#2 Biblical Marriage/Wife Submission Thread - Page 27

[genifer]

Im liking this thread. Ive been waiting for ages to be able to post in the spirituality section here! Im gunna lurk for a bit

[AngelBee]

lilyka :

Please pray for me and my family right now. We are going through many challenges.

[bamamom]

praying right now, angel.

[afishwithabike]

I am lifting you up Angelbee. I hope you will ALL be okay. Blessings to your family, and may the strength of God be yours.

[afishwithabike]

Coming back in to make sure everybody is doing okay. I know this time of year can be difficult for those with allergies. I pray all is well.

[lilyka]

: angelbee - how are things going?

[bamamom]

angelbee, waiting for you to check in with us......

[afishwithabike]

Angelbee has NOT had a computer for a while. She was borrowing a computer to give us this update. I am not sure that she will be back soon or not.

[bamamom]

hmmm..I wanted to revisit something we discussed many months ago....someone brought up the topic of dress, hair, etc. Some of us said they dressed "Mennonitey" and some are just blue jean moms like myself. We also talked about the head covering, and wearing it in submission to God or husband.

I wanted to share a phenomenon that has been happening withme.

About 6 weeks agoI found a cool new hair clip at the store. For years whenever my hair got past my chin I was always trying to put it up. Out of my way. Well....I finally hit the jackpot. No more hair sliding, falling down, etc. I put this new clip in my hair and it is there til I take it down at night, sometimes eighteen hours later.

So my hair is now up and twisted away on the back of my head on a regular basis....and I have noticed that my dh Really notices when I take it down...because he doesn't get to see it that often! I never would have believed it, but I think i am beginning to understand why some cultures only want women to have their hair down and exposed at certain times. My hair is also growing really long now, simply because it doesn't torture me into wanting to cut it all off!!

Has anyone else ever experienced something like this? I almost feel like I have a secret weapon... he loves to twine his fingers in my hair while he is watching tv or something....and my hair always smells good because I twist it up whileit's still freshly washed, and when I pull it down the scent invades the place. Definitely powerful!

[afishwithabike]

Has anyone else ever experienced something like this?

YES YES YES......This happpens with us ALL the time. I tend to wear my hair in a bun most of the time. Mostly becuase it keeps DS from pulling it out of my scalp. DH doesn't like super short hair so this has ALWAYS been a good compromise for us. Soooo when I DO actually wear it down all bets are off. IT's like that toy that gets shoved into the bottom of the toy box. They find it and play with it ALL day. I personally feel pretty with it done that way.

[glorysmom]

Wow! Interesting thread ladies.
I'd like to join and share.
This is a subject I have been thinking a lot about lately. God has been changing my heart about being more submissive to my husband as to the Lord. First, submission does not depend on how godly your mate is being. My husband is a pretty radical guy, with many strange ideas so he can be pretty hard to submit to. So I would write off submissiveness, thats for the ladies with the perfect husbands. But I've been watching myseld and my lack of submissiveness to y husband is in a lot of ways similar to a lack of submission to God. A rebelliousness in my heart because God was not doing things "right". "Right" ,meaning, how I thing they should be. God should have made me different, made the world different, made y husband different, if he wanted Me to submit. I think that I know better than God. That is the rebelliousness in me. So I find that in submitting to my husband, crazy as he is, I am learning to submit to God. The real reason for submission. He is Whom we are really submitting to when we submitt to our husbands. It really does not have to do with our husbands being right, I am learning. However I do believe that we should never ever submit to something we feel in our heart of hearts is wrong or harmful to us or our children. This is up to each person to decide however. But there are times when we just have to trust that God is leading our husbands.
I am new at this, still learning. I'm trying to do things like hold my tongue when angry, smile more, have dinner ready when he comes home from work, let him have the last word, not act like I know more than he, trust him more, etc... My husband has been wanting me to be more submissive for a while, and I have been rebellious about it. I have been submissive in big things like I finally changed our diet like he wanted, we moved to where he wanted to move. But have a harder time beig subissive in small things. Or I'll do what he wants but not with a good attitude. So I'm being convicted in these ways. Sometimes I think it has to be a certai way but when thinking about things I realize that alot of things are not all that important, why put up a fight when I could just go with the flow.
This is an area I am learning and trusting my husband can be really hard. He has awesome faith and does not need to have others approval of his actions. He considers me being unsubmissive if I do not match his faith. Right now my faith is being put to the test. We are supposed to be out of our house in 3 weeks and still looking for something appropriate for our family. My husband is firmly convinced that if God wants us homeless than we shall be happily homeless. I don't want to be homeless with our 3 children! But I am praying not worrying.
Another test now is something I am so sad about. My husband has decided to leave our church we have been going to for 5 years, all my children have been born in and close to friends. Now I feel this is foolish of him, and can barely even talk about this because I feel so heartbroken. It will be very hard if even possible for me to still attend. And if I am submittig in my heart how can I do something so different from my husband. Theres so many tough questions.
Truly the submission is to God in all things.

[bamamom]

ma-corrina....WELCOME!! I had to laugh at your post, because it sounds like you are married to a dreamer with a lot of faith! His comment about happily homeless cracked me up! You sound like you are on the right track....none of us have perfect husbands..just read all our posts!

It is an attitude thing...I need to obey God first and foremost, and God tells me to submit myself to my husband. God also tells my husband to love me even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. Pretty big marching orders!

