Saying Mom or Dad

[tifnglen]

I was wondering do you insisted your kids to say mom or dad? Or do you let them decide. I have heard some kids call their parents by there first names.

[TeaBag]

Well, I think it depends on the family. Our children call us Mom & Dad, or versions of that. Sometimes it's "big stupid Mommy Head!" But they also know our first names and have called us by that on occasion. In fact, my dd called me Mrs. ______ last week. It took me several minutes to react because it was just so odd coming from her.

What do you want your children to call you? And more importantly, Why? I like it when my children call me Mom, becasue it's a title I love. I being their mother. But I don't want them to call me that because I think it gives me authority over them or anything of that sort. It's pride. I am a mom. I love being a mom. I love being called mom. But if they call me by another name, I don't see it as disrespect. I see it at them seeing what it sounds like.

[dharmamama]

In our house, the parents are Momma and Daddy (or Dad). I have on occasion corrected my kids when they have called me something different. I love the name Momma, I waited a long time to be a Momma, and I expect that people be called what they choose to be called.

I works both ways in our house. When Ramona wanted to be called Betsy (from the Carolyn Haywood books) or Annie (from the Magic Treehouse books), I called her Betsy/Annie.

Namaste!

[captain crunchy]

I honestly don't care what my daughter calls me as long as it isn't rude or disrespectful towards me. We are into consensual living, but it crosses my personal boundries if she were to refer to me as *bleep head* or something (which I hope never happens!)

I love being called mama but if she decided to call me mom, mommy, honey, Tara, whatever... I wouldn't mind. It just isn't something (to me) worth getting my panties in a bunch about.

Calling me something she chose in a loving manner far outweighs any satisfaction I would get out of being called the name I chose her to call me....but forcing it.

[Jish]

I prefer to be called mom, or any form of that. I love being a mother and feel honored that I have three little ones that are the only people in the world (other than the baby due in July, and dh who occasionally refers to me as "mom" also) who I will allow to call me mom. Everyone else on earth can call me by my name, but my children are special and I like that they call me mom. It isn't a respect thing, or an authority thing, but it's what I prefer. They each have nicknames, my oldest is Bugsy or Bugs, and if there ever comes a point where he would rather I not call him that, then I'll stop out of respect for his preference that I call him by his name. By that same token, I like it that they call me mom, and that's my preference and I like that they respect that.

[Stayathomemommy]

i think it makes total sence that kids would sometimes call their moms and dads by their first names. what do they hear all day from others??? my husband calls me angela and so do all my friends so when they do its just because they hear it all the time and want to try it out. they never just call me by my first name and usually revert back to mommy. i dont think its disrepectful at all when they use first names. they are so amazed by the fact that we are other things to other people. whenever we are with my mom they ask me 100 times, "grammy is your mommy??" they are just amazed by it all.

[aira]

I honestly couldn't care less if DS calls me a version of Mommy or by my first name. Right now, he's completely fascinated that I have two names. He asks me to write my name S-U-N-N-Y. "Now write your other name 'Mommy'."

I think it's cute.

He thinks it's hilarious to call me by my first name sometimes, I suspect because that's what he hears other people call me and he likes to be a part.

[sunnysideup]

I would never insist my kids call me 'mom', but I love that they do. I feel honored to be their mom. When my first was learning to talk she went through a phase of calling me by my first name. It was actually pretty cute to hear this little toddler pronounce 'samantha' . She outgrew that on her own and started calling me 'mama' again.

[johub]

I think it is simply manners that one call a person by the name they wish to be called. THis is just as true for adults as children.
However despite my best efforts to preserve "Mamma" my children have chosen to call me "mommy" but I am OK with that. I would not be OK with being called by my first name. But this isnt a power or respect issue IMO.
If my husband wanted me to call him "Bubba" I would call him bubba. And if my boss wanted me to call him "Mr Whatshisname" That is what I would call him.
To my kids I am Mom,Mamma, or Mommy. DH is Daddy or Dad.

[eminer]

I would be uncomfortable if any of my close friends or family members only wanted me to call them one specific thing. I'd wonder what was wrong. We tend to use a lot of nicknames, several apiece in fact, which are constantly morphing. People originally tended to call me Mommy when talking to my dd, but she now just as often calls me Mama, or Mooey Cow (a nickname/persona that goes way back : ). She calls me Erin when she has something very serious to say, and I love it. Those two names (i.e. mama and Erin) reflect different facets of who I am, and different facets of our relationship. I'm glad she is so aware of both.

[eminer]

This is ever so slightly OT, but dd strongly prefers to be called Grace. Whenever strangers call her "Mami" she gets extremely cross and says, afterward, "I don't know why s/he called me that when I'm not anyone's mommy!" I've explained why over and over, but Grace remains opposed to what she considers an illogical social more.

