked terrific. not a bit of decay. then the assistant polishes her teeth and the iron stains mostly disappear (smilemomma: they weren't permanent!! hooray!)

anyway, we never got to see the dentist. he didn't even stop in and introduce himself. the evil assistant "insisted" that i make another appointment for dd in 6 months, and i told her i'd call her in 6 months. HA. like we'll go back there.

i'm so frustrated and angry. :mad: i may write a scathing letter to the dentist and enclose some studies on breastfeeding benefits to chidren's developing jaws, etc. mostly i'm mad for all the women who aren't as well informed as i am, who may actually wean their babes on the spot because this boob ('scuse the pun!) is telling them it's gonna rot their kids teeth.

thanks for listenign folks. and if you know a good ped dentist in the san francisco area, please let me know!
post #17 of 96
1/16/02 at 11:58am
No offense to Smilemomma, but I have not yet found a pediatric dentist who is educated other than at dental school. Guess they don't know education doesn't end when you graduate.

Your experience is similar to mine. The first dentist we went to, who ss has been seeing all his life, hires stupid people. After dd's first and only visit there, within hours, she fell on her front teeth and refused to have her teeth brushed. WEll, when I called the dentist's office for help they acted as if I was crazy-that was not their role to help with those kind of issues. The receptionist said, "If it was my child I would show them who is boss". So I asked if she was advocating holding dd down and forcibly brushing her teeth and SHE SAID YES!

Our new dentist is ok. THey really want to give dd xrays and I said maybe when she is 5. THey act like I have no say in the treatment I BUY for MY CHILD.

Sorry to rant on. Hope you can find an educated practitioner!
post #18 of 96
1/18/02 at 7:40pm
IKWYM. Same goes for Drs with us. Hard to find a suitable person. (and by that, I don't mean they must agree with everything we dicide/do/want/don't want, but they must at LEAST respect those decisions and treat us with a certain level of respect as well!)
Have you tried doing a serch on-line under something like Holistic dentistry? There are groups out there who offer directories of practicioners. Also, try mercury free dentistry(as many are holistic in general and open to concepts more conventional ones might not be). I imagine there are a few in a city like San Fran.
I had a heck of a time finding a merc free dentist for my son(after his first terrible appointment with the clinic our insurance sent us to!) Finally, an accupunturist at a local health center gave me a referral. Great experience, and he printed us out a list of fellow merc free dentists in the state we were moving to soon.
Good luck, and don't give up; they ARE out there! Kimberly, mom to Forest, 9 and Lily, 2
post #19 of 96
1/24/02 at 9:54pm

Requesting Non-fluoride cleaning, no "treatment"??

Smilemomma (or anyone else with experience in this matter)
My ds goes to a new dentist on Tuesday.(a referral from our dentist, and also a non-merc. practice).
I don't intend to allow fluoride treatment or use of fluoride containing cleaning compound. On another thread, SM, you stated that one could simply request a non-fluoridated product be used.
My question; how best to present this? is there a particular term for such products? I am not concerned about disapproval; I have gotten way past that by now, lol!, but more with being clear and presenting as someone who knows what they are requesting/demanding(as ime, otherwise, some will assume they can disregard your wishes with impunity.) Yes, I also hope this dentist would never do such a thing, but I have seen it before.
Any advice, as a parent or professional, on how best to raise the issue/phrase the request, etc? thanks! Kimberly, mom to Forest, 9 and Lily, 2
post #20 of 96
1/24/02 at 10:48pm

Flouride

I just took my son into the dentist for his first cleaning. I simply said, after doing a lot of research on both mercury and fluoride, I have decided that I don not want either of these substances in my childs mouth. Is this going to be a problem for us in your practice, or is there a way we can work together? My dentist does not use mercury fillings so that was easy. He does recommend fluoride cleaning and sealants, but he was completely ok with respecting my wishes. He wrote NO FLOURIDE on the front of my ds chart, and we were able to have a non-flouride cleaning. In spite of all that I was warned about night nursing, my 6 yo had no!!cavities. (He night nursed until he was 4 and 1/2}
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