I knew this was going to happen, but...

[Mrs Dimples]

...it still irritates me to no end! : I post on another board, and since I am due maybe-in-February-maybe-in-March I lurk on both due date boards there (and here). Well, of course the early-Febers are getting ot 38 weeks and they're all freaking out that they're NEVER going to go into labor on their own! Whatever will they do? I guess they'd better all be induced ASAP because they're only 1 cm dilated and 75% effaced at 38 weeks. Clearly, those babies are NEVER going to come out. Their bodies are all defective, plus we don't want the babies to get any bigger than 6.5 pounds lest they need a C-section.

Believe me, I am starting to be really ready to have this baby, and I'm only 36 weeks-ish. I understand feeling like you will be pregnant forever. I understand being uncomfortable. I understand fear of the unknown. I understand the excitement and the anticipation and the waiting and waiting and waiting...

but that doesn't mean I'm going to go and get induced! I THINK these things, but I KNOW that realistically I have probably at least another month, and quite possibly 6 weeks. Or more. I hate to be the one to always chime in and say, "yeah, but normal gestation is in the 38-42 week range, and some women go longer"...I don't want to seem heartless, or unsympathetic - hell, I'm pregnant too! - but COME ON! It's incredibly frustrating. Someone always asks the question "Why is everyone being induced?" and everyone immediately chimes in with "Oh, I have a medical reason"...and some do, I'm sure, since their doctors don't know about the connection between prenatal nutrition and toxemia, or whatever...but the fact that you're at 39 weeks 2 days and have not given birth yet is NOT a medical reason! Or the fact that "they" think your baby is over 8 pounds is NOT a medical reason!

Please no one come down on me because you were induced for a legit reason. I'm just venting here because I think some of you will understand, so I don't say something nasty over there and get everyone's panties all in a twist. I have managed to avoid doing so all this time, even though I am a real live BF and HB advocate (and a NICE one at that! And tactful! Who would have thought?) and I just need to let off some steam. I sincerely hope my mid-Feb. EDD is more accurate because otherwise I will certainly be the last freaking one left in March with no one to commiserate with since they've all gone off and been induced at 38 weeks.

[MamaChel]

I can understand where you're coming from. My "medical" reason for induction at 40w 6d? My OB was getting married in 4 days and wanted his schedule "cleared'. Didn't take so he sent me home. They wanted to induce as early as 36 weeks on me to prevent a "big" baby. I tend to run into 41 weeks anyway, we just didn;'t know it then.

It seems like most people think that women are incapable of going into labor on their own. Everyone 'needs' an induction so why not just schedule it anyway? (Don't get mestarted on the "big baby" crap......)

Sorry you're dealing with that. I'm about 36 weeks myself, sometimes I wish I was one of the women who go naturally at 37-38 weeks b/c these last 4-6 ish weeks last F-O-R-E-V-E-R. Oh well, I don't know of any woman who has been pregnant forever.

[ellie_may12]

I totally know where you are coming from!

When the ladies on the other board start talking about when their c sections are scheduled for or when their going to be induced, it makes me wonder how many of them REALLY need these.

I don't want to be induced. I have had nightmares about this. I keep waking up with dreams that my water has broken and I have to go get induced....being a FTM, I'm probably just afraid I won't be ready.

[melamama]

I give you a huge amount of credit for even being able to read the posts on a mainstream board. I am not that patient or understanding. When I read posts around here about mamas hoping for 6lb babies I really felt unrooted.

What gets me is that --yes, the last weeks of pg are uncomfortable and filled with anticipation, but it's really your last chance to go to a movie (if you can sit through it) or go out to dinner with your dp or just have a moment to take a long shower. I have absolutely no regrets about completely focusing on the babe for days and months and maybe 2 years, but the baby inside is easier than the baby outside.

and I could care less how dilated and effaced people are.

