'Fess up - what children's books make you groan? - Page 6

[ChrisCountryGirl]

There's a lot of children's books I don't like....I definitely hate the books that has characters from a movie or television show especially Disney movies.

[Apryl Srissa]

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who doesn't like Dr Suess! People always look at me like I'm nuts, but I've already put oldest dh (he's almost 10) in charge of all Suess reading to the younger two, I just can't do it

I also found Goodnight Moon annoying. I do have to admit a soft spot for Guess How Much I Love You. Don't particularly like it, but have mushy feelings as it was my oldest's fave forever.

My two yr old has a fav called Sleepy Dog. Overall cute, but when the dog wakes up, it says turn off the moon, turn on the sun, (cuz the moon is only at night?) and turn off the clock, turn on the light. Why turn on the light in the sub bright room? I skip the light part completely.

He likes the Pooh books too. But the Disney 'tell the movie' books are a waste. We don't buy them, but my oldest has bought two over the years. Still has them, swears he likes them, but never see them off the shelf.

[boatbaby]

Originally Posted by loraxc

Speaking of lines like "blow me," we have had a hard time reading our beautifully illustrated copy of "The Owl and the Pussycat" with a straight face. "Oh lovely pussy....oh pussy, my love....what a beautiful pussy you are, you are!"

I have recited that story to DS EVERY night and EVERY nap time since BIRTH (we have the book but I have it memorized) and I have to admit although I ADORE the story and so does DS -- I add an extra "cat" everytime there is a lone "pussy". Makes it easier for me to get through and then I don't have to worry about him pointing at a friend's house and yelling "PUSSY!" when he sees their cat next to their daughter

[Throkmorton]

I thought of one more book that makes me groan.
The book "Dealing with your Parent's Divorce" that was sent in a box of stuff to DS from FIL.:
Dh and I are happily married, thankyouverymuch. It went in the trash, while I was in a hormonal rage.

[BlueStateMama]

Agreed with PP about I love you forever ...dude, if your mom is coming over to your house with a ladder on her car so she can crawl in your marital window and rock you to sleep...you got bigger problems than your taxes are late or the dog needs walkies. Big, big problems.

HUGE ditto...and TWO people have given that book to me as a baby present...it's a creepy book...that poor wife in the story!

ITA with the comments on Runaway Bunny too...stalkerish.

[Charles Baudelaire]

Originally Posted by zinemama

I really don't get the Carl disapproval. I mean, do we really suppose that the scenario in the Carl books is meant to be real? It's a story!

In an ideal world, I would love to leave my baby in the care of a large, obviously competent, cuddly, dog babysitter while I go enjoy tea and adult conversation in the park.

I can't stand the Carl books because he's a Rottweiler.

I imagine that "Good Dog, Carl," is being said right before he tears into an unsuspecting two-year-old.

[mollyeilis]

You know, it's nice to see this thread. I've been accused by my "do whatever everyone else is doing" friends of overthinking things.

But you know, I still remember books read to me as a child, and in fact one of my phobias (the only nonsensical one) is directly due to one of those books (I'm afraid of butterflies b/c of a Golden Book?I think showing a ton of butterflies all sort of coming at the reader), and I also remember a terrified puppy's face that scared me in another?same? book.

I don't want that sort of thing for E, and I also don't want to have to re-teach things (it's a Blue's Clues episode that finally got through to me, just the other day, what the earth is doing to make it day and night, and I was a "gifted" student for goshsakes!) that he is initially taught wrong, by poorly chosen books.


I also have a hard time reading books that use the other word for "cat". And I shy away from skipping or changing words, mainly because I read incredibly early (picked up a newspaper and read it aloud at 2, nearly causing my mom to faint) and I don't want to confuse Eamon in case he reads early too (it's not being encouraged, though).

[Charles Baudelaire]

Originally Posted by ceilydhmama

Ditto Ditto!!!! My 4 year old speaks MUCH better than Junie B. The stories do make us giggle though

I actually got in a big pissy fight about Junie B. Jones, so at the risk of starting yet another one, I'll say that I find the books encourage unethical behavior and leave it at that.

Seriously, I'd rather have my kid watch Brokeback Mountain than read a Junie B. Jones book.

[Charles Baudelaire]

Hey, get a load of this book -- it's one of those Little Golden Books.

Look inside here and here too.

Okay, now look at this very, very funny parody. Same illustrations -- creepy eyes and all -- and very different text.

Little Golden Book About Zogg

[riversong]

Originally Posted by Throkmorton

I thought of one more book that makes me groan.
The book "Dealing with your Parent's Divorce" that was sent in a box of stuff to DS from FIL.:
Dh and I are happily married, thankyouverymuch. It went in the trash, while I was in a hormonal rage.

That is hilarious! I am actually LOL!

[riversong]

The Disney books are bad enough, but there are also tons of books based on worthless cartoons and toys like Sponge Bob, Strawberry Shortcake, Cabbage Patch Kids and much more. Ugh, these are ubiquitous in the Scholastic book club catalogs that kids get at school.

