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Depressed over messy, cluttered, ugly house!! Help? - Page 5

post #81 of 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by oceanbaby
I was wondering if someone could comment on the biggest problem I have with decluttering - sentimental value.
i found that giving a BIG item of HUGE sentimental value to goodwill- my deceased mother's beloved mink coat- i found myself able to get rid of 'lesser' items. once i took that major leap, i am able to say, 'yeah? the mink coat is gone, & i haven't self-destructed or forgotten my mother.' other things pale in comparison & the value of clutter-free spaces becomes more & more apparent & important each day.

(i am a little leery of people characterizing themselves as 'lazy' over this. it isn't- people living in clutter work ten times harder than those who live without. it isn't just a matter of will, but in learning new ways of living, forging new neural paths in one's brain. A.D.D. is difficult enough to deal with without anyone, even ourselves, painting us as 'lazy'. the world will be happy enough to do that for us.)
post #82 of 255
double post (and just my luck, you quoted the one before i corrected 'neuron', greenie ) but thanks. back atcha.
post #83 of 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by TigerTail
(i am a little leery of people characterizing themselves as 'lazy' over this. it isn't- people living in clutter work ten times harder than those who live without. it isn't just a matter of will, but in learning new ways of living, forging new neuron paths in one's brain. A.D.D. is difficult enough to deal with without anyone, even ourselves, painting us as 'lazy'. the world will be happy enough to do that for us.)
Tigertail, you're my new hero. You've said some very useful and important stuff here.
post #84 of 255
You know what's interesting about beating myself up about having a house like this, calling myself lazy, a loser, etc., is that I never think that about anyone else. I've never walked into any else's messy house and thought "gee, they're so lazy." But you're very right about trying to change that language with regard to how we speak to even ourselves, because it does just make me that less inclined to do anything. I highly recommend the book "Organizing from the Inside Out." It really addresses this kind of stuff in a way that other books I read didn't.

I have been rereading this thread, and am slowly (very slowly) making changes.
post #85 of 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamao'two
No advice but I can commiserate.
LOL! I am sooooo there...
post #86 of 255
What do we do? Just begin to give stuff away? I'm afraid...
post #87 of 255

so timely

This thread is awesome and so well timed for me. We are planning on moving cross-country next year. We are planning on selling our house this summer and moving in with my parents to save $$ for a few months. this means that the big stuff goes into storage, we pack a few boxes of stuff we need to live, and the rest has to go!! This is so hard for me. My dad is a total packrat - my dd won't have to bring any toys when we move it cause all my old toys are still there, lol!
I just have such a hard time, especially with clothes. I don't really wear all that much anymore, especially since I am no longer in the "professional" world. I have so many clothes for work, and about 3 sizes of clothes that I might need again "someday." It's just so hard for me to let go of this STUFF. I know it needs to go, but getting started is so difficult.
Thanks for the inspiration all you brave mamas. Looks like I have some boxes to pack tomorrow!
post #88 of 255
yesterday all my GOOD nursing dresses (the motherwear, milk & wild honey, etc) went to goodwill! i had been postponing taking them to consignment long enough. a few bucks would've been nice, but they are deductible (thank god 'it's deductible' the tax program uses guides from eBay , you know what that stuff goes for) & so a frugal mama will have a better chance at scamming some quality nursing clothes.

it is worth it to have them out of my closet, sitting there going out of style.

yes, girlie l, just start giving it away. once you start you will be amazed at how freeing it is. the feng shui of all that open space- once you get used to it, you'll love it.

i also got rid of all the cute overalls we've got- ds#2 has been crying when i ask him to wear them, but 'they're good, they're cute', blah blah. i finally realized that even though they fit, he hates them, i'm not going to 'make' him wear them when he has alternatives, & why am i hanging on to them when someone else could have good use from them? (someone like my boy #1, that loves overalls .)
post #89 of 255
I know this is just an excuse, and I'm lazy but....I really hate cleaning alone. When my DH gets home, I clean. It's very hard when you have a 10 month old pulling on your pant leg! So I usually wait until DH comes home, and I give him a choice: you clean or watch the baby....usually he watches the baby but there are days when he'll clean. Still though, the house is a mess.

I grew up in a NASTY house. Dog and cat poop everywhere, infested with ants, and fleas. It was bad. I promised myself I would never let it get that bad, but I don't feel like I'm doing much better. My problem is that I am just plain lazy. I will be in a cleaning mood about one every 2 weeks. And I clean alot for that day. but then 2 weeks of mess accumulates before I clean again.

I guess I am waiting for something to magically make me want to clean everyday. That ain't gonna happen right?