[txgal]

This is a little off topic but your post reminded me of an episode of "The Baby Story" recently. The mom was hoping to VBAC and doc was all supportive until the end. She came to the hospital in early labor. Baby was fine, mom is contracting and dialating, but doc decides that baby is too high and will not come down, so off to surgery we go. WTF??? Of course he was sure to put this fear in her at her prenatal appointment a few days earlier, telling her that he didn't think it was going to workout because baby hadn't dropped yet. Don't most second baby not drop until labor starts anyway. So sad to me that this mom wasn't educated enough to advocate for herself and baby.

[MamaChel]

Neither of my babies dropped until WELL into labor. My water didn't break with #2 until 30 minutes before he was born. SOB broke it w/#1 about 2 hours before he was born. I despise all the BS scare tactics they use.

[Mrs Dimples]

Thanks guys. This is the crux of it, I think: why not just let things happen, and see what happens? If c-sections are so quick and efficient, then why not just let things develop a little and THEN do a c-sec if it turns out that one is needed? Why all the preempting of nature? It's like your annoying MIL or whoever who just doesn't know when to SHUT UP! People being induced at 39 weeks because the baby's too big, or their blood pressure is too high...you know what, that baby's been in there for 39 weeks, and I bet the world wouldn't end if you just left them in there for another week or two and see how it goes. My goodness. Just leave it be!

Oh, and another thing. A trip into L&D isn't really necessary every time you get more than one BH in a row, or every time you have discharge, or every time you have a backache. Good grief. We're a month away from giving birth - our bodies are preparing, and we feel kind of crampy and weird! How about that? If you go into the hospital enough times, you're bound to start to think you belong there and just stay one of those nights...why obsess and make things even more tense for yourself the last weeks? Same concept: just WAIT and SEE what develops! If I called my doc every time I had contractions or discharge they would probably induce me early too, just so I'd stop bugging them! Of course, I don't have a doc, but YKWIM...

OK, I think I'm done venting for today. Not positive, but pretty sure. Thanks!

[Stephanie L.]

You said it! No woman has been pregnant forever! I have a friend with MANY children and once said, "you start to appreciate the last few days/weeks of pregnancy because after that baby is born you'll get less sleep and become more busy!"

Don't worry, even if your water breaks you don't neccessarily HAVE to get induced. (I didn't for 8 days!)

You will give birth... the longer you hold on to that baby, the stronger he/she will become.

Best wishes!!

[CaliMomof5]

I totally understand - it's so frustrating to sit back and watch. I really hate that moms expecting twins are being scheduled for induction at 36-37 weeks - why not keep them in their as long as they want? If they are healthy and thriving - it doesn't make sense to make them come earlier! On one list I post on, someone told me that I was scaring first time moms when I told them to question their docs and not accept what they say as law. She thinks women should trust their doctors implicitly - after all, they would NEVER do anything to us or our babies that would harm us. We should all be sheep I guess and bow down to the almighty doctor, because they know what's best for us poor, stupid women.

[jessiemom]

I totally understand where you are coming from too! Both my other kids came at almost 42 weeks, I sometimes wished I would have them at 37 weeks but that was not in the cards and I still had healthy normal sized kids and fairly easy deliveries as well. I am gald my doctor does push inductions or anything. I know my baby will come in it's own time and when it is ready.

Jessie

[Mrs Dimples]

Originally Posted by CaliMomof5

I really hate that moms expecting twins are being scheduled for induction at 36-37 weeks - why not keep them in their as long as they want? If they are healthy and thriving - it doesn't make sense to make them come earlier!

Yeah, this is my last complaint and then for sure I am done! Sigh. Just because twins sometimes come earlier doesn't mean they have to! It's so weird.