The whole submission thing has caused quite a stir here and abroad.....women who want to be the last word feel threatened by this.

For me, it is only about obeying God by being a blessing to my husband, which in turn blesses God that I am faithful! And I am blessed knowing my husband loves, and adores me.

It is a circle of life and love....being a blessing makes me happy, makes him happy, which makes me happy.

[bamamom]

ma-corrina...some more ideas.

It would be SO hard if our faith was split , ie by him leaving the church . I know that for some moms church is a huge fellowship moment and socialization. To let go of that is hard. I am assuming your dh is a Christian. Maybe, just maybe, you could ask him in a sweet way " Would it be possible for you to lead us in some scriptures(or bible study , etc whatever) once a week until you decide where we need to be ?" The load would be removed from you, and you could just give it to God and trust.

You mentioned that he considers you unsubmissive if you do not match his faith. I have no idea......this doesn't really sound Scriptural to me. I have never heard or read anything in my bible that says a woman is unsubmissive if her faith doesn't match her husbands.

Ladies, any thoughts? I don't have anything to go on with this one....

Corrina, read on and hopefully we can help'! We love new folks to join us!

[clynnr]

Hi all, just checking in and : for everyone. I haven't posted in a few weeks because...

We have a new daughter! Norah Kathryn was born Tuesday, April 25th at 10:53am, weighing 9 lbs 9 oz, 21" long.

This has been an amazing two weeks with DH home. Last pg I had PPD really bad after birth, and he finally made an appointment and dragged me to the doctor, so his two weeks at home (paid paternity leave!!!) were miserable for me because of the depression. This time I went on the meds just a couple days after Norah was born, and it has made all the difference in the world! I told him the other day that it has felt like a honeymoon.

He has to go back to work tomorrow, so please be praying for all of us--especially DD1, as she is very much a Daddy's girl and will miss him horribly. Two weeks of getting to spend every moment with him was wonderful for her, but tomorrow is going to be rough. Thanks mamas!!

[bamamom]

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!! I hated the day dh went back to work! I think he was secretly relieved! He always helps out alot after a baby, and it wears him out! Welcome to my world, honey!

I am glad you got help for the ppd....i wish I had taken some meds. It would have kept me from wanting to jump off a building!

[Lucky Charm]

Angela

[bamamom]

Originally Posted by afishwithabike

YES YES YES......This happpens with us ALL the time. I tend to wear my hair in a bun most of the time. Mostly becuase it keeps DS from pulling it out of my scalp. DH doesn't like super short hair so this has ALWAYS been a good compromise for us. Soooo when I DO actually wear it down all bets are off. IT's like that toy that gets shoved into the bottom of the toy box. They find it and play with it ALL day. I personally feel pretty with it done that way.

Here is a picture of the new clippy i have...it comes in better colors than tortoise shell...
http://www.goody.com/Html/StylishWom...ge1/index.html

this clip has revolutionized my life. And I look terrible in a bun! My hair would never stay!! And I have a not so fab profile (sorry , do I sound a bit vain?? )

It's the bottom left clip in the picture box...click on it..it's called an updo claw!

You can get these at walmart or anywhere, really. I pd like two bucks for them.

[lilyka]

Originally Posted by ma- corinna

Another test now is something I am so sad about. My husband has decided to leave our church we have been going to for 5 years, all my children have been born in and close to friends. Now I feel this is foolish of him, and can barely even talk about this because I feel so heartbroken. It will be very hard if even possible for me to still attend. And if I am submittig in my heart how can I do something so different from my husband.

welcome and what a great post. thanks for sharing all that.

as for leaving the church I don't havea lot to offer you here. I totally understand how sad this sort of thing can be. BUt here are some thoughts I had in no particular order. Perhaps you dh sees something that you can't becaue you are so caught up in the relationships and sentimental attatchments you have tot he church. we stayed in an awful church for so long because we didn't want to elave our friends, our children were born there, they were dedicated there we had watched the kids in the church grow up etc etc. Ya know what. we still talk top thoe people and do stuff with them. I still see those kids. and we are going to a better church in the mean time, have made more friends (not replaced, just added to) and looking back it is easy to see how bad that church was even though I never saw it while I was there.

and what if he is wrong. what if 6 months down the road he decided that this church is really where you belong. hey, you can just go back. and in the mean time you have been a blessing to your dh and a role model to your children.

[lilyka]

and you are so right about the little things. and those little things can be such big things though. It muight sem like a little matter but weather or not we submit joyfully can mean such big things to our dh.

[afishwithabike]

Originally Posted by bamamom

Here is a picture of the new clippy i have...it comes in better colors than tortoise shell...
http://www.goody.com/Html/StylishWom...ge1/index.html

this clip has revolutionized my life. And I look terrible in a bun! My hair would never stay!! And I have a not so fab profile (sorry , do I sound a bit vain?? )

It's the bottom left clip in the picture box...click on it..it's called an updo claw!

You can get these at walmart or anywhere, really. I pd like two bucks for them.

I love those style of clips. The problem is my hair is generally too thick for them. I ALWAYS break the teeth off in my hair. Most of my clips have two or three missing teeth, eventually I have to throw them away. If you have any tips for a person who has a LOT of thick coarse hair let me know. I am ALWAYS open to suggestion.