Silly family bed question

[Annais]

Howdy!

I am 9 1/2 weeks pregnant, and already thinking about what I need, don't need when baby gets here! We are planning on doing the family bed, I'm already looking forward to it.

So, here is my question: will we need to buy a crib? I think we probably won't, but others are telling me differently. I thought I'd go to the source, experienced family bed mamas!
Any input would be greatly appreciated!
TIA

[momto l&a]

Cribs are an abosolute necessity, for storing clean laundry

[hahamommy]

:LOL I totally agree with Erin! I would *NOT* invest your hard-earned money into a crib, but if someone offers you one and you just can't turn it down, use it for laundry, toy storage... anything but your babe

~diana ild

[Super Pickle]

Cribs are not a necessity.
We got the same thing from all sides: "But you have to have a crib!"
And when we didn't have one when ds was 6 months old, MIL bought us one.
DS has never slept in it; we do use it for occasional time-out's. Otherwise, it just clutters up the room.
Don't spend your own money on a crib if you know you're doing the family bed.

[merpk]

... by momto l&a
Cribs are an absolute necessity, for storing clean laundry

:LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL :LOL

The rest of the world can't get past the idea that babies belong behind bars. I just don't get it.

Ignore the crib.

My suggestion would be to put your mattresses on the floor (we have wall2wall futons in our bedroom, 5inthebed) so you don't have to worry so much about falling out of the bed, either. (Though young babies should not be put near the edge, they can fall off, and even the 4inch drop off a futon would be dangerous ...)

The folks who are pushing cribs are sure to tell you that you absolutely must schedule your feedings and feed soandso many ounces : etc., etc. ... and since breasts don't come with liquid measurement indications ... : :LOL :LOL :LOL

Sorry. The family bed is something that makes me get all dewey-eyed & verbose all at the same time.

Good luck ...

- Amy

[Annais]

Thanks guys!

That is such a relief!

We'll just spend the money on cloth diapers, a much better investment

[happykat]

We family bed most of the time. Other times dh sleeps in the spare room while ds and I have the "family bed".

But we do have a crib. And although ds has never slept in it (he is 6 months old), I like that we have one - and ds is in it for a few minutes most days.

We have 2 dogs and 2 cats - the crib is a hair-free/pet-free zone for ds. I can put him there while hauling diaper pails to the basement or if I have to clean muddy paws and know that he is safe from accidental trampling.

The other day - one of the cats vomited and the dogs were heading over to eat it (gross huh? - no wonder washing diapers seems like nothing <grin>). So ds was put in crib with mobile & toys while I scooped up vomit and cleaned carpet.

I don't think everyone *needs* a crib - but if someone offers to loan you one...think about trying it out for a while. You may find that you use it after all - just not in the way it was intended.

And it makes a good toybox!

happykat

[guest^]

We never had a crib.

We've always slept on a futon about 5 inches off the floor...

We were given a crib mattress, and for awhile,had the futon on the floor with crib mattress next to it...

And now,the crib mattress is on a toddler bed,pushed against our raised futon...

I suppose there were times when I wished we had a crib for napping.,..like when kids were7-12mos old and could(and were) crawling right off futon at naps...

My good friend uses one for naps and for a safe place to put her dd when peeing,showering,etc...

mamapoppins

[taepae]

I am a new mother and find the family bed great. My Aunt found a small playpen at the dump or yard sale and it is convenient for holding clothes and the occasional babe. It is small enough to fold away.

[Teresa]

Put the crib $ towards a nice King size bed and baby-safe bedding instead.

Teresa

[Czen:)]

Differing opinion here! Hope thats OK. We family bed here and love it. But once DD could roll/crawl I started putting her in the crib to nap and for the first part of the night. She is worn to sleep in a sling, laid down asleep in her crib, and picked up as soon as she calls out. If its night time she then joins us in our bed for the rest of the night. Personally, with the bedrooms on another floor from the laundry. etc. I feel much more confident getting chores done while she's sleeping in a safe contained space.
I think the family bed and a crib can co-exist nicely and even make life a little bit easier! However, I'm pretty sure this isn't to popular of a view to have here.

[Annais]

Thanks!
It's great to hear everyone's opinions!

[4inNH]

Hi:

If someone wants to buy you a crib you could suggest the co-family sleeping portacrib. I believe RightStart or One Step Ahead has it. The side attaches to your bed so it's sort of like sleeping together.

Since our bed is only full size, we used the crib my MIL gave us by taking off one side and putting it up against our bed.

We're shopping for a king size now as we have two children and the full is really cozy!

Michelle

[pioneermama]

we bought a crib and it wasn't even used once! We finally gave it to a family who wanted it. Buying a guard rail for the family bed might be a good idea though.

[Jennifer Z]

I wouldn't buy a crib. We thought we needed it and all it does is take up space. ds just turned 1 and we finally just took it apart so we had the space instead.

What I would suggest is the Graco pack and play with a changing table. We have one in our living room and it can be used to corral him if neccessary (almost never happens) and for toy, diaper & clothes storage. It also has a bassinet attachment for when babe is little (we used this for naps when he was bitty to keep him away from the cats). Use the changing table all the time.

I am not comfortable putting him on the bed alone, so we just put him to sleep on a blanket with the boppy underneath it (creates a "lap like" feeling)...I lay next to him and nurse him to sleep and he sacks out in the living room. Because we never put him in a "quiet place" to sleep he can now sleep through anything...vaccumm, dishes, people talking. Now that he is a bit older, he will sometimes snuggle onto the blanket and go to sleep on his own when he gets tired. (proof that you don't need to "train" your child to self comfort, they will do it on their own when they are ready for it) This had the added advantage of being easy to transport when we spent Christmas with in-laws.

[Britishmum]

We bought one for dd#1 and she never used it. With a second child it can be useful - as a safe place for the babe away from a toddler. But not the way others use a crib for long periods

Dd#2 actually likes it and sometimes spends the first part of the night in it before we go up to bed. Dd #1 loved the swing when colicky. Babies are all different - I'd wait and see what works for yours before spending $$$s on any equipment.

[Cakes]

We never actually bought a crib. People gave us one with our first and she rarely slept in it. I knew very little about co sleeping at that point but did not want my little one so far away. Our second endevour ended up as twins and they have never slept in our borrowed cribs. We have a king and queen bed side by side and everyone sleeps together.

[Solange]

ditto to all who have come before me....
No crib....
We had one b/c like you we were *told* that we *needed* it...but it just became a cage for ds's stuffed animals and a good show to the inlaws when they came that he actually may be sleeping in it and not with us...lol....I finally took it down at around 3 months old when I just got tired of trying to cover up the fact that we were not your mainstream parent types to our extended family members.
Congrats good luck and welcome..

[lucina3]

We won't be buying a crib. They aren't necessary, except, as someone said, they make great storage areas. :LOL

Dh and I are TTC our first baby together (my 4th) and when Dh said "What kind of crib should we get?" Our 4 yo looked at him very seriously and said "Daddy, we don't put babies in cages in this house!"

[lovnmama]

When we were expecteing our 1st child, dh and I went out and bought a crib, because we didn't know where baby would sleep. We recieved beautiful bedding with cordinating curtains as gifts. The room looked like something out of a catalog.
Once baby arrived, ds wanted nothing to do with the crib. Co-sleeping was the only way for us. We were closet co-sleepers.
We finally took the crib down when ds figured out how to climb up it, at 15 months. We never even put it back up when our 2nd arrived.
I agree that cribs serve as great storage bins for clean clothes. They keep the in-laws from asking too many nosey questions, which can be nice for new parents.
Best wishes for you and baby!