How to encourage a later waking time for the day

[LizaBear]

DS (3 1/2) wakes up for the day around 4am about 95% of the time.

It's TOO early for me to function, and I am seriously feeling the lack of quality sleep physically (a stomach-ache for months on end, daily headaches, etc). And DD has picked up on it now too - she used to sleep until about 6 - 6:30, but now wakes when her brother does.

A later bedtime doesn't help - btdt.

[AndiG]

well, its less than ideal for some but it works for us.....
we allow her to get up but refuse to get up with her. She may play quietly in our room (puzzles by the light in the hallway, we allow her to get a granola bar and milk out of the fridge when she gets up, but we keep insisting that it is still sleepy time until the clock starts with 7 ... I'm guesing you'd be happy with six?) and she can always crawl into our bed and cuddle with us but we are NOT Getting up at that hour. Period.

Its our four and a half year old who does it and she started it about a year ago.

sorry I'm not more help.
I can't get up that early and be fuctional and sane either.

[LizaBear]

I suppose we could do something like that. Maybe allow him his books to read or something ?

He is just an inherintly LOUD child - I'm afraid of his waking his sister.

[JoyofBirth]

A friend of mine had this trouble with her dd. She put a regular clock in their room. She put a piece of red tape at the 12 and on the big hand and a piece of blue tape on the 7 and on the little hand. She told her dd that it was quiet time until the blue was on the blue and the red was on the red and then showed her what that looked like. She told her that she could gets books or something quiet and play in her bed, but there was no talking until wake time. This worked out really well for her. She explained to her dd that she needed a certain amount of rest and how she could get sick and would be very tired and couldn't be as good a mommy if she didn't get her rest. She also explained that this rule did not apply to scared or sad feelings. That if she had these feelings and needed snuggles that she could come in and get her.

[Strong Mama]

Oh both my sons are morning birds..later bedtimes seem to make it worse actually. What time does your son go to bed?
But in saying that here is what I did: a morning surprise box.
It is a pain to do this but actually works for loud boys too. Go to your thrift store, yard sales, dollar store, etc..and get some cheap odds and ends toys. Even the library will do for different books. Use a cardboard box and let your ds decorate it and tell him that this is his surprise box. Every night put the toys in after he goes to bed(keep all these little toys in your room hidden somewhere) so that when he wakes in the morning he will have things to play with that are new and cool to him to keep him busy. Meanwhile also have him working on the clock thing that the lady above suggested. Tell him he can play with his surprise box toys until the clock is at the appropriate time and then he can wake up mommy, but if he is loud he will not have the surprise box the next day.
This idea sounds expensive, but if you can go and just get cheap things it really is not..things to put in there would be:
a game (like hi ho cherrios or something similiar)
flashcards
puzzles
crayons/colouring books
anything like lacing cards, etc
little toys like dinasours, animals, etc
books
the possibilities are endless

It worked for my older son really well, he was a 4am waker but then as he started to learn about the clock he started waking later and eventually would wake at 6. Now I cant get up up : LOL

My younger son is starting this trend too though..so I suppose i will be going through it again

[eclipse]

Your son sounds so much like mine. Now that he's 5, he's usually up between 5 and 5:30 AM - but seriously, sometimes he gets up in the middle of the night and stays up. The night I went into labor with DS2, I woke up at 2AM having what I thought were BH cxn, so I came out of the bedroom to go to the bathroom and putz around, and there was DS, sitting on the sofa reading a book. For a long time, 4AM was pretty normal. We have the "DO NOT BOTHER US" rule in place with him. He has food that's easy for him to get, and he can play with quiet toys until we get up. Like your son, he is inherently loud, so sometimes I have to get up to remind him to quiet down, but that's the only way we can cope. He goes to bed fairly early, but later bedtimes backfire bigtime with him. He often gets up earlier when he goes to bed later - and he NEVER gets up later.

[LizaBear]

Unfortunately, the kitchen is completely off limits to my son at this point. He has very severe food allergies that he doesn' thave the ability to self-manage yet. He does have a sippy cup of water in his room overnight.

He goes to bed between 7 and 8 pm.

[alegna]

How did you go about later bed time? Because honestly if I put my dd to bed at that time she'd be up freakishly early too. I would try a few HOURS later for weeks. And see if he doesn't adjust.

-Angela

[pammysue]

Ok, you are going to think I am crazy, but you shoud try an earlier bedtime. When kids are overtired they have a harder time sleeping and wake earlier as a result.

