November 28-December 4 updates - Page 3

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by jenny-g

Allright. I'm going to stop replying to this when I see it, soon, because it is making me crazy. WHY on EARTH would anyone congratulate ANYONE for losing weight during this stage of pregancy?! It is BAD! She should see her doc/midwife and find out the reason! It is not healthy to lose weight in pregnancy, and I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that people on here would actually congratulate her on that. It's like.. oh, you have gestational diabetes! CONGRATS! I hope I get it too!

Are people so warped from our weight-crazy society that they can't understand what healthy weight gain is in pregancy?! Do you know you're making people who gain *normal* amounts of weight feel bad? We have threads on here titled "oh no too much weight" from people who are gaining exactly the average, normal amount of weight.

Okay, you obviously don't know me or anything about me, so I'm going to explain a few things:

1. I'm a fat person. (No, I'm not one of those people who has 5 or 10 extra pounds, not even 20-- I'm an honest to goodness FAT person, with a BMI in the bona-fide, "morbidly obese" range.) It is very common for fat people to lose weight during pregnancy, particularly in the first trimester but it's not uncommon for weight loss to continue throughout the second and even the third trimesters. There are many contributing factors: "morning" sickness, pressure on the stomach as the baby grows causing diminished appetite, hormones slowing the digestive system down, increased metabolism, and the fact that many women eat a much healthier diet when they're pregnant than they would otherwise are just a few. It's not "bad," nor is it an attempt (on my part or anyone else's) to make people with a more traditional weight-gain-in-pregnancy pattern feel badly about it.

2. Why would I see my doctor to find out the reason? This is my *third* pregnancy, and while this isn't my usual pattern (I usually start gaining weight when I start having a somewhat normal appetite again) it's still common enough and easy enough for me to understand that I see no reason to make extra doctor's appointments just to discuss it.

3. If I had started this pregnancy at an average weight or underweight, I would probably feel differently about losing weight than I do. I mean, a woman who gets pregnant weighing 110 pounds would definately have something to be concerned about if she dropped 30, but that is so not me; even today, at my lowest weight since I was pregnant with my son, I could stand to lose about 80 pounds. My baby is growing well, as have my two previous children during pregnancy. I've got no reason to suspect that there's anything wrong, size-wise, with my baby. I am definately not diabetic (gestational or otherwise); I'm very familiar with the signs and symptoms of diabetes, as my husband is a type I diabetic and my mother is a type II diabetic. I've even checked my blood sugar a few times, when I felt uncomfortable and wanted to be sure that wasn't the reason; I'm not cool with my baby feeding on ketones and fat while he's growing inside me.

In other words, I know what's going on. It's a little strange for me, and a teensy bit uncomfortable because my clothing doesn't fit me and that sucks, but quite frankly if I had the cash for new clothing I'd be tickled pink. God knows I've got plenty of a$$ to lose, and if pregnancy hormones can do that for me, more power to them!

[PheobNFam]

Renee -- Thanks for the tip. I'll ask my MW about the placenta thing. The thought had crossed my mind, but I just assumed that I would bleed if it were the case. Good to know it's still a possibility. I'll ask, though the pain is easing a bit today. I think it was a really good thing to be able to lay down all night.

Eilonwy -- I say, if you're eating well, and that li'l babe is growing at a good rate, then your losing weight is just going to help you have a healthier pregnancy. Obviously you weigh in at each doctor's appointment anyhow. So, your doc is obviously aware. Just listen to what he/she has to say, and you will be just dandy.

I need to take another belly picture today. This thing is getting BIG. - And beautiful. I am pleased with the pregnant look. Aside from the pains I'm feeling, I am very happy with this pregnant body of mine.

[Stayathomemommy]

burk-a-bee in my opinion you dont have to worry about baby being head up because they can turn right before pushing. so you can go through labor with baby head up and the hospital and everyone freaking out for not reason. usually if baby is in bad possition you can start doing excersizes in the last month to get her head down.

and i cant remember who asked but i said no to an induction at 2 weeks over due. i asked them what i could do to help THEM feel better about letting me be. They wanted an ultrasound. so i gave them that. the U/s showed that there was plenty of fluid and the placenta was perfectly healthy. a few days later i had my baby on my own. but they say that second, third and beyhond you usually dont come as late. we will see.

my update is...........well, i'm 21w and like a turkey timer i just popped OUT! my husband was away for three days around thanksgiving and when he saw me had said wow you are really pregnant now. I am in 100% maternity clothes. saw my friends today after a week and they couldnt believe how preggo i looked. its amazing how you go from complaining about not having anything to wear because maternity doesnt fit yet to the next day only being able to wear maternity!!
Baby Boy is kicking like crazy and others can feel him so thats lots of fun. i hardly have time to think of him or that fact that i am pregnant because i have had a sick 2 yr old for a whole week! so all that great energy and nesting i was doing is gone. i am pooped out and my house is a disaster. oh well it was good while it lasted. hopefully we will all get healthy and i can get my house back to normal. we are having christmas here with both sets of grandparents and i havent done a thing to prepare. oh well.

