Birth & Beyond: C/S sub-forum? - Page 9

[dlm194]

Originally Posted by BensMom

Right! Thats what I keep trying to say. There are more issues than just the "medical necessity" of it. Legal constraints, provider availability, insurance issues, spousal issues, past birth history, etc etc. Its not so clear cut, which is why support is needed.

Good point! Once you've had a c-section, for whatever reason, all these issues come into play. Women trying to work through them need a great deal of support. They (well, I should say "we") need support and help beyond simply being told to find a midwife, even if it means traveling 4 hours. While I am completely supportive of actually going out and finding a midwife no matter what distance you must travel, women need to hear BTDT stories, they need to feel empowered, they need support in working out logistics and they need to keep things as stress-free as possible. I think a separate forum would better serve women faced with this issues. Unfortunately, if you haven't had a c-s and you haven't been looking into these issues, the answers are a lot more complex than they sound.

[AnditheBee]

Originally Posted by zs25

i had posted a thread on"healing after cesarean",i am unabale to search it.please can someone help me in doing so..
Thanks

Here it is:
http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...d.php?t=398118

[AnditheBee]

Originally Posted by dlm194

I think a separate forum would better serve women faced with this issues. Unfortunately, if you haven't had a c-s and you haven't been looking into these issues, the answers are a lot more complex than they sound.

Hmm...I just had the thought that perhaps having a separate forum where c/s questions could be asked and answered, would remove them from B&B and the pregnancy forum, where they are simply targets for people who don't know first-hand what the experience is like and have preconceived notions about it.

Maybe that's why people have felt hostility from others when posting c/s threads--because it's too tempting for those non-BTDT moms to hop into the thread and comment, when it's sandwiched between threads on RRL tea and avoiding episiotomies. If that's true, then separating the c/s threads to a new forum would effectively quell the problem, right? Again, am I being naive? I tend to think people are much more likely to post in a thread unrelated to them, if it's peppered amongst the other threads that they are connected to, than if it's in a forum that they have no intrinsic interest in.

In which case, if I'm right, then MDC is a good place for this forum. Thoughts?

[Subhuti]

Originally Posted by AndiB

I just had the thought that perhaps having a separate forum where c/s questions could be asked and answered, would remove them from B&B and the pregnancy forum, where they are simply targets for people who don't know first-hand what the experience is like and have preconceived notions about it.

Maybe that's why people have felt hostility from others when posting c/s threads--because it's too tempting for those non-BTDT moms to hop into the thread and comment, when it's sandwiched between threads on RRL tea and avoiding episiotomies.

Andi- Well said. I agree entirely. I've had an emerg. c-section and would like very much to do a vbac. There are many complicated issues I have questions on regarding whether I can or cannot do this. I would love to post here with other NFL moms and ask for help in noodling this out in the next several months. However, I would *never* feel comfortable posting on the B and B / preg forum. I agree, people are naturally drawn in to a discussion when it is plop in the middle of their board. If the discussion is segregated, at least there is a chance to have a judgement - free talk with other moms that have BTDT.
Liz

[annakiss]

I think the subforum answer will take a bit, but I'd like to get started on a c/s sticky in B&B for the time being. Please come share helpful links and information. It will be in the Birth & Beyond main forum.

[tbavrbab]

I'm obviously late to this thread...but I wanted to put in my opinion...

If I hadn't had MamaPear to call when I was being taken for a section for my premature daughter due to HELLP (want more info on what happened or why see my birth story - http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=630328 ) I never would have remembered some of the things to say or do so that I could come a little closer to my desired birth (: as if there was much left at that point!)

IF I have another child, I will be trying for a VBAC. I delivered "normally" with my son after all, so I know that I can do it...it will all depend on how sick I get.

I also know that I won't be nearly so niave in writing my birth plan next time...I'll include what I want for a section just in case...and this time I want to know things about breastfeeding with pain meds, cosleeping, slinging post section, explaining a section to a sibling who was prepared for a regular birth and being present, etc.

...but I sincerely hope that I will have one place I can ask those questions of women who will understand WHY I would consider cosleeping, slinging, or breastfeeding, why I wouldn't be "thrilled" to escape labor and have a "clean" "easy" section, or who would understand why I would have EVER considered letting my son be present for the birth of his sibling!

