"You won't be getting any medals for natural childbirth" - Page 2

[Jasmyn's Mum]

MY MEDAL FOR A DRUG-FREE BIRTH:

-Jazzy came out wide eyed, alert and fully consious of her surroundings

-I got to feel all those yummy endorphins after the birth

-dd nursed within 2 minutes of being born and latched on like a champion

-I could get up and walk after I birthed her holding her in my arms

-I get to tell her all about those things when she's older

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

I have heard that many times. My mother for one has said something to that affect. For me the award came in the feeling of dd's warm body as it touched my inner thigh. Knowing that she was born without all kinds of stuff in her body. The feeling of my ds's head crowning of knowing at that moment I was doing what I was made to do. That is my reward.

The feeling as I look back on both my natural unmedicated births is that at those moments in time it felt as tho I was the most powerfull woman on the earth. To me labor and birth all comes together to make the whole experiance. I didnt want to miss a second of it not the pain of it not the joy of it.

I am always afraid to say how it made me feel to other woman for fear of offending some one who had meds and/or epi. I hope I have not done so here.

[B52Bombshell]

Originally Posted by DreamsInDigital

...
So yeah, you don't get a medal. You get WAY more than that.

I *did* want to show how tough I was! (providing all went well, of course - and it did) I got an *immense* ego boost, which, frankly, I needed (I had *low* self esteem for years). There were times afterwards that I thought I couldn't do something requiring a lot of physical strength or endurance (like weight lifting or exercise, or just something even psychologically difficult). I had to stop & think "Wait a minute...girlfriend - you went thru natural childbirth! After that, everything else is a piece of cake!"

I, too, am terrified of anything going into my spine unnecessarily. Not of the needle...of the fact that someone's mucking around in your SPINAL column. shudder.

[celestialdreamer]

Originally Posted by DreamsInDigital

I just gave birth less than 48 hours ago and what I feel is 10,000 times better than any award, medal or certificate. I feel fantastic and amazing and totally in awe of myself, my strength, my body and knowing that women all around the world do this every day makes me feel like I belong to this amazing thing.
So yeah, you don't get a medal. You get WAY more than that.

Wow! Congrats mama!!! Welcome to your little one!

[Tofu the Geek]

Originally Posted by ~lioneyes~

As for the baby shows, I saw the one this afternoon where the woman said she knew she wanted an epi since she concieved. Then she was in the hospital, and they took her in for a c-sec because she wasn't progressing. She was at 6cm, and the dr. gave her two hours. I mean, Two Hours?! Give the woman a chance! They said the baby was fine, just wasn't progressing. Oy!

Wow, unbelievable! I waited until about 8.5cm to go the hospital and once I arrived the entire hospital atmosphere slowed my labour down drastically (heck I took a 45 min nap at 9cm!). At 8.5cm when I arrived, it took me another 7.25 hours before I started to push, 8 hours total before DD was born. Sadly it would seem that doctor has no idea what happens in labour.

[AngelBee]

My metal...

Healthy wide awake baby

Latched on great right away

I had a surreal minute when the baby was laid on my chest.....I did it : It was like time had stopped....kinda like after an orgasim..

I wanted to start dancing.....started walking around almost right away. :

I got to push when I said I was going to push (ds1 and dd were very medical )

I got to freak my mainstream friends out with my mad strength. : I kinda like the shock value

I learned to trust my body and celebrate how beautifully it was created :

I don't think I have ever felt closer to God....I know he was my doula

I actually had a ton of fun during the pushing stage....I was cracking jokes.....it was great :

I am tearing up just writing this......it was so beautiful.... :

[grace's voice]

Originally Posted by B52Bombshell

I *did* want to show how tough I was! (providing all went well, of course - and it did) I got an *immense* ego boost, which, frankly, I needed (I had *low* self esteem for years). There were times afterwards that I thought I couldn't do something requiring a lot of physical strength or endurance (like weight lifting or exercise, or just something even psychologically difficult). I had to stop & think "Wait a minute...girlfriend - you went thru natural childbirth! After that, everything else is a piece of cake!"

I, too, am terrified of anything going into my spine unnecessarily. Not of the needle...of the fact that someone's mucking around in your SPINAL column. shudder.

