UGH! Can I vent here?

[Charmie981]

I post on another, very mainstream board. As much as I KNOW I don't fit in there, I still post and I'm very involved. I guess I see myself as a missionary to the mainstream community or something. MDC is my hideout. I hang out here to feed myself, and now I have to vent.

I HATE when someone there brings up homebirth...just hate it. Yeah, there are a few of us there who homebirth, but not many at all. And everytime a homebirth thread comes up, so does every excuse in the book. You wouldn't belive how many people jump on the homebirth threads and say "Oh, I'd love to, but..." My current favorite is a thread where a paramedic jumped on and said that she's had to answer calls for homebirths and there's no way she'd EVER do it "not to scare you or anything, but..."

Yeah, well, I feel that way about HOSPITAL births, thank you very much. There's no way I'd EVER EVER EVER EVER in a million years plan a hospital birth after the way my son's birth went.

Anyway, I just hate that people feel the need to excuse their dependence on doctors and hospitals. Why not just admit that you don't have confidence in your body and you don't want to take responsibility for your pregnancy and the birthing process??

GRRRR!

[owensmom]

That is so frustrating! I hated hearing it from everyone I said it to .... my favorite was "don't you know how much it hurts?!" No, first baby, don't know, don't care. I'm nervous about the next time, because with the first I ended up having to be induced due to stupid state laws saying I can't go past 3 weeks overdue with a midwife. I'm sure people will be all over me..."remember what happened the last time...". Ugh.

Glad this place exists, or I'd be lost!

[Chloe]

I am so glad this place exists too.

I haven't had a homebirth yet, but hopefully I will have my 3rd at home! I almost had the 2nd baby at home unplanned! It turned out to be a wonderful water birth but in the hospital, after only four hours of labor. Next time I might not make it to the hospital, even if I planned to. I was 8 cm when I got to the hospital, and I was so calm...I thought I was only 5-6 cm. I didn't really believe I was in labor! LOL I practically birthed my baby myself. THe midwife offered encouragement when I needed it. It was a perfect birth, except for the hospital part! LOL

I know...I'm one of those people you are venting about I'd love to, but... my reason is not because I think it's safer in the hospital. I get so tired of the hospital garbage too. (signing papers and general always in your business stuff.) It's my dh- he isn't "ready" for it. Though the way my labor just went a few months ago, had I not made it in time to the hospital, I don't think there's much he could have said, since he didn't even make it to the birth on time. that's the other not perfect part! Well, I have about 2 years to get him to come around! Fortunately I have met some home birthing moms IRL through Mothering.com, and this way he can learn about how wonderful and safe it is. I have met the home birth midwives, and they are so nice. So, if I can get him to meet the midwife with me- they give a free first consultation...I might be able to get him to believe in my ability to birth!!! He's silly- but he's worried, I guess. He's very traditional, but I have gotten him to see things in a new light, and even he got annoyed with all the questions they ask and the papers they make you sign. So we'll see! I am praying to the Gods and Godesses, and whoever will listen! :LOL

Francine

[crayon]

I think I know the other “mainstream” site you are talking about. In fact I think the paramedic reply was to a post my DH wrote. It is so hard to be on that site, with all the women crying and wining about how much they hurt all the time. I come to this board to get real advice and real support. It happened about a circ question too, that girl asked for why/why not? So my DH posted and the girl said she was offended by his post! What? It was a question on the reason you are or are not doing it? I even had the moderator e-mail me and go off on me about my DH views! Is it too much to ask someone to read a book, to educate ones self, to understand the non-stop train of interventions? Why is it such a shock that I want to enjoy my birth, that I want my husband to touch me? I love the girls who say that “yes, he is a man!” Like he has no feelings about our baby, like he didn’t create this child with me and like he should have no right to enjoy birth as much as me! These are the women who have “elective c-sections and inductions” because the baby maybe to big! Poor girl, she may have to push out a 8lber instead of a 6lber!
I hear you!!!