Preschool for our 3 yr old???

[Moonmomma07]

I am wondering if I should put my 3 year old(now 2 1/2 and the school is accepting enrollments for August/fall time) in preschool and if it will benefit her in the long run. My dh doesn't like the idea since I am a sahm. He thinks that I should be teaching her what she needs to know right now.(plus he doesn't like the price- not that we can't afford it) Right now she interacts with other kids in playgroups we go to, but is very shy and attached to me. She has never really been away from mom or dad and family lives far away.

I have an opportunity to put her in a preschool for 4 hours 4 days a week. I would rather it be less but I LOVE the program and teacher.(she only takes 6 kids too)

I thought it to be a time for her to learn some social skills and give me a chance to spend some quality time with baby #2 coming in 2 months.(baby will be 5 months or so when she enters preschool)

I don't know if it will be a good thing or not. I am not sure if my hesitation is just "mommy missing my baby" blues that are normal when kids go to school or if I am pushing her into somethhing that just insn't necessary yet. Advice/suggestions? Benefits of disadvantages that you have seen?

Thank you!
Wendy

[nurnur4evr]

I entered my DD in a preschool program last fall, which started on the day she turned three. It was four days/week, three hours/day. I also thought that it was the perfect program. It turned out to be too much for our family - too much time away from her (I missed her), too much structure (they wouldn't go to two or three mornings a week), and too much money for what it provided (don't even ask!). So, I pulled her out after three months. She wanted to be with me, which she told me every day. There were much better (and cheaper) alternatives available for her to learn preschool stuff, such as storytime at the library, programs at the local children's museum, a great gym/nursery program at the YMCA which I can use while I work out, etc. I also got a book on preschool activities and use the songs and crafts from it. Although I was convinced that this was the right program for my daughter, now I don't miss it at all, and I have no plans now to send her to preschool again anytime soon.

I read somewhere that children do not separate easily from their mothers until age 3 1/2. When my other daughter was about four, I put her in a two-day-a-week Waldorf-style preschool, and she LOVED it, in fact, she would beg me to leave. Timing is everything.

By the way, my daughter loves the program at the Y, and she loves the caregivers there. I leave her there for about an hour, two mornings a week while I work out. She gets to see other people she likes, play with new toys and run around the gym, and make friends. I get a little break, and I also like that I am role-modeling exercise for her, so it will seem like a normal, fun part of life. She is used to that environment. It is also very inexpensive, about $2/hour. Whenever I feel that my daughter needs preschool, we head on over the the Y.

It is precious time when they are this small and it will be gone before you know it. Your daughter may be ready to explore the world more in a year or so. I would treasure this time. It is a gift to appreciate.

[pattisak]

pre-school or not

My children are so extremely different from each other (as all kids are definitely different!) so my oldest couldn't wait to go to school and begged for me to leave once we got there but my youngest prefers staying at home with me. I think you just have to go with their individual character and do what you, as a mother, know in your heart. I would have been doing my oldest daughter no favors keeping her home to be with me when she so strongly wanted to go to school and be with kids her own age. I also wouldn't have helped out my youngest to force her into a situation that she didn't want to be in by sending her.

[lauren]

It can be a real blessing to be able to bring your preschooler to preschool when you have a new baby. This would give you the chance to nap a little when the baby naps, etc. I also found that my child really enjoyed having a social circle "out there" after a new baby---it gave him stimulation and enjoyment and something to come home and tell us about. It just gave him a little bit of separation from the intensity of adjusting to the new sibling, that I found was incredibly helpful for him.

[oceanbaby]

Hmm, I found it soooo difficult to be shuttling my son to preschool and back when I had a baby. I was always having to wake the baby up to go pick him up on time, or the baby would be crying in the car on the way home, or I wouldn't have time to take the baby out on a walk or anything because I was rushed to get him down for a nap so he could be awake in time, etc. Plus, my son picked up all sorts of colds that he then passed on to the baby, and me, which made life very difficult. I found it much easier to have ds1 home with me than to have him in preschool, but I guess it depends on the kid. Ds1 is very helpful, and was really attached to his little brother. Even though I love his little private preschool and think the teachers and director run an awesome program, I wish we hadn't sent him. We're a happier family all the way around when we are all together.

[velochic]

I don't have two kids, so I can't answer to that part. I will say that I think, as in all other aspects of parenting, it's important to listen to your child. As great as the program may be, she may not like it. Or she may love it.

That being said, my dd started an all-day, 5 days a week preschool (yes, preschool, NOT daycare) when she was 3.5 yo. The whole summer I fretted over whether or not she could handle it. It was her first time being away from me. She is THRIVING! It has truly been harder on me than her. But I went with her cues and we've done the right thing. If she had ever shown signs of NOT thriving, I would have pulled her out in a hearbeat and sacrificed the thousands of dollars of tuition.