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post #1 of 49
Thread Starter 
I was wondering how other SAHM think of this, esp. the AP parent because it seems AP parents are less in a hurry to put their child into school.

I am a SAHM parent of a 3 yr old bright little man.
People have often puhsed the subject of putting him into pre-school.
I am a SAHM I don't see why I should have to pay preschool for them to baby sit my kid for the one and only reason for him to socialise with other kids.
I believe I have more to teach my child than pre-school, we(hubby & I) are raising our son BiLingual(I am dutch Hubby is American). I also believe that he is not ready for school yet. I also enjoy the time I spend with him at home as his stay at home mommy.

Is this such a bad thing? Why must everyone always nose into someone elses life, and tell them how they should live, when I don't tell them how they should live.

No offense to those who put their children into school as early as 2.
But I don't see the hurry in putting your child in school that early.

Maybe its because I love teaching my son things myself, maybe its because I am not ready for him to be in school.

How do you feel about putting kids in school as early as 3?
Just very curious. I understand if you are a working mom, but when your a SAHM, I don't see why you pay for pre-school to have them take care of your child while you sit at home.
I just don't understand.

Thanks for reading, but I never get a real answer from mainstream moms, they always tell its a "social" thing, I think that is weird, because your child can socialise at 3 years old, without being put in pre-school, esp when they aren't ready to be in school.
post #2 of 49
Tell em to bug off...nicely

>>>Is this such a bad thing? No

>>>How do you feel about putting kids in school as early as 3? It's

Come on down to the Homeschooling board, it really dosn't matter if you plan on sending him to school later, you will still be welcome.
post #3 of 49
I put my ds now 4 years old into preeschool part time at three. He went for only 4 hours a week. He now goes 9 hours a week. Around here there are no kids his age to play with. We do go to the park and he is usuallly the oldest kid there. Most parents put their kids in daycare allday. Preschool help to get him around a steady group of kids to play with. I have also seen an improvement with behavior. If their were more kids at home I would probably kept him home.
post #4 of 49
I am with you, they have 18 years to be in school. They don't need to start now. Besides the research shows that any gain children may have in preschool is lost by like fifth grade and it is more important for them to develop emotional intellegence and firm attachment to parents at this age- that can't be caught up on later.

Even if my kid doesn't know ANYTHING at kindergarten (not likely ) he will be caught up by the end of the first month of kindergarten. Honestly it is like crawling up stairs, if you don't have stairs in your house and so your kid never sees a stairs in an hour after he is old enought to crawl up stairs he will be crawling up and down them as well as a kid who had stairs in his house and has always been playing on them.

And your right- a heck of an expense to do what? Catch the flu?

I think that my kids are getting pleanty socalized at the park and at play dates and toddler groups. I don't see the value in it.
post #5 of 49
post #6 of 49
post #7 of 49
Originally Posted by DoubleOven
I actually read recently that any advantage kids have in Kind. is lost by 1st grade!! I guess it also depends a lot on the individual child, too.
Lets go with your number
post #8 of 49
I didn't send my dd to prek last year when she was 3. She goes a couple hours a day T-F now (at 4) and enjoys it but really it's just a playgroup to her anyway. I really don't see much value in pre-k for my kids except that dd enjoys it and since we just moved here it's been nice for her to meet some kids. But I didnt send her last year and when people asked why, I just said I thought she needed to be home more. Most people left it alone after that.
post #9 of 49
My son is in speech at my old elementary school twice weekly. I homeschool him. They bugged the PISS out of me to put him in preschool for weeks. They've finally hushed about it.
post #10 of 49
Well, my son is only 2, but I think a lot of 3 year olds would not be ready to be away from home for that period of time yet. It's a big step.

I don't think preschool is all that necessary and of course you can teach him much more at home - at home you can teach him whatever you want, basically - as much or as little as you feel is appropriate!!

INDIVIDUAL schooling is almost ALWAYS going to have better results than schooling large groups of children.

So if anyone bugs you about it, maybe you can just tell them that you've taught him way more than he would learn in preschool.

I don't mean to offend anyone with children in preschool, every family is different.
post #11 of 49
I put ds1 in preschool at 3 (which is late around here, even for SAHM's) because he really needed the time with an alternate authority figure. He had a lot of social anxiety and the little time away (4 hours a week) was a good segueway for him. It was extremely valuable and I don't think he would have had such a good transition to Kindergarten if it were not for his 3 yo teachers and the program.

For us it was not about socialization or anything academic, it was to help him work through his anxiety and panic attacks in as gradual as way as possible.

So for some of you it may seem like but for us it was absolutely necessary.
post #12 of 49
The government-funded research done on preschool has been done on Head Start (low socioeconomic) children. They benefit from preschool because they often don't have access to the nutritious food, variety of books, trips, and a variety of things that many children are accustomed to. Preschool is not necessary at all. Provide a stimulating, wholesome, loving environment for your child. Encourage her to interact with the mailman, the neighbors, the grocery store clerk, the librarian, children in the park, etc. She will get a much wider variety of socialization that way - in comparison to being in a preschool surrounded by 30 other 3-yr-olds all day.
post #13 of 49
Originally Posted by kaliki_kila
She will get a much wider variety of socialization that way - in comparison to being in a preschool surrounded by 30 other 3-yr-olds all day.
Sorry to butt in again, but do you guys who are against preschool think it's some kind of all day thing?