[2+twins]

Originally Posted by jenny-g

Allright. I'm going to stop replying to this when I see it, soon, because it is making me crazy. WHY on EARTH would anyone congratulate ANYONE for losing weight during this stage of pregancy?! It is BAD! She should see her doc/midwife and find out the reason! It is not healthy to lose weight in pregnancy, and I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that people on here would actually congratulate her on that. It's like.. oh, you have gestational diabetes! CONGRATS! I hope I get it too!

Are people so warped from our weight-crazy society that they can't understand what healthy weight gain is in pregancy?! Do you know you're making people who gain *normal* amounts of weight feel bad? We have threads on here titled "oh no too much weight" from people who are gaining exactly the average, normal amount of weight.

I'd expect this in, like, COSMO, but not here. I ferverently wish that the people on here losing weight are healthy, that their babies are healthy, and that they find out the reasons for what is happening and fix them (i.e. bad diabetes- you lose weight!!). Let's treat it like the serious issue it is.

Alright, I'll try to get off my soapbox now. I'm just still so shocked to see this here.

Oh bleh. She said that she's eating now and *expected* to be gaining weight like she had in her previous pregnancies by this time but she just hasn't. I guess I don't see what the big deal is. It's not like she's starving herself or is unable to eat. Sounds like (if I understood correctly) that she's doing just fine and her body just hasn't quite caught up to the weight gain part (her body will when it's ready and needs to). She also has stated many times that she began this pregnancy overweight and it's very common for someone who's starting above like this to loose a lot. So good for her for getting the luxury of being down a few pounds at this point (except for the clothing issue, of course). It doesn't sound as though she's doing anything unhealthy. And for the record, I'm all for positive weight gain in pregnancy - I couldn't care less how much a person (including myself) gains as long as it's based on a healthy diet. I don't think anyone is cheering her on to be unhealthy like you might find in Cosmo.

ETA: Didn't see your reply elionwy - sorry! Looks like you've covered it.

[burke-a-bee]

Stayathomemommy thanks!

[AdinaL]

Rynna - if you were a sz 2 when you got pregnant, I would be worried. I think you are fine. And you know what - it may make you healthier in the long run. Sounds like you are eating just fine- and as long as that is the case, sometimes, your body knows best.

Jenny-G - you seem awfully reactionary to a lot of things on this board right now. I don't know if it is because you are stressed out (which is completely logical and normal), or if you really feel like everyone here is misinformed and somehow doing bad things that will cause harm to our babies. I notice that you are fairly new member here, so you may not know that most of the women here think outside the mainstream medical rhetoric, or that we are pretty keen on doing our own research and making up our own minds. In addition, your posts have been kind of harsh, and bordering on rude. If you are truly concerned that we are doing harm to ourselves or our babies, I can understand that things may come out a little sharper than neccesary. Just try to be gentle please, and respectful of everyone, even if something seems like it is odd, or in your view, wrong. We have a lot of smart gals on this board, and some pretty awesome ones as well.

[AllisonK]

Eilonwy,
This is my third pg too and I have also been losing weight. I lost a total of 30 lbs with my 2nd pg and betw/ 5mos and birth had gained 30 lbs. I was NOT throwing up all the time either, only in the AM and rarely food just water. This time I lost about 30 lbs again and only a tiny bit sick in the AM but able to eat. I am not at all worried about it and neither is my MW. And my OB was not worried about it last time either. Some of us just do this! I don't consider myself overweight but I am not skinny, I am 5 foot 9 and I weight about 170-180 (pre prego).

Congrats to all on the U/s and the girls!

FreeSpiritmama: Placentas can move! Don't rule anything out until it is time for that. See what your MW says and go from there. Sending out placenta vibes!!!

I have never heard of balling as a dirty term. And I am no prude. Will have to watch my spellings!!!

Allison

[hairpin]

I AM... Exhausted. A site visit, a meeting with architects, and my midwife visit all yesterday just sucked all the energy out of me. I have deadlines up the wazoo at work. Add to that we're doing a bathroom remodel. We have one bathroom in the house, so there is currently no shower but there is a meager toilet sitting on plywood. So every night I go over to my mother-in-law's house and use her shower. Which is great. But I'm really tired of having to do this every night. It just started raining a lot recently in San Francisco, with an atypical cold front. So I've also started sneezing. Oh, add to that, I couldn't figure out how to put my contacts in this morning. Yes, I am a mess. I'm being bitchy to everyone. Thank God tomorrow is Friday.

