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Purge Your Mama Guilt! - Page 3

post #41 of 90
I feel guilty for dragging my then 5 month old son across the country, once because I thought we would have a better life out west, and a second time only months later because I discovered moving away was not the answer to my problems.

I feel guilty for weaning him at 6 months, not seeking help and learning about the dynamics of breastfeeding during pregnancy, thinking that weaning him completely would "make things easier" because I had picked up a job in the evenings.

I feel guilty for having another baby so soon after having my first.
I feel guilty because my second child is, in my mind a witness to my crimes of infidelity. I was 5 months pregnant when that all went down.

I feel guilty for not quitting smoking with my first child, and not quitting with my second until I was well into the second trimester. But at least I've finally quit.

I feel guilty about the first night I ever spent as a mother with my firstborn, sitting in a dark hospital room trying desperately to nurse him, even though he was getting frustrated because the drugs made him so sleepy and uncoordinated he just couldn't latch on. He screamed and cried, and so did I. But once again I never asked for help. When a nurse came around 5am to check on me, she asked if I wanted her to take him to the nursery and give him a bottle. I was so exhausted and defeated I said yes.

...there's more I just can't think of it right now
post #42 of 90
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mama Poot
I feel guilty for dragging my then 5 month old son across the country, once because I thought we would have a better life out west, and a second time only months later because I discovered moving away was not the answer to my problems.

I feel guilty for weaning him at 6 months, not seeking help and learning about the dynamics of breastfeeding during pregnancy, thinking that weaning him completely would "make things easier" because I had picked up a job in the evenings.

I feel guilty for having another baby so soon after having my first.
I feel guilty because my second child is, in my mind a witness to my crimes of infidelity. I was 5 months pregnant when that all went down.

I feel guilty for not quitting smoking with my first child, and not quitting with my second until I was well into the second trimester. But at least I've finally quit.

I feel guilty about the first night I ever spent as a mother with my firstborn, sitting in a dark hospital room trying desperately to nurse him, even though he was getting frustrated because the drugs made him so sleepy and uncoordinated he just couldn't latch on. He screamed and cried, and so did I. But once again I never asked for help. When a nurse came around 5am to check on me, she asked if I wanted her to take him to the nursery and give him a bottle. I was so exhausted and defeated I said yes.

...there's more I just can't think of it right now



just remember that you were doing your very best, you were doing the best you could at the time.

post #43 of 90
I feel guilt because I'm not a perfect mom.
post #44 of 90
I feel guilty...

for hitting my ds (I'm so ashamed : ) in anger
for yelling at this sweet innocent little boy
for yelling at dh to stop yelling at ds (when he doesn't do it half as much as I do)
for depriving ds of precious mama time by getting pregnant with dd so soon
for not realizing (at the time) that my milk had dried up and ds was not getting enough nourishment
for being overweight/unhealthy and therefore more easily tired and unable to keep up w/my active toddler
post #45 of 90
i feel guilty for thinking the worst of my poor tired little boy when he wouldnt let his little brother look at his medal and feeling emotionally cold toward him and not encouraging him to cuddle up while we read our story but cuddling his little brother.

i feel guilty that i let it become such a big deal to me that i was grumpy to my dh.

i feel guilty that i didnt have a chance to make it up to ds1 as by the time i left ds2 sleeping he had fallen asleep on his bed without a kiss or a cuddle.
post #46 of 90
I feel guilty that I can't hang on my son's every word as he talks to me all day, every day.

I feel guilty that I chose to look at MDC and am going to bed without doing the dishes as the fruit flies multiply.

I feel guilty that it seems to take everything out of me just to keep up with the most basic of things when it comes to child and home care, mostly because I am daydreaming or not focusing.

I feel guilty because my health isn't great and I am not doing everything I can to improve it.

There's more, to be sure, but I am going to bed.

L.
post #47 of 90
i feel guilty that my dd has to go to a fultime dc/ps because i have to work ft.

i feel guilty everytime my dd cries - mama i want to be with you i dont want to go to school and i cant do anything about it.

i feel guilty i cant buy her the organic food i want to.

i feel guilty i couldnt get her the icecream seh was dying for today when i promised her i would.

i feel guilty she has had hives for two months and i thought they were insect bites which i know she is allergic to.
post #48 of 90
I feel guilty that i was "perfect" until my mc. After the mc i just became...broken - dealt with ptsd issues and everything went downhill. I hemoraged (sp?) bedly and was on bedrest and iron shots. DD (16 months at the time) started watching tv, eating crap and slowed WAAAY down on nursing. I didnt ecourage her to nurse more and build my supply back up. I cried daily for a very long time.

I feel guilty for arguing with dh in front of dd

I feel guilty for not enjoying the first 3 months of dds life. I was so shell shocked from our traumatic birth that i just could not even do anymore than nurse her and feed me.
post #49 of 90
I feel guilty for sometimes wishing I could just run away
I feel guilty when I say no to dd when I could easily say yes
I feel guilty that I can't keep the anger out of my voice sometimes
I feel guilty that I look forward to her going for a nap
I feel guilty that I'm having another baby
I feel guilty that dd has a mom with a mental illness
post #50 of 90
I feel guilty about a lot of things.

