Weekly Chat: Nov. 21-28 ~ Get your gripe on!!

[*Amy*]

Alright. This is our last full weekly thread before we all become December mamas. I'm glad I know a few people over there, including my best friend littlemomma!

So anyway. My cramps have been really picking up and I even had an actual contraction last night. One! It was enough to get me excited though. Every day it seems I am having more pressure/discomfort, but still no bloody show (although I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything). I have baby dreams every night now - last night I dreamt that I looked down and saw her emerging from the birth canal.

Not much else to say I guess. I'm going back to bed because I'm delirious from being so damn tired the past two days.

So who is it going to be this week? Definitely not Helen; she's still got like what, 4.5 weeks til Christmas?

[3for3hb]

I AM SENDING ALL THE MAMAS IN WAITING PATIENT, and LOVING LABOR VIBES . I know you all know that your babies will come in the perfect time... and I KNOW how hard it is. But I just want to remind you how miraculous it is going to be when you hold your baby for the first time (outside of your body). May you all fall in love as deeply as I am... love that will make you forget all the grumpiness, all the discomfort, all the depressing moments, all the worry, and especially all the heartless and thoughtless things people are saying to you... and make you want to do it all over again!


Thank you for all the wonderful things you all said to me when I was still in that pregnant limbo stage. You all got me through some really tough days emotionally when I was still pg. It's been almost a week since our still nameless baby boy was born. I've been having the most rewarding postpartum time so far. Dh has become my postpartum doula . Until he returns to work full time next Monday he has taken over all the housework and Willem-work, has put our room back together after getting all the birth stuff put up, and has made sure that I have only the best nutrition by catering to my every craving whim, and made sure my stock of movies and books are replenished often so I don't have the excuse of being bored to get me off my rest and doing stuff. He's had a lot of slack to take on because other than my one IRL-MDC friend, we really don't have anyone around to help (his family is basically ignoring the fact that we just had a baby. But we're so happy we just don't care about them). I can't believe how drastically different I feel, not only physically, but emotionally as well as compared to my postbirth experience with Willem. Don't get me wrong, my body is still VERY achy, and my split in my nether-regions is still not quite healed but other than that, I'm completely fulfilled in this postpartum bliss and not at all worried about having to handle two children once Dh is back on his regular schedule. Willem is in love with his newborn brother.... his face lights up everytime he sees him. And he can't stop kissing him !

[HoneyTree]

Morning, mamas.

Willemsmama, thanks for the vibes -- I am in sore need today. Yesterday was my worst day yet as far as handling this overdue thing emotionally. I just worked myself into the WORST mood, and could not find my way out of it. I paced the house, knowing that no place I could sit or lie down would be comfortable; I ignored everything I know about nutrition and just ate on a store-bought pumpkin pie all day; I asked DH to take me on a bunch of little errands, just to get out of the house, only to ask to be brought home again because the car exacerbated the stomach ache that was plaguing me. I could go on, but I think you get the picture. This waiting thing is getting really really tough.

But this morning my midwife called and said she had spoken with our mutual-friend acupuncturist this weekend, and that although she wasn't having any office hours, that she would gladly work up an induction session at her house for me. So I may make that the plan of the day.

Sigh... sorry for the downer post, ladies. It just doesn't feel like a glib or funny morning to me. Any and all alternative perspectives on this 41-week + thing most welcome...

[LeAnnie]

Due dates have to be the cruelest aspect of modern pregnancy! I'm 2 days past now and think if I had not been branded with a date, I'd be more relaxed and patient. Next time I think I'll totally reject any due date and consider a due month instead. Dd was born spontaneously at 40 weeks plus 10 days. It was sooo hard waiting, but once it happened we were all in love and any bad vibes just disappeared.
Taking it one day at a time! Glad to know there are others out there...

[snugglebutter]

Still here! Dh has the whole week off so that will be fun. We are leaving shortly for my midwife appt - then we are going someplace fun for lunch and running a few errands.

I did nest a bit this weekend...... did tons of laundry, made 2 lasagna's for the freezer, decluttered a bit, organized the baby's room a little more and got my hospital bags more ready. Got my 90 minute massage on Saturday and it ROCKED. She did some accupressure and I did have contractions for about 3 hours that night but they went away.

Hope everyone is having a happy week!

