Quote:
|
Originally Posted by lauraess
I am hoping that in your anger you can try to find some compassion for a a mom, Yes a sick- as in : Ill mom who loved her children just as much as anyone. When It comes to what happens in a persons brain and body with mental illness No-one can really know. I sincerely hope when people wonder about these situations they remember it was a MOM . If she really wanted to simply be rid of the kids she could leave, right? But see, when a mom is soo terribly ill and her head says all kinds of things there isnt rational thinking that says "whoa, no lets not do THis."
What needs to be said and shown over and over again so people can WAKE UP and see their neighbors, sisters, wives, aunts, clearly is that Mothering is a tough tough thing and the hormonal upheaval and illnesses that make themselves known at this time need to be checked and rechecked, again and again.
|
ITA! Unfortunately, the attitude displayed in the post lauraess is responding to actually DISCOURAGES sick women from seeking help. Yulia_R, I have to say that your words are really not nice. You called a severely mentally ill woman a "nut mom". Did you really think that was a kind thing to say about a mentally ill person?
Yulia_R, it seems that you know very little (I'd venture to guess it's more like nothing at all) about postpartum mental illness. Postpartum mental illness can be classified as PPD, PPP or PPD-OCD. PPD is the one we all know about - the depression and lack of motivation many women go through after their babies are born. PPD-OCD is less common and much less discussed.
In a case of PPD-OCD, a mother will have constant thoughts about killing her baby. I mean CONSTANT. (But mothers w/PPD-OCD never actually do it.) I had PPD-OCD and I couldn't stop thinking that I was going to hurt my child. I didn't *want* to hurt my baby! I loved her with all of my heart and couldn't understand what was happening to me. I finally decided that, in order to protect my baby from myself, I would probably have to kill myself. Because of the attitudes of people such as yourself, Yulia_R, I was afraid to tell anyone. I was afraid everyone would think I was a horrible mother and that my baby would be taken from me. Luckily, I decided that it was a chance I had to take. And fortunately my husband was understanding. I got help and was better within a few weeks. I really just needed to TELL someone. If everyone were as unsympathetic as you sounded in that post, I probably would have decided to kill myself instead.
Postpartum psychosis, which is what Andrea Yates had, is the worst of all. Not only do these women have bizarre thoughts of killing their babies - they actually believe these thoughts are messages from their creator. They believe that killing their children is the RIGHT thing to do. And part of PPP is paranoia, so although they believe it is the right thing to do, their paranoia prevents them from telling anyone about it. And when they are rational enough to realize they have a problem, they're so afraid of being labeled "nut moms" and having their children taken away that they can't seek help. From there, it all spirals downward, until someone gets hurt. These women didn't want to hurt their children.
I'm sad that in this day and age, our society still has so little compassion for the mentally ill that we make them fearful of seeking help. It is society's fault when a woman becomes so unstable because of mental illness that she kills her children. If more women were made aware that this is a possibility, it's only an illness and nothing to be ashamed of, that there is help and treatment available, that she is NOT a "nut" and she is still a good mother, then maybe more women would get HELP before it was too late. But as long as we're going to treat them like the'yre monsters, this kind of thing will never end.
My heart breaks for everyone involved in that sad sad situation 
:
I think you are quite eleoquent for sure!------ Now, If only you could be in this persons FACE and verbalizing it!
Any mother who kills her children (especially when she doesn't benefit from it in any way!) is OBVIOUSLY mentally ill in some way and needs treatment. I really don't get how anyone could argue (a la Andrea Yates) that she wasn't ill.
