When ds tunes me out

[Think of Winter]

Hello,
I've been struggling lately with getting my 24 mo ds to "listen" when I'm correcting him. For example, he had a friend over to play today, and almost as soon as she got here, he started throwing his toys. I think he was excited and expressing it that way, because he doesn't usually throw things. The first couple of times I took his hand and said "You may not throw your car. Cars are for pushing. Throwing could hurt someone." By about the 3rd time, I stopped, bent down to his level, and looked into his face. I wanted to make sure I had his attention. But he tried to look away, and when I got right in front of him, he wouldn't look at me. Normally I'd probably put the cars away at that point, but his friend was using them. I can't tell if I'm overwhelming him somehow and he has to shut me out, or if he sinply didn't want to do what I was asking. Any suggestions?
Thanks!

[Magella]

Your son is really little. I've found that at his age it's most helpful to say it once or twice, then if it keeps happening to offer another activity to replace throwing the cars. Redirect, distract. It takes a long time for little ones to understand that throwing cars hurts people, and a lot of repetition. Eventually they do learn, you can trust that.

And I don't push the eye contact/look me in the face thing. I'll ask my older ones to look so I know they're listening, and I will attempt to make eye contact with my just-turned-two year old. But I don't persist in asking or trying to turn their heads or get in their face-I think sometimes that gets overwhelming. I wouldn't like it if someone did it to me. They have ears, they can hear me, they just don't want to look at me. When he gets a little bigger, you can ask him to tell you what you said in order to see if he heard you correctly-this is another thing I do with my older two.

[Black Orchid]

I've noticed that my DD doesn't want to look at us if we explaining why what she is doing isn't a good idea. I've also noticed that she does hear me, even if she is not looking at me. Dpending on the situation, sometimes I'll remove us both from it and talk to her about it while sit together (removing distractions). If that is not logical or possible, I will show her how to properly use the item and if she insists on misusing, I'll put away for later when she will be better-able to focus on not abusing it. This might sound like punishment, but it truly is to avoid damage to herself or others.

[dharmamama]

I don't force my kids to look at me, but if they don't, I do ask that they repeat back to me what I have said so I know that they got it. I don't know how verbal your 24-month-old is, but if he can even say "no throw car" or "push car," you know he got it.

Namaste!

[writermommy]

It definitely sounds like excitment. My middle dd would act this way at 2 years old when people came over. She would jump. run, throw things and generally act up. I noticed it was happening when company was over and not so much when it was just us. What worked for me was sitting on the floor with her in my lap while she played. I didn't have to do this for long, maybe ten minutes or so. Just long enough for her to calm down and get into playing. Then, she would play fine. It was just the initial excitment of her little friends being in the house.

[IncaMama]

nak

my ds tunes us out 99% of the time when we "correct" him. we've started removing him physically from the situation (like leave the room) and talking to him there. then we go back into the room and continue playing, etc...it's worked like a dream so far.

[Think of Winter]

Thanks for all your responses and suggestions. I really need to find safe things for him to throw, and work on being patient and calm. That is the hardest thing about gd. Constant redirection is not easy to do. Take care all and thanks again.