Oh God, I wanted to cry reading this. I am so sorry for your sweet little girl, and for you. I see that you are pregnant, and your dh is deployed too.......I can't imagine being in your situation right now. Huge hugs to you.
I wanted to say, like everyone else, that I am so impressed with you as a mama. You listened to your intuition and did everything absolutely right. I think it will be important for both you AND her to know in the future, that this is not your faults. HE is 100% in the wrong.
The most important thing I think will be not to let it define her. Always, always it should be emphasized that there was something wrong with this boy, not her. You tell her that she is good, wonderful and amazing, always.
Please take care of yourself, mama.