[RedOakMomma]

Scheduled induction for twins at 36 weeks? Wuh? When I was prego with the twins, my doctor didn't even MENTION induction! Admittedly, he got a little nervous when I was heading past 40 weeks, but the thought of taking babies out pre-term just because they're twins is SO ridiculous!!! :

Mrs. Dimples, I give you credit for hanging out on the "normal" boards...this pregnancy I've just stayed away from them. If it's not someone talking about induction as if it's as easy as a teeth cleaning, it's someone talking about breastfeeding like it's "gross"....or maternity leave that's "boring".... or babies that are "bad" because they cry too much....or babies that are 2 months old and won't sleep through the night... It makes my heart ache, both for the ignorance of the moms (just in some things...like the fact that being induced raises your risks of maternal death and c-section) and the misunderstood babies.

Best of luck keeping your sanity with the induction folks....if they knew more, they'd be singing a different tune (and staying home for the early stages of labor!! Totally agree with you on that one.... )

[AppleCrisp]

Originally Posted by RedOakMomma

Scheduled induction for twins at 36 weeks? Wuh?

They do this a lot at the hospital where I work. I don't know why but they treat twins as very high risk so they over-manage them.

I told my OB I didn't want to be induced....he said it was totally natural, the same exact thing your body was going to do anyway, he's just "helping" it! Which is just silly.

[ellie_may12]

Over-managed!

Originally Posted by ahwuko

over-manage

That is just how I am starting to feel about my pregnancy!

This is my first pgncy and I didn't know what to expect...so they do an AFP and it comes back positive...they want to do an amnio which I refuse. So, they are making me do u/s's every 4 weeks...which I really don't mind seeing my baby, but it means I have to go to the Women's hospital over an hour away.

The dr was afraid that because I have PCOS I would get GD....well so far my sugars have been fine. They even did this big A1C test that tests my blood sugar over several month's time and I scored well within the NON-diabetic range. The u/s's are also supposed to be checking to see if the baby is growing to fast, because of the GD....She has been perfectly average on each and every u/s.

Then they decide that I need to do NST's twice a week. This requires a trip to the hospital and takes about 2 hours. ---I will admit....I've been bad...I didn't go Fri. The dr put me on bedrest...so, was I supposed to drive myself to the hospital for an NST? DH couldn't take me, because of work.

Then I get a little spotting this past week and now I'm on bedrest. Ok, tell me to rest more, but let me at least go to work! I sit at a desk all day. It isn't like I'm lifting or bending. My boss called me at least 10 times this week to get help while he and his wife try to do my job.

Anyway, I'm so afraid that he is going to decide at 37 weeks that he wants to induce. Part of me wants to just give up the medical treatments and give birth at home.

[Mrs Dimples]

What a pain in the butt! If they look hard enough, sooner or later they're bound to catch SOMETHING one little time that looks worrisome, and then boom!

It's silly. I mean, you don't want to stick your head in the sand and ignore all possibility of problems, but it's like monitoring during labor: periodic checking with a fetoscope is accurate without finding problems that aren't there. Continuous monitoring isn't any more effective, but it often leads to sections for "problems" that do not, infact, exist. Since that works so well , I guess they have decided to apply that theory to our entire pregnancies. Sigh.

It's hard. I just hope everyone's babies are healthy, and I hope our moms are all happy with their births. I just make the decisions for my own family.

[MamaChel]

My OB with #1 admitted that continual fetal monitoring had absolutely NO effect on cerebral palsy rates which is why it's used to begin with. The hospitals tell you this b/c if you're tied to a bed and unable to move they have less work to do and eventually you'll capitulate to their demands (I mean requests).

With #2 my MW checked his heartrate once and then left us alone. She did check me for dilation when I requested her to but only when I asked.

At least here we are all encouraged to look into our options and pick what will work best for *us* not some blanket policy that applies to everyone. I hope everyone has a healthy baby (or babies as the case may be )

[RedOakMomma]

Originally Posted by ellie_may12

Anyway, I'm so afraid that he is going to decide at 37 weeks that he wants to induce. Part of me wants to just give up the medical treatments and give birth at home.

