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Poly Families - Page 38

post #741 of 1038
yeah I found one that lives just down the street from us, and they even have kids the same age group as mine, and they're totally like-minded





I know, you were looking for suggestions. Um... some people post on craigslist, and there's loads of adult meet up websites for that kind of thing.
post #742 of 1038
We're out to immediate family, due to the little one's unexpected (unplanned) arrival. My family and girlfriend's family hate the idea of polyamory - boyfriend's family, for the most part, has been surprisingly accepting. Some friends know. Most people in our circle of friends already knew and accepted poly, anyway.

When we're around that particular group of friends, we're openly affectionate with each other. Out in public, we're careful - and get odd looks when we aren't so careful.

We met through an adult-ish website/group.

And since it's been a while - I gave birth! The couple and my mom were there with me (and didn't kill each other, wonder of wonders). It was a bumpy labor and didn't quite go as I would have liked but it could have been a lot worse. Asher was born on his due date (7/21) at 2:34 AM, 6 lbs., 5 oz., and 20 inches long. And he's being a fussbudgit, so I'll end this post here.
post #743 of 1038
serenekitten congratulations on your new little one! How exciting that must be for all of you!!
post #744 of 1038
congrats SK!!!!!
post #745 of 1038
Aw, congrats SK! : New babies are fun... and yet, I feel not even a twinge. I'm so done.

So I had an interesting twinge last week. A friend of mine from college asked about THRH and the relationship and such, so I explained. She said she thought she'd be jealous, and I said that we were odd and worked a little differently... but it occurred to me at that point that *I* was "the other woman" as THRH had his other girlfriend before he met me. It kind of made me pause because I don't feel like "the other woman" at all... but in a sense it's certainly true. The twinge came when I told THRH about this moment; *He* paused and looked at me oddly, and was clearly upset by it. Apparently he doesn't think of me as "the other woman" either, and the thought that I might (in any context) was distressing to him. At the time, I chalked it up to our altered states (both of us had just spent several hours being horribly ill) but now I'm wondering about it all. Am I "the other woman?" Is she? Does there need to be an "other" in a relationship like this?

I'll probably fire off an email and ask him about it tonight... I might wait until I see him in person again to bring it up (he prefers conversation to email). I was curious as to what you thought?
post #746 of 1038
eilonwy, I think, in the sense of "other woman" as the interloper or mistress in a mongamous relationship, the term doesn't apply. in an equal poly r'ship, there is no "other" woman. but from a linguistic POV, if one of you isn't present in the conversation, then she would be the other woman. or other partner, so have you. that could be true for all 3 of you as well, and IMO, from a poly perspective, it doesn't carry the connotations of the "other woman" as most people would see it.

clear as mud?
post #747 of 1038
Great news article about being Poly http://www.newsweek.com/id/209164?digg=1
post #748 of 1038
wow mainstream coverage, and its not actually *that* bad--huh??
post #749 of 1038
It's really decent! I'm looking forward to reading about that study they mentioned, the one following children of poly parents.
post #750 of 1038
yeah I thought it was really good. I liked the video!
post #751 of 1038
yeah, great article I didn't watch the video coz dp and dd are still sleeping, but it's pretty unbiased, IMO. not edited so well but that must be the writer in me coming out
post #752 of 1038
Quote:
Originally Posted by serenekitten View Post
We're out to immediate family, due to the little one's unexpected (unplanned) arrival. My family and girlfriend's family hate the idea of polyamory - boyfriend's family, for the most part, has been surprisingly accepting. Some friends know. Most people in our circle of friends already knew and accepted poly, anyway.

When we're around that particular group of friends, we're openly affectionate with each other. Out in public, we're careful - and get odd looks when we aren't so careful.

We met through an adult-ish website/group.

And since it's been a while - I gave birth! The couple and my mom were there with me (and didn't kill each other, wonder of wonders). It was a bumpy labor and didn't quite go as I would have liked but it could have been a lot worse. Asher was born on his due date (7/21) at 2:34 AM, 6 lbs., 5 oz., and 20 inches long. And he's being a fussbudgit, so I'll end this post here.
Congrats!!! I can't wait to hear about it :
post #753 of 1038
Quote:
Originally Posted by zahirakids View Post
Great news article about being Poly http://www.newsweek.com/id/209164?digg=1
2 of my family members are in the slideshow!

Oops! One is in the slideshow. The other took the pic. DH is the fella in the PolyNYC pic with a straw fedora.


And I just got a funny "juxtaposition of thread titles" moment:
"seeking other wives of husbands who are gone A LOT for work..."
right above the listing for this thread.

post #754 of 1038
Quote:
Originally Posted by EviesMom View Post
And I just got a funny "juxtaposition of thread titles" moment:
"seeking other wives of husbands who are gone A LOT for work..."
right above the listing for this thread.


classic!
post #755 of 1038
I loved the Newsweek article. I think I first spotted it here, then it popped up on a couple other poly-friendly lists I'm a member of (yet somehow it missed the actual Poly Maine group... *fixes*).

3 weeks in, and all the fears I'd had while poly & pregnant haven't mattered now that I'm poly & postpartum. I think the couple and my mother developed a sort of shaky, temporary truce while I was in labor. Heck, once I was in labor, I didn't much care if they were playing nice or not. I'm sort of waiting for the bottom to fall out on that. It would be nice if it would hold, but I'm not expecting miracles. Mom is just pleased with being a grandmother, and of course worries incessantly about me and the baby. The couple are adjusting to being parents, too, but they are lacking patience with each other. Their anniversary is this week, and I'm hoping they'll take time out for themselves.

Me? I'm doing a lot better emotionally and physically than I expected. Baby and I have rough times and not-as-rough times, so I've had some baby blues. But I haven't had the full-blown depression I'd been fearing the entire pregnancy. My weight loss has gone a lot quicker than I expected, so I'm shifting my focus to eating and living healthier. What I didn't expect (silly me) was how difficult living alone and apart from the couple would be. I don't have anyone else to hand the baby off to when I need a moment. That, and it's just lonely. I love the kiddo and my cats, but it's just not the same, ya know?

Hope everyone is doing well!
post #756 of 1038
that's great news SK
sorry you're feeling lonely. that can be really hard. I can't remember; is there any way you could live together/ closer to each other?
post #757 of 1038
I've been trying to get my own apartment, but no such luck, yet. We're working toward moving in together, eventually. Unfortunately, they had their last house foreclosed on about two years ago, and I have no/bad credit of my own, so that's a big hitch in things. Right now, they live with his parents and I go and stay with them for a few days at a time. I'd move in altogether, but I need to do something about my two cats (can't bring them with me) and the MIL-in-spirit is already driving me nuts. DS was four days old and I was already catching flack about holding him "too much." Let's just say it hasn't gotten better.
post #758 of 1038
ugh. hope things turn around for you
post #759 of 1038
Wow... maybe you guys could all get an apartment together? Like a 3bdrm?

Anyway: NEWS! I am dating a man. I have not done this since my son was in my belly. It's a little scary! I met met him while he was delivering a mattress to my home about a month ago. lol My dp is very supportive about it. She hasn't met him yet, but we may all be watching a movie together at my place tomorrow night. Wow! It'll be our second date. heehee.
post #760 of 1038
that's good news erthemama. hope it goes well.
and... you're dating the delivery man? I thought that only happened in stereotypes LOL
I shouldn't talk. I once dated a guy I met when he was processing my application at the welfare office he actually edited my application slightly so I got more money
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