[bec]

I'm going to be 39 weeks on Wednesday. DH (who I told you was spooked by the idea of accupuncture), spoke to the midwife (who had led me to believe that I could use an accupuncturist to get labor moving at this point), who told him that she wouldn't recommend it to kick start labor right now, but to help with discomfort, pelvic positioning, blah, blah, blah. : I very nearly burst into tears on the phone with him.

I'm tired, I'm sore, my wrists hurt from tendonitis and a wrist adjustment gone wrong by my chiro (the first thing she has ever done wrong, as far as I can tell), and my almost 2 year old is acting out unbelievably. I just don't have the energy, patience, or physical endurance to chase her around the room to deal with her. I have a hard time picking her up at this point, and when I try to hold her hand, she does the boneless leg thing where she just makes herself into nigh on 30lbs of sudden dead weight. Not good for my sore wrists. She has slipped through my grasp a couple of times and fallen on the floor as a consequence , but hasn't really learned not to do it. Thankfully, it hasn't happened on concrete or in a parking lot (yet).

Not to mention that I am scared to death that this baby is going to have a cleft palate like Emily. I don't know, honestly, if I have another year of pumping in me. I just don't know if I can. So, I've been feeling guilty before I even know if there's a problem!

Ugh, was this supposed to be a venting thread? I'm just at the end of my rope physically, mentally, and emotionally.


Bec

[AmyGirl28]

Well this weekend was nice. We celebrated DH's Birthday. His actual Birthday is today, and I was so hoping to go into labor! Not yet. I have an OB appointment this morning. I am dreading the internal because the last 3 times I have been 0, nada, zip, zilch, zero. I don't know if I can handle the let down if she says I haven't dialated at all. I know you can go from 0-10 in one day of labor, but I just wish I was making some progress. DH and I are going to try to have sex every day this week to get things going. I honestly don't think I could do more than once per day. Good luck ladies! Wouldn't it be great if we could all have November babies and not have to move to the December board?

[MamaFern]

41 weeks 1 day..its my auntie's birthday...ive decided that if im still pregnant on wed after my midwife appt im going to try castor oil ( as long as they okay it). i just REALLY want this baby in my arms.. i think it would be worth having to sit on the toilet for a few hours ( and yes ive researched it and researched it).. but ive told baby.. so that still gives her a few days to decide to come out on her own. and i guess there is always the possibility that it wont work.

i really want to have baby before sat or after because its the annual waldorf christmas fair and i always get elwynns christmas/birthday presents at it. if i end up having the baby that day i will be so sad! its such a beautiful fair.

anyways, im feeling pretty good. the house is in good shape for baby, whenever she decides to come.. and my SIL is coming for the day/sleepover again so it will be a kid full day.. at least days that are full pass fast.

to everyone in the same place as me. its so HARD! im 2 weeks more pregnant than i ever was with elwynn..its amazing how each pregnancy and child is so different..ii just wonder so much what this little one will be like..look like.. smell like.. feel like.

[flapjack]

Better day today: the stretch and sweep hurt more than dental extractions, labour and goddess only knows what else, and I disgraced myself with a fit of a giggles during the sweeping bit. I have got an induction date (which would have been my dad's birthday) though I'm at liberty to not attend, if I so wish...
Mamas of little boys, you need this in your life:
www.jcbsong.co.uk/jcbvideo.asp
(the reason for today's crying jag... it's just SO Isaac) Other than that, everything is going well- labour may be kicking off, it may not, but hopefully I'm going to have this baby any day other than Thursday, which is Alex's birthday, and everything will be OK.
And remember, ladies, only 33 shopping days to go until Christmas: AND I'M ON MATERNITY LEAVE! What more could I possibly want?

[3for3hb]

Aww Helen, that was so cute!

[zjande]

OMG Amy, I hadn't thought about how this will be our last chat thread til Dec! AAaaarrrrgh! May we ALL have our babies this week! DP keeps teasing me about having a Christmas baby...... ug I'm soo going to kick him in the shin one of these days..

Willemsmama, your post is adorable & THANK YOU!

I'm having a typical day so far... they usually start off pretty dandy, I feel all right. Then as my day progresses I nearly always get grumpier & achier & more impatient & frustrated. I swear, I am just forcing myself to do projects to keep myself busy. Otherwise I start to just about lose it within 15mins. of doing nothing. I am on the edge of sanity!