No one can make you get induced! Unless you agree that there's a medical need for induction, and as long as you're not heading in the range of being VERY "overdue," then I would argue strongly against induction. It's just my opinion, but instead of induction you could "bargain" with your OB and during those last weeks be sure to do what makes you (and the dr.) feel more comfortable...ultrasound for fluid levels, possibly non-stress tests, etc. Unless the baby is showing signs of stress (and make sure you know which ones are REAL signs of stress), then there's no need to induce.

It sounds like you are being overmanaged. Big-time. Next time you're pregnant, I would suggest looking for a different OB--they're not all like that. Also, if you can find a birth center or midwife you like in the area, it's not too late to switch.

Sorry they're doing this to you.

[Cedarmom]

I, for one, am glad you are over there. It makes me feel like we might have a chance to educate *someone* if there are more than one of us with a dissenting opinion to the mainstream. I admit, though, I've had to literally walk away from the computer a few times b/c of some of the posts.

The twin induction at 36 weeks I soooo don't get. You have a history of preterm labor so they are inducing you if you make it to 36 weeks???? Where's the logic there? 36 weeks is NOT full term, no matter what your wacked doctor tells you. : Sorry, had to get that one off my chest. Whew. I feel better.

I have a hard time with the whole birth board thing. I don't really fit in here b/c there is no way I'd ever do a home birth (I'm a chicken and like the idea of the OR right there if something serious goes wrong), and honestly, I kind of liked my epi last time , but I'm going to try like heck to go as natural as possible in a hospital setting this time around. However, now that I know better, I will not be induced unless there really is some life threatening reason why I should be, and most of the attitudes there on induction make my blood boil.

Oh, and Lori, I don't remember where I read it, but someone had their doctor schedule their induction after intense pressure to do so, and then just didn't show up. They can't induce you if you aren't there. I thought it was brillant.

[Mrs Dimples]

Originally Posted by Cedarmom

The twin induction at 36 weeks I soooo don't get. You have a history of preterm labor so they are inducing you if you make it to 36 weeks???? Where's the logic there? 36 weeks is NOT full term, no matter what your wacked doctor tells you. : Sorry, had to get that one off my chest. Whew. I feel better.

Yeah, but she's a nurse, so there's no point in trying to say anything.

I'm having a hard time too, with our mom who's getting crap from her family about her elective repeat C. It is her decision - while I don't agree with it, I firmly believe it is her decision to make and I think her fmaily is horrible, and her husband is a huge jerk, for saying that it's not giving birth. I can't imagine what low self-esteem she must have to be in a situaiton like that. I am for empowering women, even if I don't agree with the choices they make. But she actually said that her doc told her that a VBAC was illegal! When we told her that was incorrect information, that her doc LIED to her, she said that was what she wanted to hear anyway, she wanted a C anyway, and she was glad he lied to her to she didn't have to make a decision, it was made for her.



That, I CANNOT respect. I want to tell her to stand up for herself, but I don't know how to do it in a way that doesn't involve me saying something completely against my beliefs, or insulting her. Sounds like she's gotten the support she was looking for, so I am just keeping my mouth shut. But I am sad.

I guess I feel lucky that I only had to do this once before I realized what I missed with my first birth. And I am glad I will have the opportunity to do it again, and to have it be so much more than "getting the baby out however it has to happen". I know sometimes that's how it works out, in spite of our best laid plans, but to sell yourself short from the beginning because you just don't know that you deserve more...I just wish there was a way to get people to realize they are powerful, and deserving of the best.

[Daisie125]

Oh boy do I hear you, on everything, Rachel. I'm about to pull my hair out. (Expecially with the twin induction... I'm gonna have a heck of a time being supportive if those poor babies end up in the nicu)

I stick around on mainstream boards for one reason, if I get even one person to stop and think because of a post I've made or a decision I've posted about, then it's worth putting up with all the crap.... although I am NOT looking foward to the contant "we switched to formula" posts of the first few months.... I'm going to have a hard time with those. I looked at the March 2005 babies on those same boards, and they are almost all on formula Makes me want to cry.