I was the same way, super low self-esteem. Even the thought of team sports sent me to tears. I felt weak, inferior, and inadequate. The fact that my mom told me repeatedly throughout my life that I could never handle childbirth, even WITH drugs, was a HUGE motivator! I AM a giant wimp, and my mom does have a very high pain tolerance. Yet, she has extrememly negitive memories of birth, and the most negitive is her one (unplanned) natural birth, whereas I have only good things to say about my (planned) natural birth. Planning, education, and motivation make all the difference. But I really think the #1 thing that determines how labor and birth go is a positive attitude!

[zonapellucida]

Originally Posted by nepenthesea

The baby shows are sort of like a train wreck! I have to watch, but I still complain about them.

I cannot stomach these programs any more. After my first homebirth I now scream at the tv while watching--raises my stress so I would have to agree with the above statement

[Pariah]

there was a mom trying for a natural birth but not coping well with the pain (mind you, EVERY shot of her she was flat on her back

Oh my god, I cannot imagine labor on my back. It's not at all comfortable in the slightest to lay on my back now, and I've got 9 more weeks to go! It seems like it would be excrutiating to have to lay on my back the whole time through labor. I've been all about my exercise ball and squatting, even now just for exercise/stretching when my back and hips feel sore...feels a million times better then laying down.

People always sound shocked when I mention a HB and no drugs. They think I did it because I'm so brave or something. YEAH RIGHT! I did it because I'm a giant chicken who knows what happens at the hospital and NO WAY am I going there unless it's life or death! Besides, I'm so scared of needles I'd take labor pain over a needle in my spine (~shudders~)

I feel the same way, exactly! Doctors and epis scare me far more then labor pains. I handle stress/pain much better in the comfort of my home, with few people around, going inside myself and dealing with it there. There is no way I could relax in a hospital.

[sapphire_chan]

People still watch "A Baby Story"? Doesn't high blood pressure put women in the high-risk category? I'd think that show'd be counterindicated during pregnancy.

[2+twins]

Originally Posted by hairpin

We don't get medals for raising healthy, well-adjusted families, but that's what we want to do regardless, right?

You'd think! I think people make statements like this (the medal thing - not your statement) out of defensiveness for their own decisions. Why else would anyone say such a thing, b/c what YOU said here is absolutely right - why wouldn't someone want to do their best in life with what they had?

[Moon Faerie]

I hate that show. My dh had actually banned me from watching it when he was home while I was pregnant with dd. It came on during ds's nap time, and I'd starttelling off the tv and the Drs. Now if I turn it on, he does the same thing too.

Oh, and my dh knew how much I hated people telling me I wouldn't get a medal. About a week after dd was born, I get a strange package in the mail. (Way to small to be a diaper. ) Yup, it was my medal that my dh ordered for me. It's hanging above our dresser now.

[grace's voice]

I do the same thing when watching A Baby Story... I sound like a man watching sports! Yet, I'm freakishly drawn to it. Good thing we don't get TLC! Its just so sad to see all those woman who could have wonderful births, had they just taken the initiative to educate themselves.

I used to love the show before I knew better.

[Teensy]

to show how bad we are.

yeah, but that is a nice side benefit though!

I had a med-free birth with my first (& #2 & #3), primarily, of course, for the no-drugs-for-baby and lessen-risk-of-complications reasons. But a part of what helped me in my determination was to prove to someone who told me I couldn't possibly do it without drugs that indeed I could.

DH didn't give me a medal or certificate, but he does enjoy telling people that I didn't get any drugs in labor, that's for sure!

[trmpetplaya]

The day after my unmedicated home water birth (which was the most amazing experience I've ever had!) I had to go to the hospital for a kidney infection (not birth-related at all...) and everyone was totally in awe of the fact that I had my baby at home (on PURPOSE) and that I didn't have any pain meds. The fact that I had a water birth REALLY blew them away. I was scared of what they would say... me coming into the ER the day after a home birth... I could imagine all the negative comments that I could've gotten, but the amazement I got was kinda like a medal

The actual birth was so awesome though! I can't imagine getting meds... though if someone had asked me if I wanted meds when my water broke I probably would have said yes. Darned drug pushers in L&D... just another reason to have births at home!

love and peace.

[Peppamint]

Originally Posted by carla72

what you mean you don't get a medal. I am sooo dissapointed you see my dd is 18 months now and I was waiting for mine to come in the mail. I thought the mail was just slow. Had I known I wasn't going to get a medal I would have gone ahead and taken any drugs availablebecause it had nothing to do with the health of my newborn or anything.