I started this giant project over the weekend. I've had these 2 huge bins + another big pile of keepsakes from my kids, my ex-marriage, my friends, family, etc etc, saved up over the past *14 years*. DP carried the bins into the family room & I proceeded to empty them into piles alllll over the whole floor, bought a zillion binders, & started keepsake books & albums for each person/subject/whatever that I've been collecting for the past decade & 1/2! It's a monstrous project, but wow it's been fun to come across keepsake goodies I haven't seen for years. Like I found my birth pictures from my son born 7 yrs ago- it was so fun to look at them with him! There is this GREAT picture of me pushing my son out while YELLING in pain. The picture is so clear, my son is bloody, my face is pure pain.... it's a great picture, but it makes me ask myself, "OMG, I chose to do that AGAIN?? What is WRONG with me???"

At today's MW appt (I mentioned this in another thread), while she was checking me for any cervical changes (none), she felt the baby's hair! I just love that. Our baby is soo low that she can just reach her fingers up there & poke our baby in the head! BUT, the thing I kept thinking about afterwards is sex!! If my MW can just stick her fingers in there & touch the baby's head, how on earth does our baby feel when DP & I are doing our thing & the baby is getting poked directly in the head over & over & over again?!! And EWww, did *I* get poked in the head by MY dad's penis when I was a fetus???

And, one more thing I wanted to mention to those of you that are also not having much/any cervical changes or dilation, the day before my son was born I had an OB appt. At that appt she told me I wasn't dilated or effaced at all & I was soooo frustrated (I was past my edd). But the very next day at noon, I went into labor & he was born 7 hours later. So, I keep reminding myself that no dilation yet really doesn't mean anything. One can go from zero dilation to birth within hours!

Well, I'll take my chatty self away now & go obsess about going into labor.

[BensMom]

Hi Mamas! I was so hoping that the rest of the gang would have had their babies by the time I got back online! The waiting game is so hard.

But what a prize!

Willemsmama is right on the DH acting as PP doula. You mamas might want to prepare your DHs now. Mine is a sweetie, but I tell ya, after one full day of doing *my job* he is pretty worn out. And if you can get family to help with the errands and the light cleaning, that would even be better. I forced DH to sit for 5 mins and hold his little girl, since the poor guy has been chasing Ben all day and was pretty frustrated.

Sending lots of labor vibes and I hope you can all avoid inductions!

[DreamsInDigital]

So I'm officially overdue now, my due date was yesterday. Now I don't have a date or a goal or anything to look forward to. Everything is just like a great big ? in the middle of it all. I hope I don't have to join the December DDC. I really don't want to go 11 days past my due date.
But that is only 10 days away. I guess this can't go on forever, right?

[PicnicBear]

DID -- here I am at 11 days past -- ahh, and the emotions . . thanks, willemsmama for the good vibes, so there is light at the end of this tunnel.

BTE, zjande, and (almost) everyone else -- I am in the same boat with mood swings, bouts of depression. It's worst when I get up in the morning and realize that, no, I did not go into labor overnight and yes, I have to face another day. If I didn't have the pressure of induction looming over me I think I would be so more patient. I get really angry at the medical establishment for putting us "on the clock" like this. DH is great about encouraging me though and supporting my decisions 100% -- it's great we have the same philosophy of things of this sort, i.e. letting nature take it's time so I have him by my side through all of this.

I'm thinking of spending some serious $ on tickets for a Phil & Friends show this Friday night (the bassist from the dead and his band). That would be a nice way to celebrate my 42 weeks and 1 day status, right? Maybe the music would get the baby out?

[MelW]

to all of those still waiting, especially the patient post-dates mamas!

I've survived a crazy growth spurt over the past couple of sleepless days and nights. My baby is now huge, and at times has tried to chew my nipples off. She's back to a more normal rate of breastfeeding again (I hope)- but did some marathon cluster feeds that almost sucked the life out of me. I still cannot get her to latch on well in side-lying, so we spent a LOT of time on the couch over the past week.

When not being the Neela monster, she's usually really cute and cuddly. I love her to bits, and am wishing you all babies in your arms very, very soon!

