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A wasting food WWYD - Page 2

post #21 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by dharmamama
:

I'm glad someone else brought this up. I wanted to but I didn't feel comfortable doing it. Americans have this idea that we are entitled by our comparative wealth and privilege to be finicky and fickle. My Ethiopian son and daughter either ate what was served or didn't eat, and personally, I see NOTHING wrong with this. "Needing" to have lots of food choices and saying it's not healthy to eat food that isn't totally appealing "right now" are products of extravagence. Wasting food is a a cultural artefact that I don't wish to pass on to my kids.

Namaste!

I totally agree with you. In our house, they have to at least TRY what is served. I am not a short order cook. My oldest will try to get sweets (we keep very little of that around) for a snack, claiming he is SOOOOO hungry. I tell him that there are apples on the table and bananas, and if he is that hungry he can have one. But OH NO. My thing is, if you are really hungry, you will eat the apple if it is there and he DOES like apples. The only time I make an alternate meal for the kids, if it is something I KNOW they do not like and me and DH just want to have it, like fajitas or something extra spicy. But most nights, it is "eat it or leave it". Even our 1 yr old is getting adventurous and loves most things I cook, cut up small of course. He makes the most of those 6 teeth, LOL.

About the sandwich. Next time, I would tell DS that he can have his own sandwich, and that is it. If he refuses, well, he will eat at the next meal. A refused meal or two is NOT going to hurt a child.
post #22 of 104
i, too, really want to teach dd good things about food use.

she's nearly 22 months. i really like the rule about if you ask for it, you have to eat it before you get something else. (in addition to the issue of wasting food, i think it's tied to learning the importance of words.. i don't know how to explain what i mean, so i'll move on.)

but i find it difficult to do that at this exact stage (i try to do lots of small portions, though), simply because i'm not confident that she always understands what i'm saying (ie, "you asked for that pita bread with cheese, so i don't want to warm up the pasta for you, i'd like you to eat what you asked for...)

my question is: for those of you that implement some form of this rule in your house, at what age did you start being firm about it?
post #23 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby
We've talked about food, and how food costs money, and if we waste money on food then we don't have money for fun things like toys and the like, but ds either doesn't get it or doesn't care.
I went back and re-read your post and I had another comment. I'm not being critical here, but as a conservation advocate, I wanted to say that perhaps you can teach him to not waste because it's simply wasteful. Not because there won't be money for toys (although I realize that seems to be a natural motivator), but because it's our responsibility to not be wasteful. Just a thought.
post #24 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bufomander
my question is: for those of you that implement some form of this rule in your house, at what age did you start being firm about it?
Dd will be 4 in a few weeks. It is a hard and fast RULE that we do not waste in general, but it's not perfect in practice. Dd and I frequently put things in the recycling bin together, explaining all along about what we are doing. She has been to a "reduce, reuse, recycle" program at the library. I think she really understands what we are doing, but not yet WHY. The other thing we do is to talk about how we can recycle her food if she doesn't want to eat it. For example... a turkey sandwich... you can toast the bread in the oven, turn it into breadcrumbs, and make (from scratch, of course), turkey with mac and cheese, baked off with the breadcrumbs on top. I've never actually done that, but this would be something we'd at least TALK about. So, we're not yet FIRM about it, but we try in every way we can.
post #25 of 104
ITA with OTF. I won't force my child to eat the sandwich now, but if he wants a snack or something different to eat he has to finish what's in front of him first. There have been many times where he has said my belly's full from dinner (and only eaten a small scoop of pasta) but then he'll eat three bowls of ice cream. We don't waste food in this house.
post #26 of 104
I do think it is appropriate to teach children that wasting food is not very responsible. We discuss this with dd on very simple terms. But I do not think forcing a child to eat anything is OK. Kids can learn the message without being forced to eat something. I like the idea of finding other ways to make the food useful....composting, feeding to cat/dog, etc.....
post #27 of 104
I serve very small portions to little ones. I also don't have a prblem with wrapping it up and taking it in the car with us, or using it for a snack later. There is a whole lot of room inbetween "eat this or you get nothing else" and "Let's throw this entire sandwich in the trash, because who cares"