[Fuamami]

Originally Posted by johub

I think it is simply manners that one call a person by the name they wish to be called. THis is just as true for adults as children.
However despite my best efforts to preserve "Mamma" my children have chosen to call me "mommy" but I am OK with that.

That's funny, johub, because I also tried to get my dd to call me Mama. Before she could talk, I always called myself Mama, and then, one day, she started calling me Mommy. I think it was because she was better at that sequence of sounds.

Anyway, just a few days ago she started calling me Mama. I have no idea where she got it, but I was delighted.

She used to call my dh "Daddy-Nate" when she was calling him or really wanted his attention. For awhile, she attached "Nate" to anything she was yelling for, like the dogs. I was a little embarrassed, because I know she got that one from me.

Anyway, back OT, I don't care what my kids call me. In return, I get to call them all manner of silly names.

[proudmamanow]

This is an interesting thread for me because we are a two-mommy family. So far, to each other, I'm Mama and my wife is Mom, and although we eached picked those names, they are mostly for our own convenience at this point. We figure dd may come up with other names for us as she grows & that's okay.
Although I know it's also important to us that our names reflect that we are both equally her mothers and if she only called one of us by her first name that could be hard.
I'll get back to you in 2 or 3 years on this one

[tifnglen]

Thanks for you replies. Well to a pp i am not a mom yet. We are still in the planning stage. We decided on GD and since we were both spanked we have no clue how to do it. So i will be asking away lol. I just thought maybe forcing mom would contradict GD but i had to ask. Thanks

[Rivka5]

Originally Posted by proudmamanow

This is an interesting thread for me because we are a two-mommy family. So far, to each other, I'm Mama and my wife is Mom, and although we eached picked those names, they are mostly for our own convenience at this point. We figure dd may come up with other names for us as she grows & that's okay.
Although I know it's also important to us that our names reflect that we are both equally her mothers and if she only called one of us by her first name that could be hard.

My aunt and her partner have two boys. The older boy started out calling the mother who birthed him "Mommy" and his other mother "Mom." When his Mommy got pregnant again and had another baby, though, he started calling her "Jane." His other mother was still "Mom."

They understood that this was his own way of dealing with sibling rivalry - if she was going to have a baby in her arms all the time, then he was going to distance himself from her and claim the *other* mom for himself. But it still really bugged my aunt, that after carrying him and delivering him and nursing him, she got "demoted" to her first name.

[rumi]

when talking to dd i refer to dh as "nanna" [our word for dad] and that is all i do to indicate that she should call him that which she does for the most part. however she will often refer to him b name when talking to others because mabe that isw what she thinks they will understand. i do not correct her, though often the others do and i am not sure whether i should correct them.

same with me. she also ometims calls us by name and so far i think it is cute and see no reason to correct it.

[sweetfeet]

Originally Posted by Stayathomemommy

i think it makes total sence that kids would sometimes call their moms and dads by their first names. what do they hear all day from others??? my husband calls me angela and so do all my friends so when they do its just because they hear it all the time and want to try it out. they never just call me by my first name and usually revert back to mommy. i dont think its disrepectful at all when they use first names. they are so amazed by the fact that we are other things to other people. whenever we are with my mom they ask me 100 times, "grammy is your mommy??" they are just amazed by it all.

I agree. I refuse to call my dh daddy so I use his first name and so does Sophie. She had called me Meghan in the past but now I'm just mommy because I have a niece, who is Soph's best friend, named Megan and it got confusing for her. Sometimes I'm big Meghan and my niece is little Megan. I'm not too bothered by it. There are worse things that she could do, imo. She says it in a respectful tone and that, to me, is important.

It also drives my mil nuts to hear Sophie say Eric.

[Village Mama]

I would really prefer that my kids call me mama or mommy...they each seem to prefer somthing different. But no matter how much I have explained to my now 4 year old that I prefer that he calls me mama.... He still calls me Kimberley... and always has since he started talking...People always look stunned when he says it.

[mamakay]

Originally Posted by aira

I honestly couldn't care less if DS calls me a version of Mommy or by my first name. Right now, he's completely fascinated that I have two names. He asks me to write my name S-U-N-N-Y. "Now write your other name 'Mommy'."

I think it's cute.

He thinks it's hilarious to call me by my first name sometimes, I suspect because that's what he hears other people call me and he likes to be a part.

That's pretty much how my ds is. I think he gets a kick out of seeing what I'll do when he calls me by my "other name".
The whole idea of people having different names to different people is a pretty interesting concept.

[mamaduck]

For a long while our older son called us "marge and homer."