I feel guilty for screaming at my son that I was going to send him to *big school* and caused him to cry, all because he wouldn't read his Bob Book...
post #51 of 90
I totally need this thread today.

I feel incredible guilt for weaning my DS. He'll be 3 in less than 2 weeks, so I know he's gotten enough milk (I just weaned him a few days ago)...but he wasn't ready. We've had a tough few days, and I'm very sad for the loss of that incredibly special relationship.

I feel guilty for being angry at my son for fighting sleep (because of the weaning).
post #52 of 90
I feel guilty about so many of the same things posted here.

I also feel guilty about doing ads for infant formula and hi-tech maternity hospitals. (I'm a freelance graphic designer so I can stay home with DS).
post #53 of 90
there are so many things i feel guilty for and ashamed of

a couple of times i have had a friend or two over at nite and gotten a little drunk, while the kids were in bed, and a couple of times they woke up

i have pushed my toddler 2 when she was trying to jump on me and baby

sometimes my toddler watches to much tv

sometimes not giving kids the most nutritous foods

so much more...
post #54 of 90
I've posted it before, but I do feel guilty for not having put 2 of my children in carseats the day I wrecked our van (this was over 5 yrs ago!). I was just going up the road, and I let them sit on the seats. I then lied to the police that they were only in seatbelts (not even that!) so I wouldn't even get a bigger ticket. My sister was with me, and we both made up the story. I've learned my lesson though, and my kids are always in the carseats when we go places now.
post #55 of 90
I feel guilty for spanking my dd, and teaching her to fear my anger and authority instead of how to communicate her needs. I have guilt for ignoring her when she has communicated her needs, or told her that my needs are more important.

I sat in a church on Christmas Eve and I begged and prayed with God to send me another baby. When they told me I was pg with twins I prayed for God to take one of them from me. I felt so overwhelmed and angry. When my ds was born he was in the NICU for a week with premature lungs. I barely went to visit him until they told me he could nurse. I was terrified of him. Part of me felt like that was my karma for not wanting him in the beginning. When he was well and we finally had them together and at home I cried and felt as if I had made the biggest mistake of my life. I've spent the last year of my life waiting for them to outgrow their infancy. Now they are toddlers and I want them to be babies again. I can't believe I ever thought I could live without either of them.
post #56 of 90
I feel guilty that I broke my own rule of 1 TV show/day and allowed my son to watch the Sprout channel ALL DAY LONG while I lay in bed w/a migraine.

I feel guilty that I often lose my cool when he's having one of his oh-so-frequent tantrum and I totally lose it and yell at him.

I feel guilty that, even though I'm the parent who's uber crazy about safety, all his scars have occured on my watch.

I feel guilty because I'm going to have to go back to work and I worry how that will affect him.
post #57 of 90
What a great thread Annakiss!

I feel guilty because sometimes I worry that dd will get some horrible disease and that the IL are right (they think I'm crazy for not vaxing). I know I shouldn't give power to those negative thoughts, and I try not to think about it, but sometimes I do.

Sometimes I put dd in plastic diapers because I'd rather go on the internet or go to sleep, rather than washing her diapers (like it takes so much effort to walk downstairs and turn it on!!??) Everytime I feel guilty inside and almost ashamed of it. I need to keep in mind that her needs come before my pleasure.

I feel guilty because dh and I yell, cuss, and talk meanly back and fourth. Sometimes serious, sometimes we're playing. But dd shouldn't be listening to that. It DOES affect her.

I feel guilty because everyday I throw dd in her playpen, turn on a stupid baby einstein movie, and I do a load of laundry, or cook something, or get on the net for a half hour. I always feel so guilty because she whines and fusses a little, and I know there has got to be something better I can do. I know I could sling her and do laundry. But it kills my back and I worry about her falling out when I bend over.

I feel guilty because sometimes we don't have any money to buy baby food and I have to bf dd all day even though I can tell she's "hungry" and needs something more.
post #58 of 90
I feel guilty becuase I screamed to DD once

I feel guilty becuase I can't be the perfect mother that my DD needs(sounds stupid I know)

I feel guilty becuase sometimes DH and I leave DD with MIL to spend the night by ourselves, and seeing her crying when we leave brakes me heart

I feel guilty that my milk finished to soon and I couldn't breastfeed her as I should have.

And much more..
post #59 of 90
I feel guilty because I yell waaaaaay to much.
I feel guilty because I never feel like being intimate with DH
I feel guilty that I ignored my PPD and my family suffered for it.
I feel guilty that I am not a great mom.
I feel guilty that I'm not a great wife.
I feel guilty that I don't make money to help support the family.
I feel guilty that I can't keep the house clean.
I feel guilty that I gave up on nursing far to early with my DD 1
I feel guilty that I'm a weak willed person.
I feel guilty for not being happy with my life.
Whew thanx for that.
post #60 of 90


We are all great moms, remember. No ones perfect!
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