I'm 40w5d today...and still no baby. I was so hoping NOT to have to go down to the midwifes clinic today (it's 1hr away...okay we got there in 35min cuz traffic was good, but usually we allot 1hr travel time) and it's a pain...I so wanted to be holding my baby by now, but she seems content to stay put.
Past 3 days I've been irratible, emotional, hormonal etc...which is good and bad, right? Bad because I'm horrible to be around (my poor 5yr old), but good because I think it means my hormones are shifting and this baby may decide to make an appearance soon...which is now also good and bad. UGH! When I went into labour with DD2, it was the morning after DD1's birthday...the one where my parents didn't even call to wish her happy birthday...I was so upset...(they didn't call me that year on my birthday either)...I literally bawled for hours that night and went into labour the next morning...so that's why I think my emotionality is a sign that things are getting close.
Only problem is now the timing really sucks! We had this great window between the 3rd and 17th of January...and now it's gone. My doula leaves for Mexico...I have a back up, but her DH is poised for an emergency business trip, likely to be late this week. She's leading a seminar on Saturday and wouldn't be available if we go into labour then. My DH has been gone this afternoon (left right after the midwife appt and still isn't home), and will be out at a symposium all day tomorrow (like 6am - 10pm)....that he can not miss (unless I go into labour)...oh and it's 1hr away as well.
Then I come home to an urgent message. There has been a death in the family of very dear friends. These people have been like surrogate parents to me. His cousin passed away today...her husband recently passed in Pakistan and both sons are currently returning from burial services there...DIL is alone here. They are coming either tomorrow on Thursday...most likely they will want to stay with us...it wasn't 100% clear when I spoke to him, but he mentioned "stay with us"...which I'm not sure if he intended to mean visit with us or stay at our house during their stay here. We've been out of touch for several months, so they didn't realize I was pregnant...and certainly not this pregnant...and would have NO idea that we're planning a homebirth...and I can't turn them away...they aren't certain what their plan is yet...but oh my gosh! She has a bad back too...and I have a sofa bed which is marginally comfy...normally I would put them up in my room, but it's all prepped for birth and the baby.
Oh and did I mention that both my midwives are off call as of Friday and won't be back on until Monday? I mean there is a back up...but it's still not the same, ya know? They're going to discuss me at tomorrow's staff meeting because I'm out of area and they have to verify that everyone is still willing to travel to me.
I guess the good thing we came across was that the College of midwifery here will allow homebirth up to 43wks so I have an extra week as long as things remain good on the BPPs. First BPP is scheduled for Friday, second for Monday...I'd so rather not make either BPP...but then again if baby waits until Monday I get my midwives back...but baby before Friday is looking really bad right now time-wise...I'm sorta hoping tonight (like I have every nice for the past 2wks), but that will really screw things up for DH tomorrow...
Ugh! Thanks for listening to my vent. I'm going to have a bath and a cup of tea...hoping DH will bring home a movie...if he ever gets home...he's still in a meeting 1hr away!
Past 3 days I've been irratible, emotional, hormonal etc...which is good and bad, right? Bad because I'm horrible to be around (my poor 5yr old), but good because I think it means my hormones are shifting and this baby may decide to make an appearance soon...which is now also good and bad. UGH! When I went into labour with DD2, it was the morning after DD1's birthday...the one where my parents didn't even call to wish her happy birthday...I was so upset...(they didn't call me that year on my birthday either)...I literally bawled for hours that night and went into labour the next morning...so that's why I think my emotionality is a sign that things are getting close.
Only problem is now the timing really sucks! We had this great window between the 3rd and 17th of January...and now it's gone. My doula leaves for Mexico...I have a back up, but her DH is poised for an emergency business trip, likely to be late this week. She's leading a seminar on Saturday and wouldn't be available if we go into labour then. My DH has been gone this afternoon (left right after the midwife appt and still isn't home), and will be out at a symposium all day tomorrow (like 6am - 10pm)....that he can not miss (unless I go into labour)...oh and it's 1hr away as well.
Then I come home to an urgent message. There has been a death in the family of very dear friends. These people have been like surrogate parents to me. His cousin passed away today...her husband recently passed in Pakistan and both sons are currently returning from burial services there...DIL is alone here. They are coming either tomorrow on Thursday...most likely they will want to stay with us...it wasn't 100% clear when I spoke to him, but he mentioned "stay with us"...which I'm not sure if he intended to mean visit with us or stay at our house during their stay here. We've been out of touch for several months, so they didn't realize I was pregnant...and certainly not this pregnant...and would have NO idea that we're planning a homebirth...and I can't turn them away...they aren't certain what their plan is yet...but oh my gosh! She has a bad back too...and I have a sofa bed which is marginally comfy...normally I would put them up in my room, but it's all prepped for birth and the baby.
Oh and did I mention that both my midwives are off call as of Friday and won't be back on until Monday? I mean there is a back up...but it's still not the same, ya know? They're going to discuss me at tomorrow's staff meeting because I'm out of area and they have to verify that everyone is still willing to travel to me.
I guess the good thing we came across was that the College of midwifery here will allow homebirth up to 43wks so I have an extra week as long as things remain good on the BPPs. First BPP is scheduled for Friday, second for Monday...I'd so rather not make either BPP...but then again if baby waits until Monday I get my midwives back...but baby before Friday is looking really bad right now time-wise...I'm sorta hoping tonight (like I have every nice for the past 2wks), but that will really screw things up for DH tomorrow...
Ugh! Thanks for listening to my vent. I'm going to have a bath and a cup of tea...hoping DH will bring home a movie...if he ever gets home...he's still in a meeting 1hr away!
Sounds very stressful! I hope things settle down for you soon.