:

Originally Posted by New Mama

It's interesting that women who have a successful natural childbirth talk about how wonderful the experience was (me included), yet you never really hear women who give birth in a hospital with interventions go on and on about their amazing experience.

: That is sooooo true!

[Peppamint]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

People still watch "A Baby Story"? Doesn't high blood pressure put women in the high-risk category? I'd think that show'd be counterindicated during pregnancy.

Amen to that! I can't post at many of the mainstream boards, especially during pg because my BP is the one problem I battle when pg.

[flyingspaghettimama]

I don't know what they're talking about at all. I got mine in the mail two weeks ago after my son was born at home in the water. It says right here: This Award For an All-Natural Super-Fly Kick-A$$ Homebirth goes to Flyingspaghettimama and Flyingspaghettibaby. It has a little gold foil star on it, from the Natural Mamas Hotstuff Brigade; and is signed by The Powers That Be. And it's solid gold, baby!

My first was born in a hospital with lots of interventions due to some serious medical problems on my part. Pitocin, epidural, mag sulfate, catheterized, IV pole for antibiotics, continuous fetal monitoring, mean nurses.

I found the homebirth much, much easier psychologically and physically, but maybe that's just me. I was lying in the water thinking, "wow, this is some good stuff! How about that!" In fact, knowing what I went through with the hospital birth is what got me to that point - if you can get through pit induction without meds for 12+ hours, you can get through natural childbirth no problem. The only downside- that endorphin high kept me awake for days afterwards!

[KittyKat]

That show IS "contraindicated" for me LOL!

I even watched an episode of "Birth Day" yesterday that was at the Birth Center in Bryn Mawr PA. The midwives were all going on about how birth is a natural process, yada yada, and the mom was doing the "labor dance" and doing GREAT! Then when she was almost fully dilated the MW had her LIE DOWN so she could shove her hand up there. The mom stayed lying down on her left side and I was like "There goes working with the mom's instincts... what was wrong with the dancing???"
Then after a few contrax she checked again and the mom had an "anterior lip." Hmmm couldn't be making her LIE DOWN had anything to do with that. All this after the SAME MW had said how making women lie down during labor makes it hurt more, etc. etc.

Then they had her pushing semi-reclined. At least they weren't telling her to "purple push" and counting. That was a mercy. They did break her water, though.

I was amazed that even though I was watching a "natural birth" at a MW staffed independent birth center I was still irritated at how the MWs did unnecessary stuff.

As far as "not getting a medal" I won't get a medal for ANY of the choices I make in my parenting or relationship choices... I still plan to stay married to my DH, raise my kids to be respectful kind human beings, breastfeed as long as possible, and try to maintain relationships with my extended family because family is important to me.
What the heck does a MEDAL have to do with doing what I believe is the best thing I could do for my children???

For the record, I had pitocin induced HELL with my first child and an epi

Kathryn

[SheBear]

LOL, carla72 and flyingspaghettimama! Someone fed me the "you won't get a medal" line recently, and I couldn't keep my mouth shut. I had to respond, "Yeah, because parenthood is all about the medals and awards and accolades from outsiders! Whatever was I thinking!?" I think I offended her... Oh well!

Forget watching birth shows, I can't even hardly hear about "mainstream" births without that vein in my forehead starting to pound....

Like when my sister's best friend's baby was born with a twice-wrapped nuchal cord "so the doctor HAD to immediately cut it! And then the baby wasn't breathing real well, so they had to give her some oxygen, and it was scary for a few minutes! And even after that, they just couldn't seem to get her to warm up enough. They were just about to take her to NICU when the nurses (who were sooo great!) thought they'd try putting her skin-to-skin on her mom's chest. And it was so amazing--it worked!"

OMG. Now, i get it that nuchal cords can be a problem sometimes. But usually they are not--they can simply be slipped around the head, no big deal. So, I dunno what was the situation with this baby--maybe they really did have to cut it immediately. I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. But why the surprise that she's having trouble breathing, when they cut her source of oxygen?? And why the surprise that she's not warming up if she's not getting adequate oxygen?? And why the HECK would skin-to-skin with mom be the last resort????!!

Arrrrgh......okay.....vein pounding....think happy thoughts, SheBear....