My first birth was in a different city. I couldn't afford a homebirth at the time so I had an amazing midwife provide labour support. The only thing that could have made my birth better was if I had been able to stay home the entire time (getting to that darn hospital was hard with contractions a minute apart! It took us forever to get there!). My midwife was amazing in her knowledge not only of birth but of herbs and other remedies good for use in pregnancy and labour. During labour she gave me rescue remedy when she thought I needed it, some other herbs (my memory is failing me right now as this was 8 years ago), arnica after birth, etc., etc. I LOVED that she was knowledgable in this area and could trust her for these remedies during labour.
I can't have this midwife for this birth as she moved out of the country shortly after my birth and I have moved to a different city. In fact, I have only one midwife to choose from. Thus, my choices are, take the only midwife available, birth in the hospital, or do an unassisted birth. Unassisted birth has been eliminated from my choices due to the fact that I am not mentally prepared for it and don't have time to get prepared (we are building a new house right now and will be spending time with the construction, packing, moving etc. and moving less than a month before baby is due). As for hospital birth, well I just don't see the purpose of getting up to go there when I can stay in the comfort of my own home.
So, I am taking the homebirth with my only choice of midwife. Now, I like her, really I do. She is laid back, calm, knows her stuff, has lots of stories about previous births....but she's not my old midwife.
She seems more medically oriented than my last midwife. For example, I called her about a minor problem I was having and hoped she have some suggestions as to a safe herb or remedy that I could take. She didn't have much advice other than some common sense things (like make sure you eat, etc.) and then told me about a prescription medication in case it got bad. Not what I wanted to hear at all.
I ended up heading to the homeopath and picking up a remedy which resolved my issue in a day or two. I didn't need prescription meds and even if I did, I'd likely have tried every natural remedy under the sun before I resorted to meds. So, anyway, now I have no idea what I'll do during my birth. It looks like I'll have to do all of the research on herbs/remedies during labour on my own. I can talk to a naturopath and homeopath beforehand and get advice so I can make my own little stash in advance. What I am most worried about is during labour. My previous midwife said I needed very little labour support but she watched me carefully and knew if I needed rescue remedy or anything else. I wouldn't have known on my own because I was in such a zone that the world could have blown up around me and I would never have known.
I suppose DH could somewhat take on this role, but never having seen, let alone attended a birth, he's not going to know when it might be a good idea to try a herb to speed up/slow down contractions, etc. And with all we have going on in the next several months, it's unlikely we can get him that training in time.
Likely I am being a big baby, but I guess I was hoping for the same type of midwife for this birth and that I would take a step forward with being able to be at home. Now it seems like I get the home part, but I have to sacrifice some other aspects of my care (so a step forward and some steps back). So, now I'm feeling sorry for myself and all bummed out! Any ideas or advice?
I can't have this midwife for this birth as she moved out of the country shortly after my birth and I have moved to a different city. In fact, I have only one midwife to choose from. Thus, my choices are, take the only midwife available, birth in the hospital, or do an unassisted birth. Unassisted birth has been eliminated from my choices due to the fact that I am not mentally prepared for it and don't have time to get prepared (we are building a new house right now and will be spending time with the construction, packing, moving etc. and moving less than a month before baby is due). As for hospital birth, well I just don't see the purpose of getting up to go there when I can stay in the comfort of my own home.
So, I am taking the homebirth with my only choice of midwife. Now, I like her, really I do. She is laid back, calm, knows her stuff, has lots of stories about previous births....but she's not my old midwife.
She seems more medically oriented than my last midwife. For example, I called her about a minor problem I was having and hoped she have some suggestions as to a safe herb or remedy that I could take. She didn't have much advice other than some common sense things (like make sure you eat, etc.) and then told me about a prescription medication in case it got bad. Not what I wanted to hear at all.I ended up heading to the homeopath and picking up a remedy which resolved my issue in a day or two. I didn't need prescription meds and even if I did, I'd likely have tried every natural remedy under the sun before I resorted to meds. So, anyway, now I have no idea what I'll do during my birth. It looks like I'll have to do all of the research on herbs/remedies during labour on my own. I can talk to a naturopath and homeopath beforehand and get advice so I can make my own little stash in advance. What I am most worried about is during labour. My previous midwife said I needed very little labour support but she watched me carefully and knew if I needed rescue remedy or anything else. I wouldn't have known on my own because I was in such a zone that the world could have blown up around me and I would never have known.
I suppose DH could somewhat take on this role, but never having seen, let alone attended a birth, he's not going to know when it might be a good idea to try a herb to speed up/slow down contractions, etc. And with all we have going on in the next several months, it's unlikely we can get him that training in time.
Likely I am being a big baby, but I guess I was hoping for the same type of midwife for this birth and that I would take a step forward with being able to be at home. Now it seems like I get the home part, but I have to sacrifice some other aspects of my care (so a step forward and some steps back). So, now I'm feeling sorry for myself and all bummed out! Any ideas or advice?
I had the same midwife for my first two births and she has since moved. I now have another midwife that I like, but I was hoping to feel more comfortable with her right away. I guess it will just take time. It is hard starting over. I just don' t want to be in this place right now of establishing a new relationship. I just want to focus on baby and my two kiddos. I do find myself comparing both mw. I have heard this mw is a great labor support which was something I wish former MW would have been more for me, since I wanted that. My former MW was such a great listener and good evaluater. I tottally felt confident in her care. New MW is a little overly confident and quick to make judgements, so not as thorough. At least, I am not feeling her thoroghness. Does that make sense? I find I am doing alot more self learning, but I think part of that is having been around the block and a little more sober about birth. There is safety in a multitude of counselors (Proverbs) and I don't want to put mine and my babies health in just one persons hands well except Gods
I even have a obgyn now that I have mainly for second opinions and so I won't be given such a hard time in the event of transport and have another member on my birth team instead of another stranger (at night a one in six chance she would actually deliver me, you get whoevers on call) Just wanted you to know your not alone. Sending you a big (((hug))).
