PPD w/#1 and not #2?

[maylea_moon]

Hello, I had pretty bad PPD after my son was born. Thankfully, I started taking meds right away and it went away within a few months PP. My son is now about to turn 16 months old and we're thinking about trying for #2. I'm so worried about experiencing PPD again and am wondering if any of you have had it with your first child but not subsequent children. Was there anything you did differently?

[crunchyconmomma]

well, just in the interest of a caveat - i THOUGHT i didn't have it with #2 for MANY months until i was venting on MDC about something and several people said it sounded like the writings of a depressed mom, and suggested i had PPD. took the quiz and scored really high. because all sorts of factors changed including some biggies like #1 being a medically managed hospital birth with drugs and #2 being a blissful homebirth, i thought i couldn't have it and ignored how miserable i was and how miserable i was making my family. i even remebered reading that when things are done naturally, like with a smooth homebirth, the hormonal cascades happen properly and PPD risk is greatly reduced. but i DID have it. so i got therapy help and was glad, even though it was VERY long after the birth (8 months).

i know you actually asked for accounts of those who did NOT have it on the second go-round, but if i could spare another mom from my misery i would love to do so. so even if you think you don't have it, pay attention for your personal clues and get help fast so you can get on with your life. good luck!

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

I had sever ppd with my dd. I was on meds till she was 18 months old. I was scared to have anouther but i knew that there was meds i could take so that helped me relax about it some. I had pg depression with him and took meds till 7 months pg. After he was born I went back on meds when he was 2 weeks old but was off them by 3-4months old. So the second time around was not even 1/4 as bad.

Every thing I had read said it would prolly be worse with #2 but wasnt that way Good Luck

[nikirj]

My PPD was quite bad with #1 (it was really scary, actually), but I didn't get it at all with #2. We had really braced ourselves for it and it didn't really come, in fact, #2 was such an easy kid and I was in such a happy place in my life, we coasted on through (not that these two things cancel out PPD, but I think that my PPD was badly aggravated by stress with #1). Now, this of course doesn't mean that you shouldn't prepare for PPD (the reason I suffered so long with #1 is that I had no idea I HAD PPD, psychotic ideation and all!) but definitely, it isn't guaranteed you'll have it with the next child.

[Kirsten]

I have three kids. Had raging PPD with dd2 but not dd1 or dd3. When we got pregnant with #3, everyone was shocked that we rolled the dice again, when I had had such bad PPD with #2. But I was fine.

You asked for differences between the PPD pregnancies/babies/experiences and the others. I have a few.

I had been dieting before getting pregnant with dd2. Lost 60 pounds and ended up thinner than was really right for me. So I think I was not "right" regarding my general health somehow, even though I felt ok and thought I looked like a million bucks. Had been on a 1200 calorie per day diet for six months shortly before conceiving.

Dd2's birth was PERFECT, with the most lovely midwife and a fantastic assistant, in the freestanding birth center on a day it was closed so we had the whole place to ourselves. Dh caught the baby. It was absolutely wonderful so I can't blame a thing on that.

But she had RAGING colic, screamed her head off 22 hours a day, almost never slept, we nursed til I bled as it was the only time she didn't scream. I really think the lack of sleep AND being forced to listen to your baby in pain hour after hour, day after day, week after week, month after month led to my PPD.

My dh was amazing but even so we barely made it through those four months. Someone told me their child had colic til 18 months - I wouldn't have lasted that long I know.

I didn't talk to any professionals (other than my midwives) or go on meds. If I was to find myself in that situation again, I'd go on meds in a heartbeat, and see a therapist weekly at least. It was such a hell for me, my dh, my dd1 and dd2. It was honestly awful.

So anyway, I think you can have PPD with some kids and not others. I had it once out of three kids. Hope for a non-colic baby and get lots of rest. Good luck.

[pixie-n-hertwoboys]

I had severe PPD w/ ds1 it was awful. A lot influenced the whole ordeal. No car and being cramped in a super small living area, stress, newly married, drugged medicated birth w/ 4 degree tears, the whole nine yards. I didn't take meds because I blamed it all on the above - not ppd. So with my second pregnancy I was prepared, did lots of reading and knew what to look for the next time. I also was more open w/ dh so he understood what I had felt during those months. We were prepared for the worst again. But even my whole pregnancy was different. I loved it, I was happy and looking forward to having another baby. So after ds2 was born I felt great! I also talked much more about my feelings, accepted help when offered and had a med free birth w/ no drama surrounding it.

[canadiyank]

I read somewhere that there's a 70% chance of recurrence of PPD. I did pretty well for about 6 mos. after dd2 was born and then struggled for several months after that. I went back on drugs last week - dd2 is over a year. I really wish I had "accepted" the PPD earlier, but I was so determined not to get it, and did so many preventative things. Plus, this depression is very different from the first - with dd1 there was so much situational stuff, like others have described (medicalized birth, 4th degree episiotomy, nursing probs), and my PPD was very acute - I couldn't even fold a diaper. This time it's different, I'm able to function but I'm still struggling. That being said, I know there's a light at the end of the tunnel...I got through it once and can do it again...