Oh hey nighten. The lights sound like my house... Just kidding. I don't have any outside lights. I'm not really even decorating for Christmas that much. We're not going to have a tree, since we're doing remodeling. But I do have a wreath on the door. I'm buying a nativity set. And I have a pretty nice lighted star I put in the window. Now the lighted star made out of capis shell is a filipino tradition. My husband brought it for me from the PI - Philippine Islands. It's all different colors and pretty.... but the first time I plugged it. WOW!!! It started disco flashing all over the place. It's really shocking if you've never seen it. It's like your own little version of Las Vegas at home, except the patterns keep changing. First time I saw it, I thought it was saying to me, "Holy Cra*, it's $(*@&$*&@($*&@ CHRISTMAS!!!!! Get up and dance!" Haha. Now I'm used to it. But I'm sure some of my neighbors hate it.

They look like ones on this page if anyone wants to peek.
parol
Although mine flashes a LOT faster. And then calms down and does a slow burn out. It's crazy!

Oh yeah, my midwife appointment yesterday was awesome. I really liked her.

[AdinaL]

Originally Posted by AllisonK

I have never heard of balling as a dirty term. And I am no prude. Will have to watch my spellings!!!

HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! That is why I always chuckle - because it sounds SOOOOO out of context!



HALFWAY!!!!

[Daphnes_mama]

Weight gain/loss

I am not gaining much weight, either! I wouldn't say I have lost weight by any means. I have gained 10 pounds total this pregnancy, and I am 19 weeks. I am certainly not dieting by any stretch of the imagination, and I am not exercising like I should. I know my weight gain up to this point is totally normal, but I would have expected a lot more weight gain by now. Last time, I gained about 20 pounds by this point. WEIRD, but nothing to be concerned with as I am obviously growing a baby and wearing nothing but maternity clothes.

[AdinaL]

And because I am on a posting spree today...
http://knitspiral.typepad.com/northfranz/

Pics of the baby girl!

[eilonwy]

Adina-- I'd be worried if I was a sz 2, too! I actually was that small in high school, quite briefly (as an interesting aside, despite the fact that I was just shy of 5' tall, I weighed fully 135 at that size), and I didn't like the way that I looked. My knees were bigger than my thighs, which is where I draw the line between "slender" and "too freaking skinny." That didn't change my eating habits (I was dealing with bulimia and anorexia at the time), it just made me feel uncomfortable when I saw my body in a mirror or in pictures. Strange dichotomy to many, but...

I also snicker every time I see "balled" in place of "bawled." I'm glad I'm not the only one with my mind in the gutter! Especially since "balled" usually refers to a specific sort of sex, one which I would not expect to see discussed in any degree of detail on MDC... : Where's that snarfing smilie when you need it?!

[AdinaL]

See at your height - 5' i could see being a sz 2. Did you know they make tall jeans in a sz 2 -in other words jeans that would fit my 5'8" tall self, if I was essentially Jack Skellington from Nightmare Before Christmas. Scary that their might be someone who buys that size jean....

My dirty mind has gotten worse since I have been pregnant.

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by AdinaL

See at your height - 5' i could see being a sz 2. Did you know they make tall jeans in a sz 2 -in other words jeans that would fit my 5'8" tall self, if I was essentially Jack Skellington from Nightmare Before Christmas. Scary that their might be someone who buys that size jean....

See, I actually knew someone who wore a 2T (tall, not toddler ); she was 5'5", but with looooong legs. She was also boneless and fluffy; she didn't look too skinny at all in a size 2. Whereas I most assuredly did. Right now I'm about a 14, as I said, and right now I'm just about 5'1" but most people looking at me would be absolutely shocked to learn that I weigh more than 200 pounds (closer to 210 these days ). It's all about build. I am built like a brick house; gigantic bones, lots and lots of muscle with a healthy overlay of fat spread evenly over all of my body. I'm one of those people who "carries weight well." I know another woman who, at 5'4" and 155 is also in a size 14. Unlike me, however, she looks *fat*. She's got teensy weensy bird bones, and a much less muscular build than I have; her weight is all fluff! This woman looks healthy in a size 3, while I start to look like I'm sick if I'm smaller than an 8. Seriously-- I got into a size 6 and instead of saying, "wow, you look great!" people would try to ascertain what kind of cancer I had.

[mirandahope]

I'm doing pretty well. Hooked on artichokes and brussel sprouts! I had a pretty good visit with my in laws from Saturday til Wednesday. I am getting to know them better now, and since they are the most stable and supportive of my parental units, that is very helpful and wonderful for me. MIL said she noticed that I am more relaxed and tolerant of foods than the last time I was there ( a month ago or so). I feel more trusting of the pregnancy now that we have seen that baby is fine.