No mainstream parenting board is going to have those answers. Think for a moment please of WHERE I might find a board filled with people who could understand those types of concerns - regardless of the type of birth (home, UC, hospital, surgical) - and then please explain to me again why MDC is an improper place for a surgical birth forum...

A forum is, after all, merely one central location with posts asking those very questions. I know of no other place I could ask those questions and NOT be ridiculed. Imagine how long and convoluted a single thread that covered all those topics (and more) would be...(or simply go SEE the csection support thread ugh)

...Then maybe you can find some compassion for those moms who have lost their dream births and are now faced with finding a way to salvage what they can from a surgical birth.

[Rockies5]

This is a very thoughtful discussion and I don't know how I missed it the first time.

I agree that it would be beneficial to many moms to have a seperate forum for this and I support it.

So if this thread is now 4 months old...where is the C-section wisdom section? Maybe I'm blind, but I can't find it!!

[wombatclay]

There is a Natural Family Living Cesarean Resource sticky at the top of the Birth and Beyond forum...I believe this was the result of this particular thread/conversation.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=401645

It contains books, birth plans, websites, personal stories, etc that may be of use to mamas who had or who need to have surgical births.

[wombatclay]

It could happen....but then, I'm an optimist!

I know a lot of the concern was based on the idea that c/s support is available elsewhere online and that a c/s subforum would attrack either the "wrong" people to the boards, or attract negative posts by mdc mamas. (not saying I agree, but I think those were the big concerns on the part of the moderators).

But I think the subforum for selective/delayed vax might be seen in a similar light? I don't know how long it took before that subforum was realized, but if mdc can host a discussion area for natural living mamas who have choosen to vax (for whatever reason and in whatever manner) then there is a chance that mdc will could also provide a place for natural living mamas who are facing a planned surgical birth or who have had a c/s (and need support) but who are not planning further pregnancies (so not really included in the VBAC forum).

So you never know...

[erinwestpoet]

I just wanted to add my two cents here. I think it would be a very beneficial thing to have a C-section forum because women who have been through this have way different issues, both emotionally and physically. This time around, I am going to be prepared in case I end up with another C. I am currently researching homeopathic pain relief because there is no way I am going to pop Percoset this time around (I had no idea that was what I was given, btw). It would be nice to have a place to discuss this. I also think it is wise for any woman to be prepared in case her birth does not turn out as planned. Mine didn't and I didn't really think about all the issues surrounding it. It is important to provide information to women to make them empowered in all situations, but maybe especially in a surgical birth. It makes me sad to see the rude comments in other forums where women jump to the conclusion that the mom chose the c-section. I would think almost any woman on these boards was forced into the situation in some way (by circumstances or unsupportive caregivers). Also, think of all the things a forum like that could address specifically related to c-sections: pain relief, breastfeeding, caring for another child while recovering, exercise, nutrition, cosleeping, etc. Not all of us are lucky enough to have experienced an empowering waterbirth with our families joyfully welcoming our little one in song. Some of us laid on a cold hard table surrounded by tons of people we didn't know under blaring UV lights. When we saw our babies for the first time, we could only look and give a quick kiss before they were whisked away. Let's help each other fix this problem.

[angel1895]

Originally Posted by erinwestpoet

Not all of us are lucky enough to have experienced an empowering waterbirth with our families joyfully welcoming our little one in song. Some of us laid on a cold hard table surrounded by tons of people we didn't know under blaring UV lights. When we saw our babies for the first time, we could only look and give a quick kiss before they were whisked away. Let's help each other fix this problem.

:

[fullofgrace]

FYI: This thread has been closed for Admin review.

Originally Posted by wombatclay

There is a Natural Family Living Cesarean Resource sticky at the top of the Birth and Beyond forum...I believe this was the result of this particular thread/conversation.

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=401645

It contains books, birth plans, websites, personal stories, etc that may be of use to mamas who had or who need to have surgical births.

The requested info is there.


Forgot to add that there is a chat/tribe thread in Personal Growth you can check out: c-sec mommas-- growth & healing chat thread.