Chores, allowance, and household help with 11 yr?

[brownay2]

Just wondering if mamas here could help me. We have a dilema, my 11 year old ds is constantly fretting over how much he gets paid for allowance, and everythng he does he expects to be paid. So I was wondering what you thought would be a reasonable allowance for a 11 yr. old, in 5th grade. Also what you feel he should be doing to help out this household for his age, without getting paid, and what chores would be condidered to be apart of the allowance. That way I can show him this is what I am asking you to help with to work towards your allowance, and this is what I feel you should be able to do as part of our family.

Our family situation:
- 1 income
- 2 dogs (Great danes, that are poopie machines)
- Have 2 toddlers ages 3 yrs., and 1 yr. old
- Currently expecting a girl any day now.
- Husband works from 6am-till 10pm so he is never home to help with the children, or the household chores------->SIGH
- Ds has his own room, and bathroom.

I would really appreciate some insight here, to make an agreement that is appropriate for his age. Thanks!

[PajamaMama]

My dd is almost 11 and gets $10 a week, on Mondays. The only stipulation is that her own room can't be a fire or health hazard! Meaning, it doesn't have to be clean to my standards, but there needs to be a clear path to the door and window, and there can not be any kind of food or food wrappers, containers, or dishes in there.

We also have one (generous) income, a toddler, a poopy-machine dog, and right now my dh is out of town for the week, which happens about every 6 weeks or so. We also homeschool so everyone is in the house a lot, so more mess is made. We're not in exactly the same boat, but close enough!

She does have other specific chores, but they are not tied to a tangible reward, just are her contribution to the family. They are:

1.She cleans up all dog poop inside our fenced in back yard, and she is responsible for feeding and watering the dog.
2.She is responsible for watching her sister (age 2-1/2) while I am taking a shower or taking out the trash, or any job where I can't pay attention for a few minutes but am still right in the vicinity.
3.She is responsible for helping dh clean up after evening meal while I bathe the toddler. I expect them to have the table cleared, food put away, and dishwasher loaded. They generally leave anything that doesn't fit in the dishwasher for me to finish up later, because I am picky about greasy residue on the pans.
4.She is responsible for keeping her bathroom fit for guests to use, since it is solely her bathroom unless guests are here.
5.She brings her laundry to the laundry room and sorts it.


That's it for things that she is expected to do on her own without being reminded, but I do expect her to pitch in if I'm doing other things and ask her to. For example, she will help me with food prep if I ask, or will vacuum if I ask, but isn't responsible for those things on a day-to-day basis.

$10 a week meets her needs with room to spare. What does your son need money for? I don't expect dd to do anything with her money except spend it on herself, or save up for a larger purchase that I don't want to pay for myself (one example is a new bike helmet, she wanted but did not NEED it as she already had one, it cost $30 and I paid half and she paid half)

You didn't mention what his allowance amount is, so it's hard to offer any more than this. I hope you can work something out with him, it seems unreasonable for him to expect to be paid for everything! Maybe you can pay him for everything he asks for one week, and at the end of the week hand him an itemized bill for all the 'services' you've performed (meals, rides to wherever, laundry services, etc) and that would wake him up! Just make sure he 'owes' more than he 'earned'!

[DBZ]

Does he do chores already? Right now I do not give either of my big kids an allowance because I can't afford it. However my 11 yo recently gave me a list of good reasons why she should get an allowance. I am actually considering it. If I do, I'll give my 8 yo one too but she will get less.

I am willing to consider an allowance because my dd does a lot to help me around the house and she doesn't whine, complain, or expect an reward for it. She changes the giunea pig cage, empties the dishwasher (shared chore with 8 yo), takes out the trash, flips the laundry, and offers to help with the baby. In my house the allowance will simply be reward for a helping out. If my kids ever act like they are owed this then I'll stop the whole thing.

Kara