Death and Christmas--a pity party

[Nankay]

Sigh..it's that time of year again. It's always hard around the holidays when you have had a loved one die. For our family..we've taken it to the extreme.

In the last 8 years my dh and I have had 6 family members die during the week of Christmas. 6! We're talking both my Grandmas (X-mas day) Dh's, mom (the 21st) my mom (the 26th) dh's G'Pa (the 23rd) , and a close family friend who was "family" to us (the 20th). Dh's dad and my dad have now moved thousands of miles away and our family is virtually decimated. Our kids will never know Christmas with Grandma and Grandpa, and big family gatherings like we grew up with. It's sooo sad. In a way, I feel extra pressure to make Christmas special so the kids will have some good memories when they're older..like dh and I do. I'm afraid all they will remember is a month of weepiness and irritable sullenness from their parents.

There..pity party over. I'm sorry for the big dump.

[Katie Bugs Mama]

I'm so sorry.

[mama4gals]

Nankay, can I join the party? My mom died Nov 3, and Christmas was really hard for me this year. Your losses have been incredible. I am so sorry. BTW, I love your sig; how hopeful.

Liz

[lisamarie]

The holidays can be such a difficult time without our loved ones. Its not a pity party, but a remembrance and a time of lighting candles to honor them. Know that you are not alone in your grief or your tears. I was pretty teary eyed at times during the holidays and just told my kids that I was missing Mom and Grandma. They were so sweet and understanding. If I do get short tempered with them, I try to explain that part of the reason why is because of my grief. Kids are so understanding and forgiving. After my husband died in January of 2000, I thought that my ds would never have a happy holiday season. But time has helped us heal. We still reflect, but it isn't as raw as before.

Lighting a candle for all of our precious loved ones

Hugs~

Lisa

[polka123]

So sorry for your losses