Storage/freezing aren't dirty words, afer all. You would also be surprised at what leftovers a hungry child stuck in traffic, or waiting for a sibling to finish gymnastics class , will eat.
post #28 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom
There is a whole lot of room inbetween "eat this or you get nothing else" and "Let's throw this entire sandwich in the trash, because who cares"
I think it takes lots of time and patients to teach values. They are not learned by being forced to do something, but by example-- through the messages we give every day in the way we live. I give small children small portions. We save leftovers for later and talk about not being wasteful (not just with food). But I would never say a child had to eat everything they requested. I just don't think forcing an issue is the best way to learn. The child is likely to focus on the unpleasantness of being forced, rather than the value you are trying to pass along.
post #29 of 104
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by velochic
I went back and re-read your post and I had another comment. I'm not being critical here, but as a conservation advocate, I wanted to say that perhaps you can teach him to not waste because it's simply wasteful. Not because there won't be money for toys (although I realize that seems to be a natural motivator), but because it's our responsibility to not be wasteful. Just a thought.
Oh, we most definitely have talked about the responsibility of not wasting food. It just didn't seem to be sinking in for ds - after all, all he sees is an overabundance of food all around him. And I haven't wanted to get too heavy about the whole "other people don't have enough food" issue because it feels a little too deep for him right now. He gets very upset about people being hurt or sick, so I don't want to introduce confused hurt feelings into the picture. So I tried to go the route of wasted food=wasted opportunity to do fun stuff.

And I guess I wasn't totally clear in my OP - when I said "force" I don't mean physically forcing it into his mouth or making him sit at the table until he ate it. I meant not fixing him any other food until that was eaten. But I got off easy, as here is what happened: About 15 minutes after I wrote this post, he asked for some oatmeal. I explained to him that he still had the turkey sandwich from earlier, and that I was disappointed that he tore it up instead of eating it. He went ahead and ate it without complaint, and then I made him some oatmeal.

I'm still not sure entirely how I feel about this. I agree with both sides - I agree that it's important to teach respect for food and instill responsibility to not waste it unnecessarily, but I also firmly believe in following a body's hunger cues. We do have an overabundance of food, and we do have those choices - that is a luxury that he is growing up with. I just want him to understand that it is a privilege and a luxury.
post #30 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby
Oh, we most definitely have talked about the responsibility of not wasting food. It just didn't seem to be sinking in for ds - after all, all he sees is an overabundance of food all around him. And I haven't wanted to get too heavy about the whole "other people don't have enough food" issue because it feels a little too deep for him right now. He gets very upset about people being hurt or sick, so I don't want to introduce confused hurt feelings into the picture. So I tried to go the route of wasted food=wasted opportunity to do fun stuff.

And I guess I wasn't totally clear in my OP - when I said "force" I don't mean physically forcing it into his mouth or making him sit at the table until he ate it. I meant not fixing him any other food until that was eaten. But I got off easy, as here is what happened: About 15 minutes after I wrote this post, he asked for some oatmeal. I explained to him that he still had the turkey sandwich from earlier, and that I was disappointed that he tore it up instead of eating it. He went ahead and ate it without complaint, and then I made him some oatmeal.

I'm still not sure entirely how I feel about this. I agree with both sides - I agree that it's important to teach respect for food and instill responsibility to not waste it unnecessarily, but I also firmly believe in following a body's hunger cues. We do have an overabundance of food, and we do have those choices - that is a luxury that he is growing up with. I just want him to understand that it is a privilege and a luxury.

Not sure why you are not discussing the many pp's who suggested just giving him VERY tiny portions at a time. (like 1/6 of a sandwhich).

Why would this not give you the best of both worlds. Very little waste if he did not eat it. Un-messed with food left over. No having to tell him that he must eat it to get someithing else???????????????????
post #31 of 104
just wanted to chime in, I also really hate wasting food. I state this all the time to my kids "We dont waste food"...lol... What I do is #1, the kids are asked to try everything... ds (4) has been really good about this, but recently is trying to tell us he no longer "likes" this, that and everything else , at preschool he eats everything they serve (many things he wont eat for me).. so my rule is, you eat some of dinner, or nothing else. The kids pick their breakfast and lunch, and generally eat whatever they ask for, dd (2) will often try to pick something else bc ds picked it after having started eating her food.. and I stand fast at eating what she picked first, hten she can have it... it took once or twice and she is really good about that now. If my kids dont eat, I assume they arent hungry (which they arent, sometimes), and make sure htey know when they leave the table, no snacks. They are really good about this bc its a hard rule (never changes) and they dont often bring up hunger after dinner, though they are quite hungry for breakfast .
post #32 of 104
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by maya44
Not sure why you are not discussing the many pp's who suggested just giving him VERY tiny portions at a time. (like 1/6 of a sandwhich).