For us and at least one other poster that I saw, we're talking 2 hours a day, 2 days a week. Which leaves plenty of time for all sorts of other things.

Oh and if you're in a class all day with 30 other 3yo's, you need to find a better preschool.

Just to clarify.
post #14 of 49
Originally Posted by jkpmomtoboys
Sorry to butt in again, but do you guys who are against preschool think it's some kind of all day thing?

For us and at least one other poster that I saw, we're talking 2 hours a day, 2 days a week. Which leaves plenty of time for all sorts of other things.

Oh and if you're in a class all day with 30 other 3yo's, you need to find a better preschool.

Just to clarify.
I skimmed the thread and assumed it was all-day preschool because all of the children I know who attend preschool attend from 8-5ish, dropped off by their parents on the way to work. I do know one child who goes part-time, but certainly not as little as only 2 hours a day, 2 days a week. 30 other 3-yr-olds was being sarcastic. It bothers me when people say children who don't attend preschool aren't getting the "socialization" they need. Children should be socialized with people of all ages, not just their peers. Preschool is a great way for your child to get together and play with other kids, sure, but not a great way to socialize your child with the community.
post #15 of 49
I will not be sending my kids to preschool. It might be all well and good for some. A fun structured activity time and a break for mom. But not in any way necessary and no more beneficial than any structured activity that gives mom some away time. Great for moms who want it and have the money. Nothing missed for those who dont.
If you want some really good reasons why not though, you might want to read "Hold On to your Kids" It really put the whole value of early socialization in new light for me.
post #16 of 49
My ds is 20mos old, he is enrolled in Head Start home vistits, I was hesitant at first but we actually enjoy it very much~ sometimes we go to the library for story-time but mostly the teacher Gloria comes over once a week for an hr and a half and we do arts and crafts ect.. My ds really likes her also I couldn't have been luckier to have Gloria be the one she is a spontaneous, down to earth, yoga-loving, kind-hearted being
post #17 of 49
Going from 8 til 5 is not preschool; that is daycare. It bugs me when daycares call themselves preschools....

I have three kids. The first two each started co-op preschool when they were three. It was two hours a day, twice a week. One of those days I stayed to work in the classroom and the other I dropped her off. So on any given day, you had the teacher, 16 kids and 8 moms (or the occassional gramma, aunt, dad, grampa, etc.) I am trying to remember (has been quite a few years) but almost all of the moms in the co-op were SAHMs.

It was fabulous for them and for me. They got to play with other kids their age and yes, learn some socialization. They got to practice at what a school environment was like when they weren't expectations of perfection; it was a learning process. They made friends, as did I. I got a lot of support from those co-op moms. My child learned she could accept help from other trusted adults. There were lots of opportunities that were not generally available at home - the woodworking area, paint/messy and varied art/playdough every day (we do have these things of course - I just don't get them out all the time), toys different than the ones we had at home including a sand/water table, etc.

I think co-op preschool is a great transition from being home with me all day - for them and for me! My dh said I needed the transition more than they did... So that first year of preschool (when they were three) was co-op as described above. Second year of preschool (when they were four) was your classic drop off style - four days a week, two and a half hours per day. I did volunteer in the class here and there. Then off to full day kindergarten (all that is offered in our alternative, multi-age elementary). Both dd1 and dd2 did this, and dd3 will start preschool this fall when she is three.

Besides liking preschool for what it was for the kid in it, I loved having some one on one time with my dd2 when dd1 went to preschool. Same for dd3 when dd2 went. Usually the second and third kids don't get that one on one time with the parent like the firstborn gets. My second and third got that when their older siblings went to preschool.

Plus it was fun!
post #18 of 49
I think three is awfully young for a school environment.

We plan to homeschool anyway.

That said, recently I have, a few times, thought longingly of putting Ramona in preschool with the hope that perhaps she would learn that the world does not revolve solely around her.

If people give you a hard time about preschool, simply tell them that you believe that your son is getting everything he needs and more by being home with you.

post #19 of 49
I am Mama to two children and my oldest went to school at 2.5. She is a brilliant little girl (I know we all think our kids are bright!) and she asked to go. She LOVED it. Still does. We did a really thorough search and found a great school for her and she adored her teacher, still does. She went three days a week from 9-1pm. I do not work outside of my home and had visions of homeschooling my children, but I can see that my oldest will not enjoy that option she loves going to school everyday. And I don't think it makes me a less AP Mama, rather more so, in our case because I am responding to her direct needs as opposed to my pre-conceived notions of what would make her happy.

You know your children, child very well and know what would make them happy. I have a friend whose daughter was not ready and she took her out and kept her home. It's different for each one. But I personally do not think it is a bad idea to send them to school if they want to go and I think socialization is a complicated thing and underrated thing. As a former college professor, I think more and more teenagers and young adults could benefit from a return trip to kindergarten and pre-school where sharing and ethics are the norm.

Good luck with your family's decision,
post #20 of 49
My oldest was homeschooled until he was 5.5 (then we opted for school) but the 2 younger went to preK at 4.

I just dropped my son off this morning. It's a very happy place. The teachers are wonderful.

I found that in my area there weren't enough opportunities for homeschooled kids of that age. Homeschooling does work for a lot of people here of course but not for us.

I see preK as being a transition into full-time school. I don't think it's necessary but it can be nice.
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