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'Fess up - what children's books make you groan? - Page 2

post #21 of 169
Originally Posted by LadyBug & BabyBug
I know it is also a nursery rhyme, but for Christmas DS got the book version of "There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly". DH and I think it's a bit morbid and it has been put away until I remember to get rid if it.

"I don't know why she swallowed the fly, perhaps she'll die."
I wanted to use that book when I was teaching, because the kids in my class loved repetition, and books like that let even the less verbal ones learn to fill in some of the words (they all had autism), but I couldn't stand the cheery "perhaps she'll die" aspect. So I made my own with clip art (I put the pictures at the end of each line, so it was also good for nonreaders), and changed the words to "...I don't know why she swallowed the fly. Oh me, oh my!" and then it ended with "I know an old lady who swallowed a horse. She got sick, of course." It was a lot less disturbing, and now ds loves it.
post #22 of 169
I REALLY dislike the books that are condensed versions of Disney movies. Unless you have seen the movie and know what is happening, the book generally is choppy, reads so fast paced (I am almost out of breath when I am done reading it!) and jumps around so it is hard to know what is happening. Ugh, I groan everytime my kids grab that Disney collection of stories.

I also don't like any book based on TV. One of our rules when we go to the bookstore is "No books about TV characters or movies!" and that rules out just about every inexpensive book in the place.

I get sick of reading some of the books they have, like some of the longer fairy tales that take 30 minutes to read, but I still like them and always read them at their request.
post #23 of 169
Sandra Boynton's Hey, Wake Up!. Damn it, I don't want to wake up in the morning. (At least, not when my kids do). And when I do, I am not cheerful. I detest the overall cheeriness about getting up in that book.

Giving Tree. Ditto to what's been said. But even though I despise it, I don't have to read it over and over, unlike for example, Byron Barton's Machines at Work, which is a fine book (dig the women construction workers!) but after too many repetitions of it I am losing my mind.

And Arthur? Harumph! My ds picked one up at the library. We don't have tv, but I knew it was on PBS so I thought it would be harmless. Ha. Ds learned the fine phrase, "You stink" from that book, and I've never heard the end of it.
post #24 of 169
I don't like the choppy sentences and lack of pronouns in the Magic Treehouse books. I end up lengthening the sentences when I read them aloud. And I read a Junie B. Jones first grader book to my first grader who didn't understand why Junie B. spoke in grammatically incorrect ways as much as she did, so I had to change some of the things she said while I was reading.

These aren't toddler books, necessarily, but you've mentioned a lot of annoying ones already.

Yeah, I hate all those cartoon characters books, like the Disney ones, or any of them, really.
post #25 of 169
Originally Posted by TortelliniMama
The Rainbow Fish -- If you don't give people what they want, then no one will like you. Or, it's important not to stand out or be special in any way if you want friends.
And you have to physically mutilate yourself to fit in. I would have preferred if it had been a shiny rock collection rather than scales.

Another one DD1 once brought to me at a B&N is called Funny Bunny Honey Bunny (or some such), about a little girl who is essentially tortured by her brother. He finally listens to his parents and stops torturing her, but then ignores his sister. It ends with her condoning the torture as an expression of his love and things went back to "normal." Uck.
post #26 of 169
The Runaway Bunny:
"If you become the wind and blow me, I'll..."
Yeah. I skip the "blow me" part.
post #27 of 169
Dr. Seuss books are TOOOOO LOOOONNNNNGGGG.....

I am also appalled at the Serendipity books I thought were so great growing up.

And the Eric Carl Rooster book is sad when they all give up and go home.....
post #28 of 169
Originally Posted by nonnymoose
The Runaway Bunny:
"If you become the wind and blow me, I'll..."
Yeah. I skip the "blow me" part.
post #29 of 169
Calliou does it for me. Everytime I see DS Calliou books, that annoying Calliou cartoon theme song goes through my head, with Calliou annoying voice singing it AAHHH, Shut it up make it stop LOL. Oh well I have made my own words to that song(ones ds will never here LOL). And what's up with his lack of hair, at 4 years old he SHOULD have hair LOL. He have secret lukemia no one knows about?
post #30 of 169
Those "Spot" books. Man, are they ever dull as dirt. Also, they're another set with weird parenting practices from time to time.

Along the same lines, not a huge fan of the "Froggy" series or the Little Critter series.

I don't like Chicka Chicka 123. I'm not sure I even get the story, and I find the pictures boring.