[Chi-Chi Mama]

aww mamas

time is such a strange thing.. for the most part, a few days or even a few weeks fly by so fast.. I can't believe how fast the past nine months of this pregnancy flew by, yet the last week and a half seems to have gone on forever

I too think I'd be a lot more patient without the time pressure. Not something I have to worry about for another week +, but still. Just knowing it's there sucks.

since it doesn't seem like this baby is coming before tomorrow morning (never know, but it will be just my luck) I have to go to work tomorrow so that's my gripe for now

[Chi-Chi Mama]

oh, and Fern, I did castor oil with dd (different story, it was actually 8 days before her 'due' date, but my midwife suggested I take it because I had no contractions to speak of and my waters had broken about 15 hours prior.. that dang time pressure)
in any case, it wasn't all that bad. I think it did get things going, just very slowly. In my case, didn't really see much downside. best of luck!!

I think it's something I might try if I'm still pregnant in a week and a half or so

[HoneyTree]

Plagio, I'd heartily endorse the Phil & Friends show -- tonight I have been listening and trying to dance a bit to a '71 recording of the Philmore East show. I found that imitating silly dead head girls who all do that same willow-in-the-wind, hip-swivelly dance kind of gets my almost-contractions to move closer together...

So this afternoon I had my acupuncture session, only my acupuncturist used heat instead of needles. Did anyone else have this done? It's really cool, I think. The point (again, haha -- acupuncture lends itself to puns, no?) is the same -- to activate the meridians around the uterus and encourage contractions -- but you use a really tightly rolled paper cigar thing to heat up the points. She sent us home with one of the rolls so that we could do another session at home when we wanted. And she was so up front with the fact that acupuncture can only encourage a baby who is a little too comfortable, that if the baby is not ready for whatever reason, then it is not going to work. She told me a story of her own home birth-turned c-section because of triple-wrapped cord, and that she realized afterward that that was the reason all her best efforts were not helping her baby to drop. That being said, contractions really started up about an hour after my session. They've tapered off some now, but I was really encouraged by that.

She also asked me if I had been visualizing the baby's birth, and I said that I had, but that I never seem to get past the baby's head in the birth canal -- after that I find myself getting distracted, or onto a whole different thought. She suggested I try to meditate on whatever blocks I might have to seeing the birth to its finale. I hadn't even thought of mental or emotional blocks; I thought I was just a crappy meditator! So tonight I'm planning on taking some time to do that.

[Godiva]

to all the still waiting mamas, trust me I know how much it sucks. Waiting 45 weeks for my baby was the hardest thing in the entire world. I could have sworn up and down that I had been pregnant my entire life and would still be pregnant til the day I died. Twards the end, I had just made peace with the fact that she would never come out. Finally I was woken up at about 3:30 am with contractions about a minute apart. Out of the blue I was in hard labor with no warning signs at all. My Caia had finally decided that now was the perfect time to come out. The second she was born, I completly forgot about how miserable I was pregnant. When I held her for the first time, it felt like being pregnant was a distant memory from years ago, even though just seconds before I was still pregnant. Every time I hold her now or wake up to her beautiful sleeping face on my chest I know that I would do it all again in a heartbeat. Every miserable day I spent waiting for her was one day that brought me closer to holding her in my arms. I wish all the waiting mamas can make peace with the waiting game and I hope all of you are soon gazing into your baby's beautiful eyes.

[*Amy*]

BTE, sounds like you had a really cool acupuncturist (is that a word?). That is so interesting about your visualization block! I keep getting stuck in my visualization because I can't figure out if I should imagine giving birth in the tub or not. Maybe I should think about that. Speaking of cord around the neck, I had this really intense fear about that this morning for some reason. I have to keep reminding myself to stop imagining the worst (cord problems, going so far past due that I can't birth at the birth center, etc). Bec, sorry to her your hubby is not willing to try acupuncture. That really bites.

But in happier news, I'm getting a massage today - yay! My doula is a massage therapist, so she'll be giving me a good rub-down and stimulating my acupressure points as well. I don't have hugely high expectations or anything, but I figure it can't hurt to give it a try.

Bailey, Mel, and Jenn....it's good to hear stories from the "other side." I can't imagine wanting to ever be pregnant again, and I have had like the easiest pregnancy ever! Do you really forget how annoying it all gets in the end? Hard to imagine!!

Man is anyone else going from feeling normal to completely exhausted within a couple of minutes? I woke up feeling good this morning (I slept pretty well last night), made myself and DH breakfast, and then it's like suddenly I need to go back to sleep! That happens throughout the day with no warning. It's weird.

Oh and my good news is that I haven't gotten *any* calls or emails asking about the baby since I've started updating my webpage daily. It only takes me about 1 minute in the morning, so it's totally worth it!