The midwife called on Monday to clarify the results of the ultrasound. The tech had said that the placenta was low. The midwife clarified and said that actually, the placenta has 2 lobes to it: most of it is on the anterior and some, a second lobe, is on the posterior. I asked her lots of questions, because after spending the last pregnancy freaking out about everything, I know if I don't ask questions, I will freak out! She answered them well, and is not worried about the placenta. She said that she has seen this before, and the only reason they want me to have another ultrasound is so that at delivery, they know that we have all the parts out before I go home.

And the baby is fine! Perfect size for 20 weeks, and all the parts are there and working. (not sure if I mentioned this before, sorry if i'm repeating)

I still feel kind of anticlimactic, but also like I can relax. On Friday, I went to Babys R Us on my way home from my counsellor and bought some baby clothes and cloths and a hooded towel. Before, I'd said I wanted to meet the kid face to live face first, but I am feeling innocently hopeful again (yippee!! I didn't think that could happen!) of course it is not total, but I am glad it is there at all! So I let this hope carry me to preparing for a live baby. i told my MIL that and she said, "Oh, does that mean the rest of us have permission now too?" I found that so lovely and supportive. "Yes" I told her.

I'm looking forward to Christmas, and going back to stay with ILS again. I am more willing to expect that I will be able to do it now (before I was expecting bedrest any minute, because from week 10-week 19.5 that's waht I had to do last time). Now I take each day as it comes, and hope and expect a live baby. If I am wrong, then at least I had hope once this time.

I've gained quite a bit of weight I think,about 30 lbs or more. I decided not to weigh myself at the last midwife appt because I just didn't want to know and worry about it. I have to eat every 2 hours or more often to prevent myself from throwing up, and I am not going to stop doing that just so I look thinner. I am a little nervous about my size and refuse to listen to people who ask me or DH if I am further along than 5 months, because it does touch a nerve. Some wise mothers who are acquaintances/friends have said that we gain as much as we are going to gain in pregnancy, and each of us is different. I can't compare myself to anyone else, and so I try to love myself as I am.

[mirandahope]

nipple stimulation for breastfeeding prep?

I feel somewhat shy about this, but want to put it out there. My step-mom, just about every time I talk to her, tells me I need to start stimulating my nipples so that I can better breastfeed my baby due in April. I know nothing about this, and thought I read somewhere that too much stimulation can cause early labour. Anyone know something about this? I will ask the midwife next appointment but wonder what your thoughts are?

[Stayathomemommy]

this early in the game i doubt anything like nipple stimulation could make that baby start coming!!!! if it were only that easy! i did do some nipple prep with my first but i remember feeling slightly weird since i had never breastfed. have your hubby maybe spend a little longer in that area during foreplay?? i dont know, i am already not wanting anyone to come near my breasts. they are tender and when the kids brush against them or my husband makes "the move" in that direction i dont like it at all. when you are closer to your due date. like last couple of weeks is a great time to prepare by massaging, pulling a little, that sort of thing. Doing it in the shower made it less weird for me. maybe start with lanolin and apply it at the end of your pregnancy to get them ready too?? but i dont think anything can really prepare you for nursing 24/7! I am sure others have an opinion.

[2+twins]

I'm a CBE and prepping your nipples for bf'ing is something I'm not at all familiar with (although I've heard people say things like you should go bra-less so your nipples will get roughed up). Having gone through breastfeeding twice now I can say that I honestly doubt there's any amount of nipple prep that's going to make much of a difference when you're trying to learn how to do it and the baby doesn't know either. My advice - be adamant about getting baby latched correctly from the get-go. This has been hard for me personally b/c the baby would cry, latch (incorrectly, but at least be latched), and I'd let it go at that. I was just so relieved to have the baby latched on that I'd overlook the fact that the positioning wasn't correct. And boy did I ever pay for that! Lanolin worked wonders on healing my raw, cracked & bleeding nipples. A good latch should help you avoid that, but that may mean that you have to constantly break a poor latch and start over, which will be frustrating for both you & your baby.

p.s. Lanolin is AMAZING on diaper rash too - I'll never use anything else again (my girls have particularly sensitive bums).

[AllisonK]

Originally Posted by eilonwy

I also snicker every time I see "balled" in place of "bawled." I'm glad I'm not the only one with my mind in the gutter! Especially since "balled" usually refers to a specific sort of sex, one which I would not expect to see discussed in any degree of detail on MDC... : Where's that snarfing smilie when you need it?!

Please someone enlighten me. If it is that bad PM me. I cannot even begin to guess what this means.
Allison

[ZenMamaJen]

I talked to a couple of LC's and friends and they said there was really nothing to do to prepare your nipples for nursing.
I wish there were! I need all the help I can get! I had a horrible time with dd, she was a great nurser, but I made tons of mistakes. Hoping it goes much easier this time.