[lilyka]

Originally Posted by bean0322

Like you, the Clifford and Thomas books. Also, the Arthur books. My oldest son went on a huge Arthur binge and I was miserable. What else? Never liked Goodnight Moon.

didn't read all the posts but was wondernig about thomas and author - which bother you - the original or the ones born out of the marketing of the TV shows etc or both.

I think the original Thomas is nice but hate the newer stuff. The original Arthur books are better but I still am not fan. i like the original pooh buthate the disney stuff.

books that I dislike:
the Giving tre
I love you forever
the rainbow fish
word bird books
anything that is a spin off of TV or movies.

[flyingspaghettimama]

Originally Posted by Charles Baudelaire

Okay, now look at this very, very funny parody. Same illustrations -- creepy eyes and all -- and very different text.

Little Golden Book About Zogg

Weelll, I was trying to nak...but my baby doesn't like the milkshake.

Too, too funny!

[ceilydhmama]

I find it so interesting how many hate "Love you forever" This book kills me - I sniffle through it and love it. Munsch is so over the top in *all* his books - the mother and the ladder thing have never struck me as odd. Heck, in "Smelly Socks" the girl wears those things for weeks and weeks and kills off most of the local wildlife in the process. The man likes hyperbole...

And I'm going to see him at the Childrens Festival - Yee Haa!!

For hate books though - some of those whingy Angelina books drive me bonkers. And dd LOVES "What to Expect When You go to the Doctor" - I would like to burn it.

I did ban the Rainbow fish - now THAT is creepy. Who would give away their body parts just because someone else wants them and is jealous - ack!

[loraxc]

Today ds was happily playing so I put some in a bag, well ds knew something was up, came over and pulled out Richard Scarry's Mother Goose and made me read it to him. Yuck, there's a rhyme in there about having a wife who cooks and cleans and brings him ale while he sits around.

We have this book. I SO skip that one, along with anything about people being hit and animals fighting.

I forgot Curious George. Really hate that one. So colonialist-creepy.

I maintain that I was warped forever by a collection of Hans Christian Anderson stories, unaltered and faithfully translated, that we had when I was a girl. SO sad and creepy, and every single inanimate object has feelings. To this day I cannot throw away the Christmas tree without feeling terrible.

Also, the cartoon of the "Lorax" made me cry hysterically when I was little. As did Charlotte's Web. I love both books, but I took them too personally, I guess...

[mamato2sweeties]

I'm with you on "No, David".

Although my ds and I are devoted train fans, Thomas puts me to sleep everytime.

But the ones I find really troubling are the children's books with spelling and grammar errors!! My mom gave my dd a version of "Peter Rabbit", which used the word "presently" at least 7 times in the short story. But even better was the sentence that included "presently" and currently". How dare they publish a book that has not been properly edited!??

[bu's mama]

Originally Posted by nonnymoose

The Runaway Bunny:
"If you become the wind and blow me, I'll..."
Yeah. I skip the "blow me" part.

OK, I'm just glad to know that I'm not the only one who cringes at that part.

[miasmommy]

Interesting thread!

The only book that DD has that I truly hate is the "Old Lady that Swallowed the Fly"... really creepy... perhaps she'll die?... and it shows her eating a "cat sandwich"... UGH!

I don't really mind Dr. Seuss books except they are way too long!

miasmommy

[PancakeGoddess]

I don't think there's anything wrong with reading thsoe annoying books to your kids if they request them, but I've just never been willing to keep books around if I hate reading them. If there were a more limited number of books in the world, I'd concede, but there are SO MANY AWESOME books in the library that I just am not willing to sit through crap.

My kids always manage to agree on lots of books, and although I don't like repeating any book, I will repeat a decent book a million times. An annoying book, otoh, I will avoid, and I'd rather look forward to reading with them.

Same goes for read alouds with the big kids. They are free to read annoying books to themselves. Mean mean mommy.

[spinspin]

Books to put on a HIGH SHELF... Richard Scarry!

I just read the posts on this topic and found them really quite intelligent... better reading than anything on Urban Baby. Anyway, I hate my 2.9yo son's Richard Scarry books "Cars and Trucks and Things that Go" and "Busy Busy Town." Sure, the pickle truck is sort of funny... but the "plot" is so pointless, and the pages are so busy and hard to look at. Bleh.
I'm with everybody who also hates the Ber. Bears and other cheesy series books. Random House should be smacked one time for EVERY Thomas book sold-- they are complete drek. Would it be SO hard to write a decent story or two about the little trendy train?
I'm also not wild about-- controversially-- the Olivia books. They are so clever and beautiful to look at, but they use so much irony. I think little kids deserve more honesty on the page.
Odd that so many people raise their hands about hating Good Night Moon. I think that book is so beautiful and lilting. I was just explaining to my toddler "do you know HOW we should tell your baby brother to stop screaming? Don't scream yourself... tell him just like 'the quiet old lady who is whispering hush' in Night Night Moon..." He knew just what I meant!