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"I hope there's no men in your class"  

post #1 of 19
Thread Starter 
UGH. Today we had Thanksgiving dinner with dh's familiy. I was sitting chatting for awhile with dh's cousin about this and that. We got to talking about school and I mentioned how I had to do a "lesson" for one of my classes. I am a nutrition major, but the class is a Cooperative Education class, so it's basically about teaching vocational school and for education majors in family and consumer sciences. So anyway, I was telling her I was thinking of doing my lesson on the myths of breastfeeding. She looks at me all shocked and says "I hope there's no men in your class!"

I just don't get what the big deal is. Are college age men not able to handle hearing the word breast without snickering or something? I think it is just as important for men to be knowledgeable about bf, because more than likely they will have children someday, and their gf's or wives will need their support if they decide to bf. Are we only supposed to talk about bf with other women? Is it some kind of taboo or something. I've certainly never had a problem speaking about bf in mixed company. I think her comment must go back to the sexualization of the female breast and how bf has become something that is supposed to be hidden in society and done only in private. Whatever. I don't now if there will be men in the class or not as it's an internet class and this is the only on campus meeting. I really doubt it, as there aren't many male fcs majors but to be honest I'm really not all that concerned.
post #2 of 19
Just a guess, but your friend has no kids, right? She probably is embarrassed about men being around if someone is talking about what HER breasts are designed for. Please teach the class, I think it's a great idea.
post #3 of 19
Well, I for one, DO hope there are men in your class...and women...anybody really, who will be positively influenced by your lesson.

Yeah, it's kind of weird. Like she thinks bf'ing is some big secret that men aren't allowed to know about.

Shhhhh! Don't tell!
post #4 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaunam
Well, I for one, DO hope there are men in your class...and women...anybody really, who will be positively influenced by your lesson.
post #5 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaunam
Well, I for one, DO hope there are men in your class...and women...anybody really, who will be positively influenced by your lesson.
I completely agree! And it definitely sounds like she needs the lesson, time to learn that breasts are for more than selling beer.
post #6 of 19
IME, the men are usually less 'bothered' (for lack of a better word) about issues involving breastfeeding.
post #7 of 19
My COM class has two women, me and the other one. I'm considering doing my persuasive speech on breastfeeding. We might have to do it on something related to technology so I might do it on SNS vs bottles.

So yeah, your dh's cousin is a bit silly.
post #8 of 19
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone. I was just a little baffled by that comment. Not quite the response I was expected.

So, my lesson only has to be 15 minutes long so what I was thinking of doing was typing some common breastfeeding myths and putting them in a jar. Then I'll pass the jar around and let members of the class read them aloud and then I will talk about them. At this point in my education I know more about bf than I do about nutrition and I'm not very comfortable speaking in front of people, so I thought I'd stick with something I'm fairly knowledgeable about. Plus, hopefully I can dispel a few myths that some of the members of the class might actually believe.
post #9 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by shelbean91
IME, the men are usually less 'bothered' (for lack of a better word) about issues involving breastfeeding.

So TRUE!!

I believe it is because most women have GUILT and SHAME, even if it is subconcious/buried/hidden very deeply, about not having breastfed their own children (or having given up/weaned at 3 mos/are not planning to even try, etc)!!!!!

They KNOW what they did/are doing/plan to do is WRONG!!!
post #10 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobandjess99
So TRUE!!

I believe it is because most women have GUILT and SHAME, even if it is subconcious/buried/hidden very deeply, about not having breastfed their own children (or having given up/weaned at 3 mos/are not planning to even try, etc)!!!!!

They KNOW what they did/are doing/plan to do is WRONG!!!
I don't know if it's about guilt or shame, but I do think it has to do with breasts being used for their given purpose instead of playthings. I also think it has to do with the tendency for women to be so competitive with each other. I.E., if I say I do something differently from you- you may see it as an attack on what you're doing, not just an observation of a difference, kwim?

And, it doesn't happen all the time, but it does happen frequently, IME. It even happens here at MDC.
post #11 of 19
I hope men are in your class. I cannot tell you how many women I have known who have weaned early or never bf because their DHs did not want them to breastfeed based on some myth or misconception.
post #12 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by merrick
Thanks everyone. I was just a little baffled by that comment. Not quite the response I was expected.

So, my lesson only has to be 15 minutes long so what I was thinking of doing was typing some common breastfeeding myths and putting them in a jar. Then I'll pass the jar around and let members of the class read them aloud and then I will talk about them. At this point in my education I know more about bf than I do about nutrition and I'm not very comfortable speaking in front of people, so I thought I'd stick with something I'm fairly knowledgeable about. Plus, hopefully I can dispel a few myths that some of the members of the class might actually believe.

good idea, and hope your presentation goes well
post #13 of 19
Sounds like an interesting presentation. I hope it goes well, and I hope that you do have a mixed group. Men need to be supportive of breastfeeding if we're ever going to achieve it being the true norm for baby feeding.
post #14 of 19
God forbid men get a lesson on what breasts really are for
post #15 of 19
Great idea, I would love to hear how it goes!
post #16 of 19
How old is your dh's cousin? It sounds like something an embarrassed teenager would say.
I remember how embarassed I was as a teen about all my bodily functions, but I got over it!
post #17 of 19
My sister wrote a paper/presentation about breastfeeding in her debat class... it was so much fun to help her with it!!! She was a first year college student and didn't think it was weird at all, it turned out to be a great presentation be side the fact that no one could show the "benifit" or 'advantage" of formula so she got a A+ for it!
post #18 of 19
Thread Starter 
She is a year younger than me, so 23.
post #19 of 19
Quote:
Originally Posted by merrick
She is a year younger than me, so 23.
Hmmmmm. Yes, she should be more mature about these things, but if she's like most young people in our culture, she wasn't exposed to bf while she was growing up, so it's a shock to her to see it. You are being a wonderful role model to her by modeling bf and AP. Maybe when she gets pregnant for the first time (I'm assuming she doesn't have any kids), she'll come to you for bf advice.

I'll never forget the first time I saw a woman bf her baby. It was 1970, and I was 15 years old and living in small-town Iowa. We went to a shopping mall in a larger town; it was probably August and we were shopping for school clothes for the coming year. I went into the bathroom in Sears, and sitting on a couch was a woman bf. I was shocked to the core; I had NEVER seen this before!
It didn't help that she had practically undressed herself to bf; she was practically stripped to the waist. Of course, the clothing from the late 60's and early 70's wasn't exactly bf friendly; most dresses were one-pieces which zipped in the back.
Still, I'm glad that I saw her. Nine years later, I was bf my own baby!
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