~~How old is your child? And give us an idea of what you have for an academic schedule? What's the day like and what curriculum are you using??~~ Without knowing that here is my rambling answer- so please forgive if this seems way off base.
IMHO I am a former teacher too and I know it is the former teachers that have the worst time of it. I would not punish a child by taking away playtime to make them do book work, that only gives kids a neg. association with classwork. You can either work on adapting your child to your idea of homeschooling or alter your homeschooling to fit your child. My experience has been that it is much easier changing myself then others. Constant head butting with child is a red flag something has gone off track.
Maybe as a teacher, you might also be comfortable laying a dollar bill on the table and setting an egg timer. Tell your child when he finishes the work in the time allotted he can have the money. Some former teachers homeschooling like sticker charts, filling a page gets you a prize, also having friday field trips and if child does not work during the week they don't get to go. Having father be responsible for punishing child is another option. Dad is principal and hands out the demerits and Mom is teacher KWIM??
We are super relaxed homeschoolers, not unschooling- but the kids set their own goals and chose their own materials, also we set informal plans for time spent together. Even my 3 yr old inputs what she wants to do. We can do the work in 60 minutes a day or less now that the kids would have done all day in ps. The rest of the day they play or go to classes ~ they choose. They also have housework & pets to care for. I think children thrive on a flexible routine not a set schedule, as a parent of 4- it would be impossible to get things done if we were not this flexible.
~~~What do you do when your child does not want to do something unrelated to homeschooling? Like does not make their bed or brush their teeth? Or is openly defiant? DO you punish, explain, reason, gently discipline?? If your child was in school and you withdrew, was school a negative or a positive thing for them? Did the child wish to be homeschooled and what was the child's expectations??~~~
We miss a day or three of book work, it is no biggy because we learn year round. If you wonder how any child could possibly learn anything that way like multiplication tables, addition and subtraction facts, the Pythagorean theorem and the quadratic formula, etc., I have to tell you my oldest got a super high score on the ACT when he was 12 and is now in college taking biology and freshman algebra this year at age 14. He got interested in Math and Science and jumped into it because he was selfmotivated- not from textbooks but real life events that spurred an intrinsic desire to find out everything he had ??S about. I can remember him telling me how f=ma when he was 6 and I thought what on earth is he talking about?? He did not learn that from his science book
Rambling thought inserted here----It is as important to me that my kids like to learn and will be life long learners, more important then exactly how they learn it and at what age.
Is it possible that you feel (as a new homeschooler) very accountable to others like extended family and neighbors and need the seatwork as evidence that your child is learning or have a so/dh that wants to see the child learning in a traditional manner with direct instruction?? Do you feel you have something to prove to someone or are afraid of the resposibility of taking charge of your child's education so you may be pushing your child a bit hard??
It takes more then a couple months to fall into a routine that works and get out the kinks when you begin to homeschool. We rework our schedule every year actually. I would probably take a few months off so your child can come back to homeschooling with a positive vibe meanwhile observing what works in homeschooling families. Take some time to play with your child during that period, build a new relationship so the two of you can survive the homeschooling ups and downs. Let him make a few homeschool buddies for peers. Step back and Look at the big picture of homeschooling, set your goals first from there, the long term ones. I wish you the best and hope I have not offended in any way.
mom to ds14, ds9, ds5, and dd3yrs