From Elizabeth Pantley, author of NCSS http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/con...earlytobed.htm

[Drummer's Wife]

wow 4 am is really early! My kids stay up late and sleep in late but I can see how that wouldn't work for other families. We've just always been on a differnt schedule so it has worked to let them stay up until they are tired and then they tend to sleep until they wake up on their own.

My 2 yr old has woken up at 5 am a few times but I have him lay down with me or put him back in his room and he's always fell back asleep cause something woke him up but he really hadn't gotten enough rest yet.

Sorry I don't have much advice but I hope he starts sleeping later for you

[Denny]

I agree with pammysue, if my Ds goes to bed late and is overtired he is up before the birds, always!
My 3 1/2 yo son has wanted to party at those hours and I just refuse to start our day before the day has dawned. I say it is not time to get up as it is still dark and he has choice to hang out with only the night light or come snuggle in and go back to sleep.
It must be hard for you, esspecially if he has a younger sister that might wake and want to start the day at 4am too. Perhaps just refuse to get the morning routine started that early and he'll get bored and go back to sleep??
Feel for you.

Denny

[LizaBear]

I should have mentioned in my original post.

One of our other issues comes from having a DH who works on a rotating shift. 2 weeks he has to be up at 5am to prepare for work, then 2 weeks he works an afternoon shift, repeat ad naseum.

SO - the kids are used to hearing Daddy getting up, lights going on, etc at 5am. How 5 became 4, I'm not sure.

[RubyWild]

Strange, but true story. My Dd wasn't sleeping long enough at night (almost 3 years old and only sleeping 8 hours a night) and a neurologist friend told us to give her a longer nap during the day and then she'll sleep longer and better at night. It was true.

So, if your son isn't napping, I'd suggest an earlier bedtime and see what happens. My neurologist friend explained why it works this way, but I can't remember now what she said.

[4evermom]

My ds seems to only be able to sleep 9 hours at a go, so he still takes a 2-3 hour nap. Sometimes he gets restless towards morning. We co-sleep and just snuggle or nurse with minimal talking/interacting, kind of like the no talking rule w/o stating it as such (if told to not talk, ds would most assuredly start shouting ). I agree with the others that say children who are getting enough sleep, sleep more soundly. I solve that by encouraging a nap rather than an early bedtime, because ds sleeps less soundly w/o the nap. Because we co-sleep, ds knows he is not missing out on anything, like daddy time (he actually sits up and checks to make sure we are both there), so he is more likely to go back to sleep. Ds has sleep inertia (wakes up disoriented) and has always had a strong need for physical contact (couldn't put him down as an infant, wakes up if he can't feel me, etc) so I always lie down with him for naps and if I am lucky, I get a nap myself or I just read if I'm not tired. I know that would be harder or impossible to do for you having 2 children who likely have different sleep schedules, but sometimes mamas don't prioritize their sleep needs, prefering to have some awake child-free time to get stuff done. I also go to bed when ds does. Getting enough sleep is higher on my list than housework or personal time since it effects the quality of my life so strongly. Smilies are from ds

[LizaBear]

Originally Posted by RubyWild

Strange, but true story. My Dd wasn't sleeping long enough at night (almost 3 years old and only sleeping 8 hours a night) and a neurologist friend told us to give her a longer nap during the day and then she'll sleep longer and better at night. It was true.

So, if your son isn't napping, I'd suggest an earlier bedtime and see what happens. My neurologist friend explained why it works this way, but I can't remember now what she said.

He naps for about 2 horus most days.

[RubyWild]

Maybe it's time to give up the naps. My Dd was 3.5 when I started teaching a class in the afternoons and she no longer could get her nap in. It was rough at first (I missed the naps), but she did start sleeping more at night.

[LizaBear]

He had given up naps, but has started taking them again. It didn't make a difference at all to how late he slept.

[AndiG]

ok, so if he has severe food allergies and the kitchen is off limits, what about putting out a snack in a designated area in your room near the toys and puzzles you might be enouraging him to use?
My kids aren't going through the fridge picking stuff, they get a specific cup off a specific shelf and they get a granola bar that is left out on the counter....

I can understand the early hours their dad keeps having some impact as well. .. a friend of ours has a sheep farmer dh who gets up at 5 for a large part of the year.... and well... her kids get up REALLY early compared to mine. They are often up for the day at 530.

good luck!

[LizaBear]

That could work - as long as the snack is not cat appealing Darn thing.

[Slabobbin]

Are you a tv watching family?