I can generally keep a house clean, but cleaning a messy house, no way. Good thing we're moving in 2 days!
post #90 of 255
I don't know if anyone addressed this yet, haven't read through the whole thread, but it would be depressing for me to sleep in the living room. Do you have a dining room or dining area that you could partition off to make a new bedroom? We did this in a small house and got an extra 7x10 foot small bedroom out of it. You can put up a bookshelf all the way across is you are renting, that way you don't have to damage the walls.
post #91 of 255
WOW I have just sat here and read this entire thread, what a wonderful inspiration you all are to me Some how I don't feel so alone in all of this unorganised excess of stuff.

My biggest problem is walking into a room all inspired and just looking blankly at everything, I pick something up and think "Where the heck does this go?" I feel like I'm walking round in circles just relocating stuff into a different room, clearing up all day yet getting absolutely nowhere - except worn out and confused as to why there is still so much stuff everywhere. After reading all the marvellous ideas here I think I need to allocate a place for all of our ESSENTIAL items first, then onto the things we probably don't need at all. I know this is going to be a hard journey letting go of things, but honestly I need to do this for my sanity's sake.

Thankyou all so much for contributing to this thread, I have certainly learnt a lot here especially a whole heap of encouragement


post #92 of 255
Welcome to TeresaWdeG and Rhogan!
That's a great idea, Teresa- it is depressing to have to combine space/use that way!
I know what you mean Rhogan, we are still getting out from under the clutter around here! I still keep something to catch give-aways on both floors of our house. A cardboard box or a big strong plastic shopping bag.
People keep dropping things off for the baby (they seem to assume that since he's a boy, we need a whole new set of everything because he can't use our daughter's stuff ) so I'm culling unecessary stuff from the piles on a daily basis.
Another big spacehog issue here is books. My goal is to cull them until what we have fits on our shelves. (This means going from two big pickup loads to about one load's worth) Once you get started, it feels so good! The satisfaction that comes from hauling stuff away helps me move my line a little further each day. Turning clutter into open, neat space feels soooo good.
post #93 of 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhogan
After reading all the marvellous ideas here I think I need to allocate a place for all of our ESSENTIAL items first, then onto the things we probably don't need at all.

nak

That's a really good point you highlighted. I've been trying to start small, like picking a place and putting dd's shoes there each time she takes them off. I have to announce/reinforce it for us all but after a while it sticks.

I'm proud that i haven;'t lost my keys for a long time now, since I put one of those little stick up hooks on the inside of a kitchen cabinet door and put them there each time.
post #94 of 255
I love this thread......I'm in the same boat....a little more room in our house, but it is full of junk.. I'd rather be on mdc than cleaning!
post #95 of 255
Wow, there are others like us! I am inspired to get off my butt. Tomorrow morning I will start! My son is sleeping/nursing on me now! Im gonna sub. We are moving from a 750 sf mobile home to a 24 ft camper w/ screen porch for the summer to do repairs and put this on the market. this is gonna be hard. but we know for us, and all our junk we will force ourselves to go through our crap to show the mobile when the repairs are done...or so my theory goes!
post #96 of 255
Wow...this is an awesome thread. There are several similar threads going on right now it seems. It's such a great topic that most of us deal with.

I have done the hard stuff and have now finally gotten to a pretty minimal base of "stuff". But now that I've done it, I'm addicted to it and I keep going back and getting rid of more stuff! I just laugh at myself...as I find that I need less and less that I need to live happily. And just a little while ago and would go out and buy more "stuff" to bring home just because I was bored! Duh!

This is been a huge turn for us. So exhilerating and exciting. To walk into a clean home makes me feel instantly joyful, accomplished, and peaceful. Thannks so much to all of those on MDC who have inspired me. I am so grateful!!
post #97 of 255
Delight--may we all be struck with the same "addiction!"
post #98 of 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by TigerTail
i also got rid of all the cute overalls we've got- ds#2 has been crying when i ask him to wear them, but 'they're good, they're cute', blah blah. i finally realized that even though they fit, he hates them, i'm not going to 'make' him wear them when he has alternatives, & why am i hanging on to them when someone else could have good use from them? (someone like my boy #1, that loves overalls .)
I hear you! It took me years to figure out that ds hates polo/golf shirts. He loves t shirts but when the tshirt has a button placket he hates the buttons on his chest. I always thought, but they look nice at dressier events, *I* think they're comfortable etc...now, when I get them in hand me downs, on they go to charity or a friend immediately.
post #99 of 255
Subbing.

Thanks for the inspiration everyone! The MDC rocks!
post #100 of 255
I'm subbing too.
Happy Mother's Day everyone!
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