Another secret non-fan of Goodnight Moon here, too.

I get sick of all the endless "mommy" books. Where is daddy? Can he love the baby more than anythingelseinthewholewideworld once in a while?

It always bums me out when I realize I've brought home a library book where some baby is toting around a bottle. (And I used bottles, because I ending up EPing...it just bugs.)
post #31 of 169
Originally Posted by earthflower
Definitely No David! When I opened this post this was the book that came to mind!

ITA!!! ugh.
post #32 of 169
Originally Posted by mollyeilis
Goodnight Moon drives me mad b/c of that one bad/non rhyme in it.

Which bad rhyme? I am drawing a blank.
post #33 of 169
has anyone ever heard of the "george's peekaboo farm" series, i really find it annoying, im not sure why but it's very irratating, and it happens to be my dd favorite books
post #34 of 169
OMG DS is OBSESSED with this book he got last week, all it is is pictures of like a boy, a girl, shoes, a duck, a dog, a cat, a train, a car....with the word under it. CONSTANTLY bringing me that thing to read to him!

And if I have to read "Max's Ride" ONE MORE TIME.....'Go' said Max. DOWN went Max. Over a bump, between two trees..... :P

Max's Bath isn't too bad, but we also haven't read it 17,000 times in a week yet!'
(DS is in a little book phase...I have to read to him a couple of times a day, a couple books each...)

I don't mind Sandra Boynton's Belly Button Book, I think it's pretty funny for a kid's book. I don't mind "Going On A Bear Hunt" even though we've read it about a MILLION times. Guess How Much I Love You I love, but I have thought it's kind of a competititive little story. (OK so I mostly like the end where the dad kisses the baby goodnight, and since DS was born, I've whispered to him that I love HIM 'right up to the moon and back.' A little sentimentality there.) I agree, Love You Forever is not really a kid's book.
post #35 of 169
OK, here's my confession: I get rid of books I can't stand! If I have read a book a few times and I really hate it I donate it and the kids never even ask where it is, lol. The result is a big library of books I really like and don't mind reading... unless dd is on one of her one-book-for-three-months jags and then I feel crazy.

The one book we have right now that I can't stand is Stella: Star of the Sea and I can't get rid of it because it's my dd's name, lol. It's long, boring, and repetitive in a long and boring way.
post #36 of 169
Originally Posted by the_lissa
Which bad rhyme? I am drawing a blank.
I had to go find it; the books that he loves drive me so crazy that DH is now the reader.

It's got a bit of a rhythm going, you know, "a comb and a brush and a bowl full of mush, And a quiet old lady who was whispering 'hush'"...and it's fun to say, you're sort of going circular with your voice, it's fun.

Then "goodnight room, goodnight moon" and all of a sudden..."goodnight cow jumping over the moon"?

What the? Moon and moon rhyme, I'll give you that. But you're not *supposed* to use the same word...:

The book is tripping lightly over my tongue and then it just goes clunk. ugh.
post #37 of 169
Anything with chimpanzees in the illustrations which get called monkeys. This includes Curious George, and "Hand Hand Fingers Thumb" which was one of my absolute favorites as a kid (I still love the rhythm to it, dum ditty dum ditty dum dum dum), but THOSE ARE NOT MONkEYS, THEY ARE CLEARLY CHIMPANZEES. They have no tails, for crying out loud! Curious George is shown knuckle walking. Monkeys don't knuckle walk, only African apes.

Okay, in HHFT, they might be bonobos, as evinced by their hair parts. But bonobos aren't monkeys either...
post #38 of 169
I loved guess how much I love you? It always made me cry, I did not see the comptetitive aspect at all, just a parent comforting the child. ALso good night moon always has a rythym, but alas does not always rhyme.
I did not like any books that are too long, I like the books that are simple and easy to follow for my young children. As they get older, the books will get more complex.
Also, parents don't expect your children to have the same view on life you do. They still believe in magic, and see things in a different way.
post #39 of 169
Originally Posted by the_lissa
Which bad rhyme? I am drawing a blank.

ha ha
i read this book to my son , but it is in weirdly translated spanish so I am not sure ...but I do know that you are referring to goodnight moon. My spanish stinks and so does my accent but I read it anyway .. I think it might be helping me to learn, not sure what it does for ds but he requests it all the time ...well he used to ...before he turned 3!

post #40 of 169
Berenstein Bears. Every time I have to read one of those things I want to scream. I cannot stand them..so darn preachy and self righteous...YUCK!
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