Why would this not give you the best of both worlds. Very little waste if he did not eat it. Un-messed with food left over. No having to tell him that he must eat it to get someithing else???????????????????
Cuz I already said in one of my other posts that I was going to chalk this up to a learning experience, and that next time he asks we will tell him he can't have the whole sandwich. But it's not really the best of the best because he WANTS the whole sandwich, and then I'm feeling stupid denying him food that he is asking for. But now I know that that's what needs to happen for a little while.
post #33 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by OnTheFence
If you don't eat it you don't get any snacks, treats, other food until you do eat it. .....Often at times this was the last thing of that sort to eat, which really makes me upset because to me its like a form of stealing.
Are you serious??

I can't get down with the idea of withholding food from my children or forcing them to eat something they don't like. And the stealing thing doesn't make sense to me. How is it like stealing?
post #34 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaverdi
Feed it to the dog or the cat or the neighbor's dog or cat? Or take the bread and feed ducks and eat the turkey? Or feed the turkey to a stray cat?

We don't waste food here as a matter of course, but find creative solutions for food wastage that might occur. Like composting. It's another way to recycle.

This is good stuff right here! Creative solutions, thinking together about it...etc.
post #35 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by OnTheFence
We have had similar issues at our house. Kitchen rules are that if you ask for it, you eat it. If you don't eat it you don't get any snacks, treats, other food until you do eat it. If you still don't eat it, then you will not get served that food again. None of my children now are allowed food from "us", the adults in our home. Often times they will beg for something we are eating only to waste it. Often at times this was the last thing of that sort to eat, which really makes me upset because to me its like a form of stealing.

You think your children are stealing from you when they ask for something and do not eat all of it? Just so I can understand what you are saying...

If your child asks for some crackers from you, and you give them to him, and he eats two but crushes a couple of them on the table he is never allowed to have crackers again? I have searched my brain for a respectful way to say that this post freaks me out and makes me said... this is it.
post #36 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by pjs
ITA with OTF. I won't force my child to eat the sandwich now, but if he wants a snack or something different to eat he has to finish what's in front of him first. There have been many times where he has said my belly's full from dinner (and only eaten a small scoop of pasta) but then he'll eat three bowls of ice cream.

In this case I would just save whatever he didn't eat of his dinner in a tupperware or other similiar container, and let him eat his ice cream.
post #37 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby
Cuz I already said in one of my other posts that I was going to chalk this up to a learning experience, and that next time he asks we will tell him he can't have the whole sandwich. But it's not really the best of the best because he WANTS the whole sandwich, and then I'm feeling stupid denying him food that he is asking for. But now I know that that's what needs to happen for a little while.
I reframe it in a positive way. Make the kid a little wee sandwitch. If the kid wants a bigger one, say "Sure!! You can have a bigger one when you're finished that one ".
post #38 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby
Cuz I already said in one of my other posts that I was going to chalk this up to a learning experience, and that next time he asks we will tell him he can't have the whole sandwich. But it's not really the best of the best because he WANTS the whole sandwich, and then I'm feeling stupid denying him food that he is asking for. But now I know that that's what needs to happen for a little while.

I do not understand how you are "denying him food" when you WOULD under the suggested plan give the whole sandwich, just in 1/6-1/4 segments.

Why in the world is this "denying him food"????????????????????????
post #39 of 104
One more quick thought. Eating food when you're not hungry for it, is more of a waste than composting it or throwing it away. If you eat food you don't want/need it comes out as poo. Which is polution.

Also, eating is a sensory experience. Which is more of a waste, for a child to tear up a bun, or make crafts with homemade playdough or macaroni, or tear up paper?
post #40 of 104
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamajama
I reframe it in a positive way. Make the kid a little wee sandwitch. If the kid wants a bigger one, say "Sure!! You can have a bigger one when you're finished that one ".
I agree. I think making eating and food such negative things is sad and rather controlling. Eating and preparing food is a social aspect of a family. Children need to be able to say when they have finished and not be punished for it (by witholding food).
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